Sad girl in chair with parents in backgroundWe know that when a marriage ends it is the parents who are divorcing. But do we think about the fact that our children aren’t getting a divorce, they are getting two households in which to continue living with their family. Their parents relationship is changing to something different than they have yet experienced. What do you need to think about so that your children are taken care of as well as possible? For some, the question is what rights do children have in a divorce? Here’s a list that is a good place to start.

1. Children have the right to live in a conflict-free zone. Your children should not have to go back and forth between two homes feeling the anger and tension between their parents. The best way to deal with this is to take care of the issues you are in conflict over. Find a way to work out your disagreements. Work with a third party if necessary, but keep the conflict out of the co-parenting relationship so it is out of the lives of your children. When children do not do well after their parent’s divorce, this is the number one reason why that is the case.

2. Children have the right to love each of their parents. Your children should be able to feel and express that love without interference from anyone. You may have an opinion of your ex that you feel your child needs to be taught about so they can be better protected. Unless your ex is truly dangerous and a court has found this to be true, do not subject your children to your beliefs that make it difficult for them to be in your presence and also feel love for their other parent. The other parent has also had a part in creating your children. Children will sometimes become safe-hating if they perceive that they have traits that are similar to the other parent. This may play out differently depending on the age of the child. It is important to consider it no matter the age.

[fat_widget_left]3. Children have the right to not be the emotional support for their parents during the divorce. When your child is growing up, your relationship with them changes. They are more able to have heartfelt conversations with you and can understand more complex emotions. When you are going through a divorce and you have a developing relationship with your teenage child, it is very tempting to tell them about what is going on for you in the way they have started to tell you what is going on for them and how they are thinking about the world. It is not the time to start telling them about your divorce and your feelings and your concerns. You are talking with them about their other parent, not your boss or friend with whom they do not have their own relationship. Protect them from the information that will be a burden for them to know. Do not ask your child to take care of you by listening and being your support. It is true you are in an emotionally difficult time in your life and you may need more care taking than usual. You should get taken care of in an appropriate place so you are best able to take care of your children while their world is changing as well. Keep in mind that children often like it when they are treated like adults. They will not tell you it is not what they want because they might like the newfound intimacy they are having in their children while their world is changing as well. Keep in mind that children often like it when they are treated like adults. They will not tell you it is not what they want because they might like the newfound intimacy they are having in their relationship with you.

4. Children have the right to not feel responsible for their parent’s divorce. It sometimes happens that children believe their parents are getting divorced because of something they did. They can feel responsible for the fights you have because of something they asked for that you may have disagreed on. They may think their behaviors when told they had done something wrong could contribute to their family changing in this very big way. Children believe their actions have more far-reaching effects than is actually the case. Feelings of guilt and shame often accompany these thoughts and they are not always shared with anyone. When telling your children you are divorcing it is helpful to make sure they know that there was nothing they did to bring this about and it is most helpful if you can tell them together.

5. Children have the right to not be the messenger for their parents. Because it seems logistically easier, backpacks, suitcases, notebooks, etc. that belong to your children are often thought to be appropriate conduits for material that needs to go back and forth between households. This is very often problematic. Children should not be the messengers for support checks, important papers, etc. It sometimes happens that the material that is brought with them in the transition is upsetting to the receiving parent. Perhaps the amount of the check is not what they had expected or the paperwork is inflammatory. This has the impact of your child feeling as though they are the reason you are not happy and they are somehow at fault. It is very important that your children not take part in any exchanges between you. They deserve to be protected from the information you are sending to the other parent.

These are just a few of many things to be aware of as you go through this process. It helps to try to look through the world periodically through the eyes of your child.

Father and son playing with paper airplaneLast week, I had the honor of attending and speaking at Postpartum Support International’s 25th Annual Conference in Seattle, WA. I was moved and inspired by the amazing work gestating and being born in the perinatal world by so many compassionate professionals. (Refresher: “perinatal” refers to the time from conception, through pregnancy, on through the first year after having a baby.)

My dear colleague Gabrielle Kaufman, BC-DMT, NCC and I presented a workshop on special needs parenting as relates to the family experiencing perinatal challenges. Both Gabrielle and I have found in our practices a large number of women and families who are impacted by the double whammy of a perinatal mood/anxiety disorder (PMAD), coupled with parenting a special needs child. We felt it was important to highlight this population of folks who are in great need of resources and support. Although this subject could be an entire week-long conference, we discussed the following highlights that are pertinent for special needs families and the people that support them.

