By Lisa Brookes Kift, MFT, Family of Origin Issues Topic Expert Contributor

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If you are one of the many out there who finds yourself in repetitive patterns of unhealthy relationships, perhaps you might benefit from identifying your attachment style – which not only could answer some fundamental questions for you around your relationship “triggers” but also provide clues as to why you attract certain types of people.

There is great deal of research out there on infant attachment (John Bowlby and Mary Ainsworth to name a few) about how early interactions with caregivers set up “internal working models” of expectations of how others will behave towards them in the future. Infants that do not feel physically or emotionally safe (responding to cries, mirroring appropriate facial expressions) with their primary caregivers may ultimately become adults who struggle in a variety of ways relationally. Read the rest of this entry

By Arthur Becker-Weidman, Ph.D., Attachment Topic Expert Contributor

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In a previous article I described what attachment is and how it develops. As I described, the attachment system is a proximity seeking system that evolved to ensure the survival of the human infant. It operates like your home heating and cooling system. If everything is fine (safe) you don’t see the system operating. When things get out of bounds, the heating or cooling system starts to operate. When a person feels some threat, the attachment system becomes activated and attachment behaviors are evoked. Attachment behaviors are proximity seeking behaviors that draw the person closer to a preferred caregiver. The proximity creates or renews or recreates a secure base; a sense of safety, security, and comfort from which the person, once settled, can begin exploring the world. Read the rest of this entry

By Ce Eshelman, LMFT, Attachment Topic Expert Contributor

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Attachment is the foundation upon which all human relationships are built, and touted by many as the most powerful predictor of all life successes. It is a wonder that something this integral to human existence is also so often overlooked and misunderstood by therapists who are considered relationship experts. When examining social work and counseling graduate degree programs, I am not surprised to find the typical program to have one obligatory course entitled “Development throughout the Life Span” and in atypical graduate schools there might be one additional course entitled “Child Development.” Unless the school is known for its focus on attachment theory, very little is taught to potential therapists across the country about attachment processes, attachment issues, attachment interventions, attachment treatment, or attachment healing. Unfortunately, we relationship experts often turn out to be humble students of the myriad of people in our offices struggling to heal the slings and arrows of attachment wounding. Being “as a student” can be a sensitive and wise way to approach another’s life lessons. However, in issues of attachment there is wisdom in becoming a scholar and knowledgeable practitioner in the theory and science of love. Read the rest of this entry

By Arthur Becker-Weidman, Ph.D., Attachment Topic Expert Contributor

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In this first article I’d like to briefly describe what attachment is. Broadly speaking, “attachment” generally refers to a connection between two. Informally, people talk about being “attached” to a person, a pet, a place, a thing. More specifically, attachment refers to an enduring emotional tie between two people. It is based on an emotional tie and grounded in trust and built upon a history of shared experiences (in technical terms, concordant intersubjectivity is experience in which emotion, attention, and intention are shared and congruent).

In technical terms, we can describe the attachment system, attachment behavior, and patterns of attachment. Let’s look at each of these for a moment. Read the rest of this entry

By Arthur Becker-Weidman, Ph.D., Dyadic Developmental Psychotherapy Topic Expert Contributor

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In this first article here I will describe what Dyadic Developmental Psychotherapy is. Dyadic Developmental Psychotherapy began as a family-therapy approach, grounded in attachment theory, for the treatment of children with disorders of attachment. It has developed over the past decade into a broader approach for treatment and has been found to be an evidence-based, effective, and empirically validated treatment.

Dyadic Developmental Psychotherapy has as its central therapeutic mechanism the maintenance of a contingent, collaborative, sensitive, reflective and affectively attuned relationship between therapist and child, between caregiver and child, and between therapist and caregiver. Dyadic Developmental Psychotherapy focuses on and relies upon the intersubjective sharing and joint development and organization of emotional experience. Intersubjectivity refers to shared emotion (also called attunement), shared attention, and shared intention. Read the rest of this entry

By Arthur Becker-Weidman, Ph.D.

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Many adopted and foster children have had very difficult and painful histories with their first parents. These children have experienced chronic early maltreatment within a caregiving relationship. Such a history can lead to the development of Complex Trauma (Cook et. al., 2003; Cook et. al., 2005), disorders of attachment, and Reactive Attachment Disorder. Children with histories of maltreatment, such as physical and psychological neglect, physical abuse, and sexual abuse, are at risk of developing severe psychiatric problems (Gauthier, Stollak, Messe, & Arnoff, 1996; Malinosky-Rummell & Hansen, 1993). These children are likely to develop Reactive Attachment Disorder (Greenberg, 1999; Lyons-Ruth & Jacobvitz, 1999). Approximately 2% of the population is adopted, and between 50% and 80% of such children have attachment disorder symptoms (Carlson, Cicchetti, Barnett, & Braunwald, 1995; Cicchetti, Cummings, Greenberg, & Marvin, 1990). Many of these children are violent (Robins, 1978) and aggressive (Prino & Peyrot, 1994) and as adults are at risk of developing a variety of psychological problems (Schreiber & Lyddon, 1998) and personality disorders, including antisocial personality disorder (Finzi, Cohen, Sapir, & Weizman, 2000), narcissistic personality disorder, borderline personality disorder, and psychopathic personality disorder (Dozier, Stovall, & Albus, 1999). Therapeutic Parenting is often necessary to help these children heal (Becker-Weidman, A., & Shell, D., 2005/2008). This approach to parenting is often not familiar to most parents and requires a significant amount of work and preparation. Attachment facilitating parenting is grounded in attachment theory and is based on a set of principles that include: Read the rest of this entry

By Arthur Becker-Weidman, Ph.D.

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Attachment is fundamental to healthy development, normal personality, and the capacity to form healthy and authentic emotional relationships. How can you determine whether your child has attachment issues that require attention? What is normal behavior, and what are the signs of attachment issues? If you’ve adopted an infant, when will you see attachment problems develop? These and other related questions are often at the forefront of adoptive parents’ minds. In this article I will help you understand what to look for and how to identify concerns. Read the rest of this entry

A GoodTherapy.org News Update Presented by Daniel Brezenoff, LCSW

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A team of researchers – three at Florida State University and one at Yale – have completed a persuasive study of Behavior Management Training (BMT) for treating Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD). The study, published in the journal Child Maltreatment, offers findings are encouraging to proponents of the classic reward and punishment system, and will likely lead to larger control studies.

RAD is a severe childhood disorder in which children display extremely inappropriate social behaviors, such as near total withdrawal and introversion (the inhibited form) or an almost complete lack of boundaries with strangers (the disinhibited form) sometimes with sexual or aggressive tendencies. These two ends of a behavioral spectrum may both be present in the same child at different times.

The disorder is rare, and its causes are well recognized. While in the general population it probably occurs in less than half a percent of children, among neglected children between ten and twenty percent are likely to develop RAD, and as many as one third of maltreated or abused children will meet the criteria for this diagnosis. In other words, this is an illness undoubtedly caused almost entirely by environmental factors. Read the rest of this entry

By Arthur Becker-Weidman, Ph.D.

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Attachment is the base upon which emotional health, social relationships, and one’s worldview are built. The ability to trust, and form reciprocal relationships, will affect the emotional health, security, and safety of the child, as well as the child’s development and future inter-personal relationships. The child with disordered attachment may be impulsive, doing whatever the child feels like, with no regard for others. This child may be unable to feel remorse for wrongdoings, mainly because the child is unable to internalize right and wrong. The child may tell you that something is wrong, but that will not stop the child from doing it. Read the rest of this entry