My Approach to Helping
Originally from Raleigh-Durham NC, I have lived in Western North Carolina for the past 11 years. I am a LCMHCA and earned a MS in Counseling
To the misunderstood, the misdiagnosed, and the overly diagnosed; to those who feel a sense of being stuck; to those experiencing deep, overwhelming thoughts and emotions; to those who wonder if there might be a different way or if anyone could ever understand and accept them; to those who struggle to feel or understand their own behaviors, thoughts, and emotions; to those who believe they may never be good enough; to those who believe they may be irreparably broken or damaged:
I am called to meet you with curiosity, creativity, and understanding. I hold the deep conviction that life's conundrums and circumstances call for getting to know ourselves much more deeply while being seen, heard, and held in healing relationship and supportive community. This conviction is deepened by the theory and practice of modern psychoanalysis, as backed by the newest findings in the fields of neuroscience and attachment theory.
Like every other living plant and creature on this planet, we thrive in symbiosis, and dwindle when those symbiotic, nurturing relationships are diminished. Though it is certainly tempting to believe that we can think our way out of or will our way into feelings and situations (and all on our own at that), the nature of being human tells us that how we are taken care of often affects our wellbeing most. It is with this in mind that I delight to know you, to invite all of you, and to provide an environment where you might explore saying everything. Perhaps beyond the categories and labels to which we have been assigned; beyond the narratives that we have come to believe about ourselves over the years; there is a different way of relating, being, and understanding ourselves. Perhaps there is more to know and love about ourselves than we have previously been taught.
More Info About My Practice
Modern psychoanalysis is the culmination of theories and techniques developed over the last century which assert that our behaviors and beliefs about ourselves and the world originate from a combination of external resources, temperament, and our earliest childhood experiences. They affirm that simply willing ourselves to change and even just understanding ourselves is not enough. It is the act of noticing, being curious, talking, and being seen and heard in therapeutic relationship that creates long-term healing and can resolve internal barriers to change. Our early experiences shape the way we come to be and survive in this world, the ways in which we do or do not attach to others in relationship, and the ways in which we develop patterns of behaviors, thoughts, and feelings as we respond to the world in the best way we know how. These patterns may have been helpful in getting what we needed at an earlier time, in a previous relationship, or within our early family system. However, some patterns then fail to best serve us later in our lives. Some of the most common questions one might be asking are "why does this keep happening to me?" or "why do I keep doing that?" to which the deepest internalized answer is often "because there must be something wrong with me." Modern psychoanalysis reminds us that we are simply living creatures doing our best to get our needs met (which at times may have had to include believing that we are flawed or broken). It is the means by which, through talking, we become more playfully acquainted with our feelings and thoughts, and explore what would be necessary to feel safe saying everything. We learn that our feelings, experiences, and behaviors are windows of information to explore; natural and understandable reactions to a human experience that is full of hardship and joy alike; messages that our bodies and minds are sending to us about what we really need. So, throughout the analytic process, we may gain better acceptance of ourselves in the context of a therapeutic relationship that comes closer to giving us what we really needed in childhood. We may become more and more aware over time, bringing our unconscious thoughts, feelings, and motivations to the surface. We may then begin to feel safe enough to risk change in a way that puts us back in the driver's seat of our lives.
My View on the Purpose of Psychotherapy
Being alive can be a dynamic, aching, joyful, unsettling, terrifying, dull, blissful (and all that is in between) experience, and there are a multitude of reasons that lead someone to seek counseling. For some, there is a specific and pressing issue. For others, a general long-felt feeling or pattern leads one to reach out. In any case, the ways in which to explore and understand the human mind and experience are limitless. Understanding ourselves literally, metaphorically, biologically, interpersonally, artistically, and existentially begins to scratch the surface of and grasp what it is to be us.
On some days, it may be comfort or safety that you seek; on others, you may seek immediate, emergency solutions. Some days, you may not know initially what you are coming in to talk about, and then to your surprise, a general free-flowing journey into your mind and the wonders of life may take place. For some, it may be easy, gratifying, and helpful to discuss openly those vast feelings and put words to those experiences. For others, it may be more true that putting words to things is a challenge and so the task may be to get curious about what makes that so. Counseling and psychotherapy, like the layers of a rose, takes on the form of an ever unfolding process not to be good or perfect, but good enough.