It’s hard to define special needs, as we all are special and we all have challenges. We choose to define special needs as a child in a family system who is experiencing the challenge of a neurological, emotional, behavioral, developmental, or physical disability. This challenge affects the entire family system on several levels.

  1. One in 10 children have a disability (neurological, emotional, behavioral, developmental, physical)
  2. Parents of special needs children are more at risk for depression and anxiety
  3. Couples (parents) of special needs children benefit from support such as psychotherapy and regular date nights (50% or more of all special needs couples divorce)
  4. “Neurotypical” siblings benefit from support in the form of sibling support groups, one-on-one attention from parents, and open-ended discussion of feelings/solutions to concerns associated with being a special needs family (i.e., role-playing how to handle being in public with special needs sibling, preventing parentification, etc.)
  5. Stigma is real and exists, even in the 21st century. Therefore, family discussions need to happen to address this concern and to build social support networks.
  6. Family/couple/individual therapy and support groups were found to be helpful in buffering the effects of stress and lowering depression/anxiety in these family systems in several studies
  7. The special needs family is exposed to chronic stress and therefore requires an ongoing stress management program that will lower the effects of cortisol and adrenaline (the fight or flight response) that develop. For example, self-care, yoga, psychotherapy, respite care, support groups.

Below are some helpful resources we found to be beneficial.

Resources

Organizational Aids:

Books:

Parental Self-Care:

Other Materials:

This list of resources is far from comprehensive, as every day the Web has new sites on the special needs family. We chose to highlight a few websites and books which we found to be helpful for our clients and our practice, as perinatal psychotherapists.

Parents and teen kids talking“I don’t know.” Is it the stock answer teens give their parents for every question? Does it mean more than just a lack of an answer? How do we get them to speak to us and to have a conversation? There are ways to talk to teens, develop relationships through communication and not feel like an interrogator.

To get around the “I don’t know”, start by changing your attitude, mood, and how you start the conversation. Connect with them with a high energy greeting showing your good disposition. The frame of mind that you display sets the tone for the conversation. A high energy, happy greeting and smile goes a long way towards setting the mood and showing your child that you are happy and that they have nothing to fear by being open and honest with you. Teens, unless they prove to you otherwise, want their parents to be proud of, and accepting of, them. Set the stage of your conversation so that they are comfortable; help them by making it as easy as possible for them to talk to you. Ask questions that cannot be answered with just a simple ‘yes’ or ‘no’ response.

“I don’t know” is a response with many different meanings; it can be “no one has asked me that before” and “I genuinely have no idea how to answer”.  This is your chance to be silent and let them mull it over for a few moments. When you are silent, it puts the emphasis back on to the adolescent to come up with an answer. Show them that you are interested and receptive to what they are going to say. Your body language conveys your curiosity – lean forward, face them, make good eye contact without being overbearing, and be aware of the voice you use when you talk. After a few moments of quiet, change the question subtly but ask them the same basic question; continue to show them interest.  You can give them an idea by rephrasing your question to help spark their response.

At times, the response “I don’t know” means, “I have thought about it and I really do not have an idea or opinion one way or another”.  If you think their response means this, clarify it with them.  This is a valuable time to teach them and to share yourself openly to increase trust and amplify the quality of your relationship. Kindly ask questions and have a conversation about their thought process, find out where they were stuck in searching out an answer.  You can share your experience in how you would answer the question that you had asked.  When you share about yourself, keep it simple, brief and to the point. Remember that the conversation is about your child and their concerns; they have to grow and learn to live their own way.

Occasionally “I do not know” can mean, “the question you asked me is a poor one”, or “I do not understand what you are asking me”.  After you have given your teen a few moments to come up with a better answer and they appear not to understand, clarify your question by asking it in a different way.  Remember to avoid asking “why” questions.  These questions start with “why”, or include only the word “why”.  Often people do not understand why they did something, but just went through an action without a lot of consideration.  When you ask someone “why”, they are often put onto the spot and have to come up with a reason for their act instead of working with you to increase understanding.  A teenager put on the spot is frequently going to say anything that pops into their mind instead of really thinking through what they are being asked; hence, parents often are told, “I don’t know”.

