Gary Seeman, Psychologist in San Francisco, 94104

Gary Seeman, Ph.D.

Profession(s):
Psychology, Psychotherapy, Marriage & Family Therapy
License Status:
I'm a licensed professional.
Primary License:
Psychologist - PSY 19356

My Approach to Helping

When people first contact me, the question I hear most often is, "can tell me how you do therapy?" I usually answer that I vary my approach, depending on their needs. This is not a dodge. They've asked a question that doesn't have a simple, one-size-fits-all answer. I then add that in general, I'm not one of those therapists who sits and nods with a knowing look, offering nothing more as they speak of their most difficult challenges. But my level of interaction is also balanced with listening, when that's called for. I don't think it's helpful for me to dominate the conversation like some television therapists who excel in telling people what to do. I do recognize that often people need direction, education or skills training, and I'll provide this. But situations vary. Some need to speak about what's emotionally important to someone who will listen without interrupting. They often apologize for "rambling," but I tell them that self-discovery doesn't unfold in straight lines. You may need to wander through your thoughts and feelings. This helps you have a spontaneous experience of self that's hard to come by in other contexts, and I'm supportive of that. People who haven't had therapy may not know how scary a person can feel when revealing their private selves. But let's face it, for most of us, it's hard to talk about sensitive issues! The problems that bring people to seek professional help are usually so challenging that they've been been unable to solve them themselves. This situation can inherently induce feelings of shame, guilt or inadequacy. To open oneself up this way is extremely vulnerable and it requires the presence of another who can put you at ease.Those who enter therapy primarily for self-discovery can find the process paradoxical. One of my meditation teachers uses the metaphor of a flashlight to describe the mind. You shine the light of awareness on your reality to explore it. But trying to explore your own mind can seem like trying to turn the flashlight back on itself! (This is a Buddhist teaching metaphor used by Lama Kunzang Rinpoche.) The key, I've found, is to trust simple awareness and allow yourself to not know until you do.Theoretical OrientationMy theoretical orientation is integrative, which means that I adjust my work to the individual's or couple's unique needs, using what I've learned from a variety of psychological approaches. It's not unusual for people looking at the list below to see what appears to be a patchwork of theory. However, I've found that many of these approaches provide their own perspectives on the same underlying phenomena. The major therapeutic approaches that inform me include:1) Depth work: Jungian interpretation and dreamwork, transpersonal, object relations and psychodynamic theory (developmental view of attachment and character structure); 2) Brief therapy: Solution-focused; also Cognitive Behavior Therapy (CBT), helping you revise identification with thoughts and feelings that make thinking rigid and drive dysfunctional moods and behavior; 3) Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT): Assisting people who have trouble regulating emotional reactions and behavioral responses with mindfulness and a way to navigate between opposites (dialectics) rather than overly identify with either position in an emotional dilemma or life challenge; 4) Social Learning Theory: Addressing how life experiences helps shape our behavior, beliefs and responses; 5) Education: Teaching psychological concepts and findings in person and through writing to help you understand your thoughts, behaviors and issues; 6) Psychiatric/medical psychology, including work with clients who have achieved long-term stability on psychiatric medication; 7) Transpersonal psychology, my own integrative, non-dogmatic orientation to spirituality and religion that is grounded in many years of personal meditation practice; and study of some of the world's religious traditions, the original writings of C. G. Jung, parapsychological research, and early study of cults and coercive group indoctrination

More Info About My Practice

I am on several insurance panels and encourage you to visit my web site, which has current listings. Since there are many different contracts for any insurance company, please give them a call to make sure you're covered if you choose to work with me.

On the Fence About Going to Therapy?

Find a therapist you find it easy to talk to, just as you would with a new friend. A therapist isn't your friend, of course, but you're selling yourself short if you don't choose someone with whom you have personal rapport -- even if this means interviewing many therapists to find one who's a good fit.

How My Own Struggles Made Me a Better Therapist

Absolutely! Life experience is an opportunity to learn or become more isolated and defended. And learning goes deep if someone has had their own struggles. Even the experience of being in therapy qualifies this way. I know what it was like to sit in front of an older person with all those credentials and how difficult it was to talk about those areas where I felt most ashamed, helpless or vulnerable. Seeking therapy is an act of courage if you're going to go at all deep. For those of you who want to know more about my personal background and past struggles, please visit my web site.

Services I Provide

Individual Therapy & Counseling
Marriage, Couples, or Relationship Counseling

Ages I Work With

Adults
Elders

Languages I Speak

English

Groups I Work With

writers, artists, musicians, creative people, professionals, executives, couples, spiritual seekers, alcoholics, addicts, ordinary folks, intelligent people