Joan Lavender


Joan Lavender


Professions: Psychologist, Psychotherapist
License Status: I'm a licensed professional.
Primary Credential: Clinical Psychologist - 010767
Billing and Insurance:

I don't currently accept insurance, but I can provide documentation if clients wish to submit to an insurance company for "out of network" benefit coverage

Fees: Out of Network and private payment. Fee $225 with some sliding scale available.


145 West 96 Street
Suite 1E
New York City, New York 10025

My Approach to Helping

I want to to share with you (briefly) what I have learned about helping people over the last 30 years. I see people grow from feeling deeply understood, from being related to in a way that helps to improve their self-esteem and compassion, and from studying their impact on others. People also grow from being given respectful direction and advice. Most people respond to these "emotional nutrients", whether you have anxiety, depression, trauma, relationship or personality issues. I have lots of experience helping people with these and other life issues.

Therapy is a special kind of human relationship, with clear boundaries, that helps you to sit with painful situations and issues in a constructive way that moves you forward. Reducing symptoms, learning to change patterns, learning to live better within yourself, are only a few parts of the process. You may be surprised to hear that psychotherapy can be a beautiful process, creative, interesting, inspiring and enduring.

Your therapist should convey a sense of comfort, thoughtfulness, knowledge and responsiveness, no matter what you share with them, from the first to the final session.

If I were searching for a therapist, that's what I would look for. I hope this helps you get a sense of my style.

More Info About My Practice

I am an Out of Network provider only. My fee is roughly $225.00 per 50 minute session and I can at times offer a sliding scale based on schedule. If your insurance covers OON providers, I would write you a bill that contains all the information your insurance company needs to consider reimbursement. There is much more about this on my new own website. For your own sake, please read and download it, regardless of who you select to be your therapist.

How My Own Struggles Made Me a Better Therapist

There is no doubt that working deeply on my own struggles has made me a sensitive and emotionally honest person/therapist who has compassion for a broad range of people and issues. Many people who have the courage to enter therapy have endured painful life situations alone - without anyone really appreciating what they have survived. Often, they need to make a healing relationship that decreases their loneliness and inspires them to create a better life. If my life experience can reduce your shame I am happy to thoughtfully share it with you. This is what makes psychotherapy the deeply humane experience that makes it truly transformational. After all these years, I am still astonished by the gentle power of a psychotherapy experience. It is creative, beautiful work, and of great practical value. Good or great psychotherapy is worth the time, money and effort. It is a life-altering experience.

What I Say to People Concerned about the Therapy Process

There are very specific ways of working with your fear of becoming overwhelmed. I tend to use an approach called Experiential Focusing because it is gentle yet deep, and has served as the foundation for other approaches such as Somatic Experiencing. I am very sensitive to each person's needs for safety. Central to this is the deepening trust and authenticity that we will create with each other over time. So, although there are many techniques out there, and I am familiar with many of them, it is our therapeutic relationship - not techniques- that always comes first.

Services I Provide

  • Clinical Supervision
  • Consultation
  • Family Therapy
  • Group Therapy
  • Individual Therapy & Counseling
  • Marriage, Couples, or Relationship Counseling

Ages I Work With

  • Teens
  • Adults
  • Elders


  • English

Groups I Work With

    Relationship issues of all kinds, trauma survivors, transition to young adulthood, problems of envy, midlife and beyond, women's issues, men who have difficulty expressing their feelings, being alone in the city, eating disorders, body image, see my websites for more details.

Client Concerns I Treat

  • Abandonment
  • Abuse / Abuse Survivor Issues
  • Academic Concerns
  • Adjusting to Change / Life Transitions
  • Aging and Geriatric Issues
  • Anxiety
  • Attachment Issues
  • Bipolar
  • Blended Family Issues
  • Body Image
  • Career Choice
  • Caregiver Issues / Stress
  • Codependency / Dependency
  • Communication Problems
  • Compulsive Spending / Shopping
  • Control Issues
  • Creative Blocks
  • Depression
  • Dissociation
  • Divorce / Divorce Adjustment
  • Eating and Food Issues
  • Emotional Abuse
  • Emotional Intelligence
  • Emotional Overwhelm
  • Emptiness
  • Family of Origin Issues
  • Family Problems
  • Fear
  • Forgiveness
  • Grief, Loss, and Bereavement
  • Habits
  • Health / Illness / Medical Issues
  • Helplessness / Victimhood
  • Identity Issues
  • Inadequacy
  • Inattention, Impulsivity, and Hyperactivity (ADHD)
  • Individuation
  • Infidelity / Affair Recovery
  • Irritability
  • Isolation
  • Life Purpose / Meaning / Inner-Guidance
  • Men's Issues
  • Midlife Crisis / Midlife Transition
  • Mood Swings / Mood Disturbance
  • Multicultural Concerns
  • Obsessions and Compulsions (OCD)
  • Panic
  • Phobias
  • Posttraumatic Stress / Trauma
  • Pre-Marital Counseling
  • Prejudice / Discrimination
  • Relationships and Marriage
  • Self-Care
  • Self-Confidence
  • Self-Criticism
  • Self-Doubt
  • Self-Esteem
  • Self-Harm
  • Self-Love
  • Sensitivity to Criticism
  • Sexual Assault / Abuse
  • Sexuality / Sex Therapy
  • Shame
  • Social Anxiety / Phobia
  • Spirituality
  • Stress
  • Suspiciousness / Paranoia
  • Trust Issues
  • Values Clarification
  • Women's Issues
  • Workplace Issues
  • Worry
  • Worthlessness
  • Young Adult Issues

Types of Therapy

  • Constructivisim
  • Creative Art Therapy
  • Dance / Movement Therapy (DMT)
  • Dialectical Behavioral Therapy (DBT)
  • Existential Psychotherapy
  • Focusing
  • Integration of different therapy models
  • Internal Family Systems (IFS)
  • Object Relations
  • Process Oriented Psychology
  • Psychoanalysis / Modern Psychoanalysis
  • Relational Psychotherapy
  • Schema Therapy
  • Self Psychology
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