Lastly, “I don’t know” can signify “I do not want to talk to you”, or “I do not want to talk about that subject”.  There are many ways to defuse this situation, including silence with receptive body language, clarifying that you need an answer, and giving an example answer.  An additional way to communicate when told “I don’t know” includes explaining to your teen that you understand that it is a sensitive subject and that you respect that they may not want to talk about it.  You can respect and understand that it is sensitive to them and you will treat them with respect, and offer to talk to them about the subject later or when they are ready, or after you both take a break from the conversation.

As your child uses “I don’t know” to push you away and tell you they do not want to talk to you, explain that your conversation is important and that you want to understand what is happening or are seeking an explanation.  Offer to help them help you, and seek out ways to understand what is happening when they push you away with their words.  Avoid creating a confrontation and an argument because you cannot make them talk to you; getting into an argument works to their advantage to avoid discussing what you are asking.  Recognize when you are getting upset or your teen is trying to get away from the conversation. Be receptive to letting the conversation wait for a better time in order to avoid a fight.  As they keep using “I don’t know” time and again, recover the conversation by explaining to them that you know what it means and that you are trying hard to communicate, respect them, and their opinions.

Talking to your children does not have to feel like a cross-examination, but can instead be satisfying banter.  Remember, “I don’t know” means: “no one has asked that before”; “I really do not know”; “I do not have an answer”; or, “I do not want to talk to you”.  You can try different means to get past the dismay that “I don’t know” causes parents and adults.  Keep your body language receptive and encourage communication with your silence, clarify your question, relate about yourself and explain that you understand them. Following these steps can help you increase communication and fortify the relationship you have with your child.

Personality influences nearly every area of an individual’s life. From relationship satisfaction, career stability and even mortality, the five leading personality traits, known as the Big Five, agreeableness, openness, extraversion, conscientiousness and neuroticism, have been shown to have a direct impact throughout. But a new study suggests that an individual’s personality also influences another important role. “Given the importance of personality for the ways in which people live and experience their lives, it is hardly surprising that personality has been proposed to be related to one of the most central, challenging, and affectively charged tasks that many adults are faced with: namely, parenting,” said  Amaranta D. de Haan, Maja Dekovic´, and Peter Prinzie of Utrecht University, who conducted a study to determine exactly how the personalities of parents and adolescents affect the parenting dynamic. They theorized that outgoing and social parents, high in extraversion, would most likely exhibit positive and highly motivating behaviors with their children, while introverted parents would act more withdrawn and unavailable. Additionally, the team noted that children with difficult temperament who are impulsive and distractible may elicit stricter discipline and negative reactions from their parents.

The researchers interviewed nearly 1500 individuals, including mothers, fathers and adolescents, and assessed their personalities using the Five-Factor Personality Inventory and the Hierarchical Personality Inventory for Children respectively. They looked specifically at warmth and overreactive discipline when they assessed them two years later. They found that overreactivity was influenced more by the personality of the parent rather than the adolescent. But the personality traits of both children and parents impacted the level of warmth. “Associations between parental personality and parenting were similarly related to parents of easy versus difficult adolescents, and for mothers and fathers parenting daughters or sons,” said the team. “Together, results show that parent characteristics as well as adolescent characteristics importantly affect dysfunctional and adaptive parenting.”

Reference:
de Haan, A. D., Deković, M., & Prinzie, P. (2011, August 29). Longitudinal Impact of Parental and Adolescent Personality on Parenting. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology. Advance online publication. doi: 10.1037/a0025254

spanking definitionI am guilty of spanking my children. My oldest has been spanked once, maybe twice, in his entire 17 years. My 7-year-old has received a few prime swats, and other forms of discipline, in her short lifetime. My middle child, a 14-year-old boy, is much more intimately familiar with spankings. As an extremely hyperactive and unruly child, my son was constantly exploring things that were off limits and often dangerous. Undeterred by the threats of toy removal, time-outs, and other nonphysical forms of punishment, he pushed me to my limits and I resorted to the only other method I knew: spanking. At the tender age of 5, he was quite adept at “assuming the position.” He no longer covered his back end with his tiny hands, and as much as it drove me crazy, he developed a stoic resistance and would receive his spanking without so much as a tear.

