What Is Self-Regulation and Why Is It So Important?

Person's face with eyes closed, mouth open in a screamThe term self-regulation means “control [of oneself] by oneself.” It refers to a system taking the needed steps to keep itself in balance. Many different systems can self-regulate, including businesses, communities, financial institutions, political campaigns, and industries. In biology and somatic psychotherapy, self-regulation refers to an organism (a biological creature) being in a state of balance.

Self-regulation of biological creatures (such as you and me) occurs on many different levels. For example, someone who has good emotional self-regulation has the ability to keep their emotions in check. They can resist impulsive behaviors that might worsen their situation, and they can cheer themselves up when they’re feeling down. They have a flexible range of emotional and behavioral responses that are well matched to the demands of their environment. Thanks to neuroplasticity, the adaptability of our nervous systems, humans are fortunately able to improve their emotional self-regulation over time.

Our bodies also have the capacity for self-regulation. There are many examples. On a purely biological level, a well-functioning pancreas keeps our blood sugar in the range our body needs in order to function optimally. Our heart rate speeds up when we exercise, and our muscles need more oxygen and sugar. The heart rate slows when we are in a state of rest, and the muscles need fewer supplies from the bloodstream.

Similarly, the autonomic nervous system works to keep order below the level of our awareness. It regulates and balances many automatic functions of our bodies, including emotions. One of the most important (and frequently overlooked!) functions it regulates is our automatic, instinctive response to perceived threats in the environment. Our threat response system determines whether we are angry and want to fight, or scared and want to flee, or hunker down until the threat passes (freeze). This is known as the fight, flight, or freeze response.

When these responses are out of balance with our environment, we are not self-regulating well and we experience symptoms. This is why self-regulation is so important.

The fundamental goal of somatically based psychotherapy is to restore healthy self-regulation, resilience, and the capacity to be fully present in the moment. By integrating somatic tools into therapy, it is possible to work directly with symptoms “where they live”—in the person’s body and nervous system.

When our fear response is out of proportion to the current situation, we call that anxiety. It would be appropriate to experience a pounding heart, rapid breath, jitteriness, and intense fear if a grizzly bear were trying to attack us. On the other hand, these same physical symptoms are excessive if we are grocery shopping, conversing with a friend, or at home reading a book.

Here’s another example: When Jill was a little girl, her father often had bouts of rage. Since Jill was very small, she was incapable of standing up to him to actively protect herself. Had she tried, his rage likely would have increased, and she would have been physically overpowered. As a small child, she was dependent on her parents; she couldn’t flee by getting a job and moving. She learned that becoming still and quiet was usually effective in avoiding his attention and anger. As an adult, she still tends to “freeze” in many situations where being more active and assertive would be a more effective response. She also may experience fear and anxiety when there is no actual threat to her safety. We can say that because of Jill’s early upbringing, her capacity for self-regulation was disrupted. Now she needs support to develop improved self-regulation skills so she can function better and increase her enjoyment of life.

Whether or not it’s overtly stated, the goal of most therapy is to restore balance—self-regulation—in an individual, couple, or family. Since the threat response and related emotions are biological in nature, it is often useful to include awareness of the person’s bodily responses during the therapy session. For example, a person who has learned to notice when their heart rate is increasing and their jaw is clenching can take specific actions to stop a rage or panic attack before it really gets rolling.

In somatic psychotherapy, the therapist and person in therapy attend to the latter’s history, thoughts, emotions, and relationships, and the relationship between person in therapy and therapist (therapeutic relationship), just like in “regular” therapy. However, they also include a moment-to-moment awareness of what the person’s autonomic nervous system and body are “saying.” The person learns to have two-way communication between mind and body, which is often effective in restoring self-regulation and relief from symptoms.

The fundamental goal of somatically based psychotherapy is to restore healthy self-regulation, resilience, and the capacity to be fully present in the moment. By integrating somatic tools into therapy, it is possible to work directly with symptoms “where they live”—in the person’s body and nervous system. Over time, these efforts to restore self-regulation allow the person to move on with their life, stronger and more resilient than ever.


  1. Cook, J. L., & Cook, G. (2009). Child development principles and perspectives (352-355). New York, NY: Pearson.
  2. Definition of neuroplasticity. (n.d.). MedicineNet.com. Retrieved from http://www.medicinenet.com/script/main/art.asp?articlekey=40362
  3. Perry, B. D. (n.d.). Self-regulation: The Second Core Strength. Early Childhood Today. Retrieved from http://teacher.scholastic.com/professional/bruceperry/self_regulation.htm
  4. Self-regulation. (n.d.). Retrieved from http://www.dictionary.com/browse/self-regulation

© Copyright 2016 GoodTherapy.org. All rights reserved.

The preceding article was solely written by the author named above. Any views and opinions expressed are not necessarily shared by GoodTherapy.org. Questions or concerns about the preceding article can be directed to the author or posted as a comment below.

  • Leave a Comment
  • Seth

    September 28th, 2016 at 8:04 AM

    Important because who wants to be around someone who can’t control their emotions?

  • Kelly

    September 28th, 2016 at 10:29 AM

    I somehow feel that much of what is wrong is that some people never learn these skills as children so then they certainly don’t have them as an adult. Sorry but no one benefits when you let a child down in that way.

  • Savannah

    September 28th, 2016 at 2:37 PM

    Often there are these things that happen to us in our everyday lives and if you are unable to self regulate then quite frankly they will probably make you flip your lid. If you have the necessary coping skills then these are not things that will send you over the edge. But of you don’t have those skills and you are unable to manage them in a healthy way then it could be very likely that someone will get injured or hurt because of the steady steam of emotions that you can’t control.

  • bliss

    September 29th, 2016 at 7:28 AM

    important for your own health too

  • Mall

    September 30th, 2016 at 7:39 AM

    You gotta have some self control if you expect other people to ever want to be around you.

  • holly

    December 30th, 2016 at 4:25 PM

    Self regulation with emotions is extremely important. Impulse control is a must and i truly believe this all should be taught in schools K-12. Resilience needs to be taught, it is not innate and adults/parents need to understand and take lessons on this also.

  • GARY

    February 23rd, 2022 at 10:34 AM

    Great site.

Leave a Comment

By commenting you acknowledge acceptance of GoodTherapy.org's Terms and Conditions of Use.


* Indicates required field.

GoodTherapy uses cookies to personalize content and ads to provide better services for our users and to analyze our traffic. By continuing to use this site you consent to our cookies.