Stress – Five Simple Ways to Relax
January 8th, 2009
By Debbie Devine, MS, LPC
Click here to contact Debbie and/or see her GoodTherapy.org Profile
It contributes to illness. It’s the major factor in back pain. In fact, it makes ANY pain worse. And it’s not always caused by bad things-it can be related to celebrations, new jobs, holidays, new babies, and many other things we would never wish away.
Yes, I’m talking about stress, or as defined by Webster’s, “a strain or pressure on the body or mind.” It’s almost always presented as a reason people finally get professional help for life issues, and I diagnose and treat it daily.
The body and mind perceive any change as potential danger, and they react with heightened awareness, muscle tension, and increased cortisol production (cortisol is that nasty hormone that can increase blood pressure and blood sugar, and suppress immune response). It is essential to our overall health to learn to reduce stress responses in our body and mind. The following are some ways to do so:
Breathing
Under constant stress, our breathing becomes shallow and strained. A simple exercise is to sit back in your chair for a minute or two, close your eyes, and just focus on your breath. Breathe in deeply through your nose to the count of four, using the ticking of a clock if you have one. Hold your breath for four counts, and then SLOWLY let the air out for six beats. This deliberate focus and attention will both calm and distract your mind temporarily.
Guided Imagery
This is an article all by itself, but basically guided imagery involves taking time to mentally “visit” your favorite relaxing memory-be it the beach, the woods, whatever brings a smile to your face- and mentally placing yourself there using all five senses. This also works with visualizing a beloved child’s face or your pet. A few minutes of visualization a day can actually increase immune response and is simple to do.
Tense/Relax (Progressive Muscle Relaxation)
Starting at the top of your head, tense and relax the muscles of your face, neck, hands, shoulders, etc, all the way to your toes. Hold the tension to a count of four, and then let it go, moving on to the next muscle group. This puts a focus on muscles that may have been tight without your awareness.
Journaling
The benefit of scribbling down thoughts and feelings is well researched. You don’t need to watch spelling, grammar or anything else, as no one will see it. You don’t even have to “keep” a journal-just the act of writing in itself is beneficial, even if you shred it immediately after! Try completing these sentences to start:
It really bugged me today when….
If I could wave a magic wand I would change…
Then just keep writing without thought or censure.
Doing Nothing
A totally foreign concept to our goal oriented society, isn’t it? But sitting completely still in silence for a few minutes a day is a wonderful way to de-stress. As we let the mind daydream, rest and wander, we often find new solutions to our stressors. This concept is summarized by the beautiful quote: “Sitting quietly, doing nothing, spring comes, and the grass grows by itself” (Zen saying).
If these simple measures don’t ease your stress symptoms, the next step is to seek help from a licensed therapist who can help you resolve underlying issues contributing to the problem. Best of all, these simple steps to de-stress can’t hurt!
©Copyright 2009 by Debbie Devine MS, LPC, Diplomate, therapist in Rockwall, TX. All Rights Reserved.
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Comments
I really love the guided imagery. Not only with Stress, but when I want to fall asleep, I use the guided imagery to lull me off to sleep.
I told myself that 2 years would be very stressful with a baby and preschooler. I was patient with my baby but had really bad mood swings with my husband. My husband helps when at home but his work day is long and most of the time I dont have the heart to ask him to help me. Today at 4 my son is still a handful. He is very well behaved otherwise but is extremely hyper at home. I work from home these days but I am still an at home mom. I find his whims and fancies just too much to handle these days. I am still very stressed as it is difficult to get any me time through the day. How do I destress?
Very good article. I have heard these steps before when I remember, I try to take several Deep breaths. I have also heard Stress prevents you from losing weight due to the cortisol and that is something I do not need.
I do the breathing excercises almost every day. My job gets very stressful at times and there are some times where i just need to step away from it all, go somewhere quiet and just Breathe. This really does work. Glad to see this article
I like the examples that you gave for relieving and helping to reduce stress but I have another one that always works for me. I started running almost two years ago for exercise, and not only have I been pleased with how this has helped to transform my outer self, but it has worked wonders for my inner self as well. When I have had the most horrible day all I have to do is put on the running shoes when I get home and either take off for a run outside or on the treadmill and immediately all of my stress melts away. I do not know what it is about this activity that does this but it works and I am not gonna stop until the feet stop working. This has made such a tremendous difference for me in my life and I hope that others will consider adding a little activity in addition to the other great ideas listed here to help get rid of all of the nagging stress and anxiety that so many of us carry around with us on a daily basis.
The breathing exercise work really well for me. I have a job with a lot of stress and I always take a little time during my lunch break to do some of the guided breathing exercises and to get the day back in focus so that I can just make it through it!
Has anyone tried yoga? That always helps me end my stressful days on a more positive note.
Massage therapy is great too. I’ve just started doing this to help rid my body (i.e. knots, tension) of the stress. It’s wonderful!
Massage therapy sounds wonderful…. Just wish I knew how to do it.
I have tried running and although it gives me a breath of fresh air, It is so hard on my shins… I find just working out for about 15 minutes a day clears my head.
I love to meditate… This is so relaxing to me and I envision a serene area that I would love to be, just me and me alone…. I like to imagine that I am on a secluded beach with cliffs all around showing off beautiful greenery and bright blue skies
Thanks everyone for sharing your de-stress tips. Exercise, massage are all wonderful.
Susan, I see a lot of stay at home moms as counseling clients and the number one stressor is the 24-7 aspect of the job and feeling unsupported by society in general. Don’t let the stress overwhelm you before you seek parenting guidance and answers from a licensed therapist. Take care of YOU or “the whole operation” goes down!
Debbie
I find it very interesting that many clients are stay at home moms. This just goes to show that this job is indeed thankless and that we need to do more to help the mothers in these situations. While there are many who would not trade this experience for anything, it can be a very isolating feeling to be left at home all day and then have to continue the job thru the nightime hours as well. I can see that for many stay at homers that it must feel as if they never get any down time and the job never ends. I can easily see how this would escalate the stress in their lives and cause them to seek an outlet thru counseling.
It seems like stress becomes so much a part of our lives, like me, It seems like I am so used to it, although I do need to unwind and need some relief every now and then. If I sit for too long at a time and do nothing, I become bored and antsy, and need to find something, anything to do.. But on those days where everythng seems crazy, I welcome the peace and quite.
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