Was this child abuse? Or was it merely discipline? According to the statutes of my state, Florida, I have not committed child abuse because I did not significantly impair my children’s physical, mental, or emotional health. But if I look at an exception in the same statute, it is not so clear. It reads: “Corporal discipline of a child by a parent does not in itself constitute abuse when it does not result in harm to the child.” So even though I subjected my child—actually, all three of my children—to corporal punishment at one time or another, it is considered abuse only if I harmed them.

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But doesn’t a spanking cause emotional injury? Doesn’t bending over and getting smacked, pretty firmly, on the bottom cause physical pain? Doesn’t this type of action potentially result in a traumatic event for a child who has never been struck by a parent? Did I cause harm?

I don’t know where discipline ends and abuse begins. I know that I was spanked as a child. I know that sometimes I learned the lesson and sometimes I didn’t. But I also know that when I was young, the thought of calling the police and reporting my parents as abusers never even entered my mind, no matter how sore my butt was.

Times changed as I grew up. Cable news outlets expanded, divorces were on the rise, and the stories of children being abused, and others claiming abuse to malign a parent, exploded. As an adult, I became keenly aware of how lucky I was, never having been subjected to horrific physical or mental traumas. My eyes were opened to the fact that what I saw as a form of discipline could be interpreted by some as abuse. I was also very cognizant of the fact that had my parents delivered the punishment out of anger, they could have easily crossed that fine line.

I don’t know where discipline ends and abuse begins. I know that I was spanked as a child. I know that sometimes I learned the lesson and sometimes I didn’t. But I also know that when I was young, the thought of calling the police and reporting my parents as abusers never even entered my mind, no matter how sore my butt was.

I heard members of the media discussing this very topic. They agreed that spanking is an acceptable form of discipline, if done appropriately. They stated that if the punishment is delivered out of anger, as an outlet for frustration and rage, then it is abuse. It is only when the punishment is administered out of love, and with the intention of teaching a child what is right, that it constitutes as discipline and not abuse. But doesn’t the mother who brushes her child’s teeth with steel wool say she does it only to teach her child the importance of dental hygiene? Doesn’t the father who forces his toddler to wear a dirty diaper for two days do so only to help the child become potty-trained?

Children have been spanked for generations. And yes, they have been given alcohol, medicine, and even hot sauce. A relative of mine got hot sauce on her thumb to help her quit sucking it. She ended up crying so hard after she tasted the hot sauce that she rubbed her eyes with the same thumb. The result? Very irritated eyes. But she didn’t lose her eyesight, didn’t call the police, and didn’t suck her thumb again.

I am an extremely fortunate person. I was not abused as a child. I was punished, had pickle juice put on my thumb, was sent to bed with no supper, and was spanked. But I was never beaten. I was never psychologically tortured. I was never burned, locked in a closet, or left hungry for days. And I never, ever had any potentially harmful liquid forced down my throat or got thrown into an ice-cold shower. I could not imagine doing this to any of my children, not matter the circumstances. But mothers, fathers, stepparents, foster parents, and other so-called “guardians” do these things every day to hundreds of thousands of children. And I’d bet that if you asked any one of them why, they would all say the same thing: they did it to teach a lesson; they did it to discipline; they did it out of love.

I’m really glad my parents didn’t love me that much.

Gay teenagers are faced with the same peer pressures as heterosexual teens. But a new study suggests their sexuality can lead them to be at a greater risk for engaging in unhealthy behaviors. According to a study by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), gay, lesbian and bisexual teens were more likely to take part in seven out of the 10 high risk activities, including drinking, smoking, drug use, attempted suicide, violence, weight management, and risky sexual practices. Director of CDC’s Division of Adolescent and School Health (DASH), Howell Wechsler, said, “This report should be a wake-up call for families, schools and communities that we need to do a much better job of supporting these young people. Any effort to promote adolescent health and safety must take into account the additional stressors these youth experience because of their sexual orientation, such as stigma, discrimination and victimization. We are very concerned that these students face such dramatic disparities for so many different health risks.”

The study also took into account the truancy rates of these teens, bullying, nutritional practices and safe sexual activity, specifically condom use. The researchers believe that better school health and public health policies and interventions should be put in place to lower the level of risky behaviors prevalent in this segment of the teen population. They also believe that screenings for high school age students should include information regarding their sexual preference, in order to better monitor health outcomes. (more…)

GoodTherapy | Can My Child Choose Which Parent to Live With? On a fairly regular basis I am asked by a divorced parent how old their child must be before they can choose which parent they want to live with. Many parents tell me their child will be 12 years old, 13 years old, 14 years old soon and will be able to make their own decisions. They appear to be uniformly surprised to learn that a minor child does not have the legal right to decide which parent to live with.

