My Approach to Helping
Helping people to lessen their pain, understand themselves and live life more fully is what I do. Some people arrive depressed, anxious or grief stricken, some feel like outsiders, some are struggling with relationships or past trauma, some are not sure why they come but know that something does not feel right and I help them get started. As your therapist, I help you consider how you may be getting in your own way, how your past may be influencing your present and how certain tenacious patterns in your life may no longer be serving you. I actively engage and pay close attention to your cues as I both challenge and support. In a collaborative, safe and encouraging space, we converse about the many parts of you, including your past and present, your conscious and unconscious and your external and internal world. We also examine the relationship between you and me and consider how our interactions may mirror your relationships in the world outside. I use a psychoanalytic approach and integrate concrete recommendations for current problems as well as cognitive behavioral therapy when I think it would be helpful (e.g. negative thought patterns). Gradually, you will notice change: your mood may shift, your problems may lighten, you may approach your relationships and work in new ways, you may experience a broader range of feelings and gain access to buried and unknown parts of yourself. My goal is not only symptom relief, though that is surely welcome. I also hope to help you develop the insight and emotional capacity to feel fully comfortable in your skin, the resilience to withstand adversity and a deeper ability to connect to others and engage in work and play.
More Info About My Practice
I work with couples and individuals. I have advanced training in relational and modern psychoanalysis and Emotionally Focused Couples therapy. I graduated from Columbia College and was a lawyer for many years which gives me a keen understanding of the struggles individuals face in competitive and pressurized work environments. I do not accept insurance but am an "out of network" provider which often covers 60-80 percent of my fee and can assist with the claim submission process.
On the Fence About Going to Therapy?
"Do I want to expose myself to a stranger?" "Can't I just rely on my friends?" "Isn't therapy for people with more serious problems ?" "My life is so busy, isn't there a quicker process?" "Won't my problems just go away on their own?" "Will it really help me?" These are some questions people have about starting therapy. Entering therapy, like starting anything unfamiliar, can be unsettling at first. But, if the fit is right, you will develop a relationship with your therapist and quickly feel more comfortable. Therapy is different from a friendship because the focus is only on your life and, unlike a friend, a good therapist is trained to help you identify and understand the multiple sources of your problems, to work with your resistances and to recognize when their personal reactions may be interfering with their ability to support you. Therapy is for anyone who feels that something is not working in their life or who wants to understand themselves better. Therapy can be short or long term, depending on the issue, but lasting change does not generally come quickly, it is hard won. It would be nice if problems just disappeared, but if they are severe or have deep roots, they probably won't go away on their own. Whether therapy will help you depends on many things including the fit between you and your therapist, how much you put into it and how you define help. I will make sure I understand your goals and be straightforward about whether I believe they are realizable.
Important Factors for Choosing a Therapist
Choosing a therapist can be a daunting process, particularly when you are suffering. While there is no formula to choosing a therapist, there are some factors which when in place make it more likely you will have a positive experience. Firstly, is the therapist someone with integrity and compassion who you sense will have your best interests at heart? Secondly, can you imagine building a relationship with this person based on trust and mutual respect? Thirdly, has the therapist done their own significant therapeutic work so that they can recognize when their own issues may be clouding the treatment? Fourthly, has the therapist received advanced clinical training and are they engaged in on-going learning so that their approach is constantly reinvigorated and refined? Ultimately, you should trust your instincts and rest assured that if you do not immediately find a therapist with whom you think you can work, there are others out there with whom you can.