Max DeFrain


Max DeFrain


Telehealth Available
Professions: Marriage & Family Therapist
License Status: I'm a licensed professional.
Primary Credential: Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist - 134866
Billing and Insurance:
Fees: $150-$200
Evening Availability


Telehealth Only
San Francisco, California 94122
Telehealth Only
San Diego, California 92130

My Approach to Helping

I believe that creating a new relationship with our thoughts and emotions is the key to building the life that we want. There are countless beliefs held by society, family, and friends about how to deal with challenging and uncomfortable thoughts and emotions. Through my own mental health journey, I can relate to how many of these approaches are conflicting, confusing, or simply do not work. We can fall into the trap of struggling with our thoughts and emotions or letting them completely control our actions which often leads us away from what's important to us.

Through EFT, I can help you and your partner to identify your pattern of conflict, connect with your and your partner’s emotions, and move you toward deep intimacy and connection with each other. I can use ACT to help you unhook from difficult thoughts and emotions and act on what matters most to you.

EFT and ACT aren't just methods that I use and leave behind after work. They have created significant personal shifts that I live out in my life and relationships every day. I'm excited to share these approaches with you. Let's connect for an initial conversation to see if we could make a great team to move you towards the life you want.

My Therapy Focus

As someone who deals with perfectionism on a daily basis, I am passionate about working with people who struggle with perfectionism. You may think to yourself, is perfectionism really such a bad thing? Being a perfectionist or an over achiever or a workaholic is practically a badge of honor in our culture. I'm not looking to undo your hard work ethic or your passion to achieve your goals and dreams. I want to help you to unhook from unhelpful perfectionism that keeps you stuck and gets in the way of the things that matter to you.

Rigid goals that you must achieve, no matter what can leave you feeling depleted and dissatisfied when you inevitably fail to meet all of your standards perfectly, all of the time. Being motivated to achieve your goals by a constant fear of failure is exhausting and can suck the enjoyment and passion out of pursuing your dreams. Frequent self criticism can leave you feeling never good enough. Attempting to avoid failure at all costs can lead you to overprepare and overwork or it can lead you to withdraw and never pursue your goals in the first place.

Perfectionism can underpin a lot of common diagnoses (anxiety, depression, etc.) and can drive issues in different areas of your life (work issues, relationship issues, etc.) and, therefore, can often be missed during therapy. In our work together we will pinpoint how perfectionism is showing up for you specifically. We will then create a plan to help you to untangle from the baggage that comes with unhelpful perfectionism, opening the way for you to fully harness your natural drive to accomplish your goals and dreams.

If you think you may struggle with unhelpful perfectionism, reach out to me today to schedule a free 15 minute phone consultation!

Video Message

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Services I Provide

  • Individual Therapy & Counseling
  • Marriage, Couples, or Relationship Counseling
  • Telehealth

Ages I Work With

  • Adults


  • English

Client Concerns I Treat

  • Adjusting to Change / Life Transitions
  • Anxiety
  • Attachment Issues
  • Bipolar
  • Communication Problems
  • Depression
  • Emotional Overwhelm
  • Emptiness
  • Inadequacy
  • Men's Issues
  • Perfectionism
  • Rejection
  • Social Anxiety / Phobia
  • Worry
  • Worthlessness

Types of Therapy

  • Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT)
  • Emotionally Focused Therapy

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