Depending on the jurisdiction in which you live, the age of your child may matter only in terms of the weight a judge might give to a child’s preference, should he or she have one. In general, the older they are the more their preference might be considered. Their preferences are not usually considered in a vacuum, however. It could be that Susie might want to live with Dad because he is more lenient in his rules… He doesn’t make her go to church, let’s her stay out an hour later, doesn’t nag her about homework, etc. Or the preference might be because Mom is supportive of Joey’s desire to be on the soccer team or takes him to his horseback riding lessons or is excited about the dance program he is in. When Mom or Dad uniformly does not support a child’s activities when that activity spans the parenting time of both parents, it is not surprising to a judge that a child might have a preference. However, children rarely know all the details of how a parent decides to do something or what both parents talk about regarding their decisions. Sometimes the decisions are financially impacting one parent differently than the other. The child may only know that Mom or Dad is not taking them where they want to go but not that it is not affordable. Whatever the reason, by early to mid teens, a court is likely to take the child’s concerns into consideration in making an order while being very careful not to ask the child to make a decision and learning as much as possible about the context of that preference.

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Play is serious business!

–Caitlin ‘Cake’ Gateaux

I was asked by the US Play Coalition research committee to collect personal statements about ideas and beliefs that are connected to the question, what is play?

How we define play and its value is shaped by many personal, historical, and cultural influences. Darell Hammond, in his recently published book, KaBOOM! How One Man Built a Movement to Save Play, writes about the reality of a play deficit in our communities. He calls on those of us who recognize the value of play (and there aren’t enough of us out there, he says) to take action steps that will lead to a greater recognition of play’s value while brightening each child’s life and create playful communities for all ages no matter where we live. (more…)

A new article reveals that most teens that struggle with depression do not receive treatment. Each year, almost 2 million teens report having experienced an episode of major depression. However, only 30 percent of them receive treatment for the symptoms of anxiety, sadness, guilt and irritability. The findings were revealed by the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration, in an effort to raise awareness at the severity of mental health issues in children. The study indicated that nearly 15% of teens had considered suicide in the previous twelve months, and the findings hope to help discover which children are at greater risk in order to implement the proper interventions and therapies to prevent injuries and death.

The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention report that 4,400 American adolescents and young adults commit suicide annually, and another 150,000 receive treatment for self-injuries. The Center confirms that the majority of children who take their own lives had a diagnosable and treatable mental health condition and often exhibited symptoms in the months leading up to their suicide. The study also revealed that children who reported symptoms of depression were more likely to engage in addictive and abusive behaviors involving drugs, cigarettes and alcohol. The report targets these children specifically in order so that professionals “can turn a life around and reduce the impact of mental illness and substance abuse on America’s communities,” said Pamela S. Hyde, an administrator for the agency. (more…)

Bullying has become a national epidemic with nearly forty percent of youths admitting to bullying at one time or another. But new research shows that parental behaviors, attitudes and mental health can all influence a child’s potential for bullying. Most parents of children who have been victims of bullying often ask what they can do to protect their children from such harassment. However, new research suggests that the real question to address is how a parent can prevent their child from bullying other children.

Rashmi Shetgiri, MD, FAAP, assistant professor of pediatrics at University of Texas Southwestern Medical Center and Children’s Medical Center, Dallas, and colleagues conducted a survey that identified trends in bullying over a four-year period. They examined the amount of bullying that was reported, and also the additional factors that influenced the rate of bullying. They discovered that the number of children who bullied others rose from 23 percent in 2003 to 35 percent in 2007. Reasons cited for the increase were feelings of neglect or anger felt by the children from their parents. Also, emotional, behavioral and developmental issues were common among children who bullied. And children who reported a mother with mental health challenges showed more potential for becoming a bully. (more…)

Son whispering into father's earConnecting with and creating a stronger relationship with your children starts with listening to them. There are specific skills that a parent can master that can help to show your children that you care. Instead of arguments, listen and show your understanding while maintaining your position. By attending to them and inviting them to talk, you can take steps toward better communication and a great relationship.

