By John Sovec, LMFT, LGBT Issues (Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender) Topic Expert Contributor

Click here to contact John and/or see his GoodTherapy.org Profile

Take a look at any magazine targeting the gay male market and what will you find on the cover? You will find eternally youthful sultry men with perfectly sculpted, hairless bodies who owe as much to the industry’s photo retouchers as they do to their personal trainers. Looking at these glaring moody images, it seems that these models’ only care is to remind you how unattainable they are. Turn the pages and look deeper into those magazines and you will find page after page of the same, from the ads to the editorial, it is easy to see how what is referred to as mainstream gay culture is obsessed with youth. The message is that in order to take your much-coveted place in the heart of the gay scene, you should be hot, you should be fit, but most of all, you must be young. This is what you should aspire to. Deviation is not encouraged. Read the rest of this entry

By Jimmy G. Owen, M.S., L.P.C., LGBT Issues (Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender) Topic Expert Contributor

Click here to contact Jimmy and/or see his GoodTherapy.org Profile

Joe is furious with his workmate but won’t risk talking to him about it. It’s easier to just grin and bear it. Denise sees the unhappiness in her partner, Beth’s face every day when she comes home from work, but doesn’t want to deal with it for fear of losing the relationship and everything that comes with it. Kevin disapproves of the “party” lifestyle he finds himself in, but doesn’t want his new friends to view him poorly.

For many, as gay men and women, keeping secrets is a way of life – a survival tool used early on as a way of protection with families, friends and careers or when the possibility of disapproval was unbearable. For some, wearing the mask of “what I think others want me to be” was thrown in the trash as coming out and self-acceptance occurred, while others continue to use it as a “go-to” in their coping survival kit. Read the rest of this entry

By John Sovec, LMFT, LGBT Issues (Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender) Topic Expert Contributor

Click here to contact John and/or see his GoodTherapy.org Profile

Remember back when you were in High School and the time came when your schedule would finally include that intriguing and informative health class, the one that your parents had to sign a special release waiver for you to attend? You know the one, the Sex Ed. class. This class is generally a source of mingled nervousness, embarrassment and curiosity, a combination of emotions most often expressed through much giggling, blushing and teasing.

So imagine what it might be like experiencing this class as a gay teen who may not be open or even understand about their sexuality yet. Imagine what it must be like to be confused and scared because your own natural feelings are pointing you in a direction that is different from those around you. The information provided in the vast majority of sex education lessons makes no mention of sex with someone of the same gender. Usually, the only time the subject of same-sex relations comes up is during discussions of STDs and AIDS. Read the rest of this entry

By Jimmy G. Owen, M.S., L.P.C., LGBT Issues (Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender) Topic Expert Contributor

Click here to contact Jimmy and/or see his GoodTherapy.org Profile

Whenever I am with a group of gay men, sex invariably becomes a topic of discussion. Often it is funny, sometimes sarcastic, biting and hurtful. However it appears, our culture, on the surface, has an ease about discussing sex in a way that I don’t encounter in heterosexual environments. I wonder what it is about our culture that makes this talk so easy, so expected… so normal? As a therapist, I am curious about where it comes from and how it affects us.

Sociologically speaking, if you look at the gay community as if it were an individual, we are a relatively young “out” person. Stonewall happened in 1969, which signified the first time we had the strength and visibility to be “out” and have a voice. That “out” voice is a mere 40 years old. Read the rest of this entry

By John Sovec, LMFT, LGBT Issues (Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender) Topic Expert Contributor

Click here to contact John and/or see his GoodTherapy.org Profile

As an educator and an advocate in the HIV/AIDS community I am often asked “Is AIDS still with us?” This question usually arises after the latest television story or news report about the newest treatments for HIV positive people.

According to the Center for Disease Control, the answer to that question is yes; the disease is still with us with over one million reported cases of people living with HIV in the United States alone. Worldwide the numbers become more staggering with UNAIDS estimating over 31 million people who have contracted HIV. Read the rest of this entry