My Approach to Helping
I think you're wise. I think you know most of the answers, you just need some help to find the wise voice in your head over all the other noise. My job is to give you a safe, nonjudgmental space to talk about how you are feeling, share the thoughts and feelings that you don't share with others. To start to hear how not all the noise in your head is useful or even true. I'll jump in with a thought, sarcasm, emotion, or humor to bring to light how your thoughts contradict themselves or how how they might not make sense when looked at thoughtfully, otherwise the floor is yours. It isn't till you say things out loud that you start to realize some of your beliefs may not stand up to scrutiny. I offer compassion and understanding. And the space to start to heal. Take the space to cry when you need (it is a cliché for a reason, right?) and the space to laugh when you need. All emotions will come up and they all teach you about yourself and your needs. I'll offer some tools for the road, but, mostly, this is about you feeling comfortable with yourself and working towards embodying the authentic version of yourself.
I will also support you as we talk about the ugly things that have happened in your past, to bring them into the light, so you can start to heal. I know that working with someone you feel comfortable and heard by is the foundation of being able to face the trauma in your history. I will start off telling you that I understand I may not be the right therapist for you. Therapy is an intimate relationship, and I want you to be with a therapist that you can trust and with whom you feel connected. That is the utmost importance for me. I can provide the safe space for you to share as you are comfortable, to look at what hurt piece of you that can take over your decision making when you are not watching. I want to help that part of you to feel safe.
I also believe that relationships are we heal and grow the most. The ones we love most are the ones who push our buttons and make us look at the pieces of ourselves we may not like that much. Even if you are coming alone, we may foray into communication and how relationships help you to grow. I also work with couples if you want to learn how to communicate and navigate conflict in a way that does not harm one another. Those skills that may have not been offered to you by your parents are the skills we will target together. I believe you can be the partner you want to be to your partner.