Make Sure You Are Paying Attention

Carve time out of your day specifically to communicate with your youngsters, or set aside what you are working on for a few minutes. Make eye contact, turn toward your children, and get as close to their level as both of you are comfortable with. No need to stare.

Be aware that you are talking to another person. How does your body communicate that you are listening? Are your arms crossed, are you pulled away from them, or are you standing over them imposingly? Watch what their body language is saying to you. Use a natural vocal style; your voice often communicates your emotions.

Let Your Kids Start the Conversation

[fat_widget_right]Inviting your children to talk to you is more than just vaguely asking them about their day, feelings, or what happened at school. Give your kids a chance to start the conversation by asking them what they would like to talk about today.

Listen to what they have to say, and remember silence is golden. When you say nothing, it allows them to fill up the space in the conversation with what they want to say and encourages them to keep talking. Give encouragement as they are talking and being open with you.

Remember that you want to be having discussions with your children regularly, not just when they are in trouble. If your children are comfortable talking with you, then even when they are in trouble they should still be comfortable talking with you about their problems. Use simple acknowledgement responses that show you are listening. “I see. Oh. Uh-Huh. Hmmm.”

Identify and Summarize Your Childrens’ Emotions

Listen for and name the feelings you think you hear from what your children are telling you. Respond to the emotions being expressed, and not the content of what is being said when you want to connect emotionally with your kids. How are they saying things? What is their body language? Identify the emotion: “Wow, you are really mad,” or “You are showing me how sad you are.”

When children share their sentiments, they are showing you trust. That trust helps to create a greater sense of connectedness that you and your children can share. Throughout your chat with your children, summarize and paraphrase what you have heard. Do not be a parrot and repeat what you have heard verbatim—just a quick sum of the ideas they are expressing. Providing a rundown of what you heard lets your children know you have been focused on their thoughts and emotions.

By modeling good listening behavior, you can teach your child to pay attention and stay focused during a talk with other people or at school. Remember that you can follow each of these ideas and reinforce the connection that you have with your children.

Father consoles crying boyHearing “I don’t like you!” from your child can hurt, but don’t believe that they really don’t like you. Kids, as young as 2, learn to say “No;” they have their feelings hurt and want to do things their own way. They do not have the cognizance to say, “Mom or Dad, I’m mad because I can’t get my own way at this time, but I understand why you said I can’t do that particular thing.” If only they could!

On You Tube, I saw a video of a 3-year-old that told his mom that he only liked her when she gave him cookies. She listened and acknowledged what he said. She told him it was okay and that she loved him. He said he loved her too but doesn’t always like her. It was cute. If he was a little older, he probably would have said, “I don’t like what you said.”

If your child shouts, “I don’t like you!” in response to not getting his/her way, acknowledge his/ her feelings, remind him/her that it’s okay to not like the decision and remind your child that you love him/her. Though this may not always go smoothly, the more calm and consistent you are, the better.

When children say, “I don’t like you,” you have an opportunity to help them identify feelings and find more words so they can learn to express themselves verbally.

You might say:

Some kids will accept this as sufficient and others won’t. When a child gets more upset or doesn’t like the answer, remain calm and consistent. He/she will be okay. If tantrums become more extreme, continue to remain calm and consistent. It’s difficult, but it is necessary to not give in. You can still acknowledge the feelings briefly, without fully engaging in conversation with your child. Reasoning with a child when he/she has a tantrum is not helpful in decreasing or eliminating the tantrums, in fact, it reinforces them.

You can remind your child that when the nap is done, both of you can play with the toys, go to the park, or do something else.

Remember, kids don’t mean it when they say, “I don’t like you.” It can hurt, but your job as a parent is to raise your child to be able to express the thoughts and feelings he/she has in appropriate ways, be helpful and respectful, and have a strong sense of self-worth.

When you remain calm and consistent as best you can, this will help you both to work through the particular situation and get to having a more fun time easier and faster.

One book that is very helpful is Making Children Mind Without Losing Yours by Dr. Kevin Lehman. Check it out!

Important Notice

GoodTherapy is not intended to be a substitute for professional advice, diagnosis, medical treatment, or therapy. Always seek the advice of your physician or qualified mental health provider with any questions you may have regarding any mental health symptom or medical condition. Never disregard professional psychological or medical advice nor delay in seeking professional advice or treatment because of something you have read on GoodTherapy.