My Approach to Helping
I help adults struggling in relationships overcome their worries and anxiety so that they can have deeper, more authentic and connected relationships. It can be frightening and frustrating to try to deal with the struggles of anxiety and worry in relationships on your own and without guidance to help you cope with these uncomfortable feelings. By creating a safe environment to explore and understand one's underlying feelings, one creates more freedom and choice in how to respond in a relationship as opposed to repeating old painful patterns and reactions, which can leave one feeling more disconnected and alienated. This change in response can be terrifying for people and I help support people through this change.
In order for healthy change to take place for somebody who worries and has anxiety in relationships I believe three things must take place for an individual. Firstly, I believe understanding the origins of where these uncomfortable feelings come from is important in order to create choices for people. If we are constantly recycling old patterns of relating to others, we lose our freedom and ability to connect in the present day. Changing these patterns can be difficult and painful and having support to recognize what changes are needed and a guide to support these changes is imperative. Secondly, the ability to regulate one's emotions is important to move from feeling overwhelmed and chaotic to a more direction centred approach to communicating and connected to others and life in general. This process of learning emotional regulation can be difficult especially during stressful times in a relationship. I help people develop this internal emotional regulation to better cope with a relationship's inevitable ups and downs. Lastly, I believe that practice is essential to move from theory to real life experiences and for true change to take place one must move out of his or her comfortable zone. I assist people in practicing healthy forms of connection in the here and now.