Brian Gilmartin

Professional Life
Brian G. Gilmartin was born on May 18, 1940 in New Jersey, and was raised in Maplewood, near Newark. He studied psychology at the University of Colorado, and received his bachelor’s degree in 1962. He went on to earn his master’s in psychology in 1965 from the University of Utah. Gilmartin graduated from the University of Iowa in 1976 with a Ph.D. in Sociology, specializing in the study of family and marriage relationships. Gilmartin joined the staff at Humboldt State University as an assistant professor. He left Arcata, California to move to Westfield, Massachusetts in 1980, when he took a position as an assistant professor at Westfield State College. Gilmartin also taught at several other universities throughout the 1970’s and 1980’s, including California State Polytechnic, Auburn University, and Virginia Polytechnic Institute and State University. He also counseled students in psychology during his career.

Gilmartin has held the position of associate professor at Montana State University – Northern since 1988. He continues to research and study fields of interest, including neuropsychology of personality, the impact of dog ownership on family dynamics, and sexual spouse sharing. He is best known for his theory of Love Shyness and has published several studies and books on the subject.

Contribution to Psychology
The theory of love-shyness describes a condition of extreme shyness that inhibits the development of successful and thriving intimate relationships. Gilmartin believes that people with love shyness are unable to take assertive actions and necessary measures to initiate courtship or engage in romantic behaviors. Other psychological problems may contribute to this issue, such as social anxiety, that can severely hinder one’s ability to engage in conversations with people of the opposite sex. However, many experts believe that love shyness can be present in the absence of other issues, specifically if it affects intimacy alone. Love shyness is categorized as a phobia, but with proper treatment, can be managed to improve the quality of one’s life through the establishment of healthy intimate relationships. Additionally, some psychologists believe that an avoidant personality can contribute to love shyness. It has been compared to erotophobia, although that phobia is a much more focused condition that affects specific and isolated areas of relationship interactions, whereas love shyness encompasses a broader spectrum of symptoms.

Gilmartin, who developed the phrase love-shyness, believes that 1.5% of men in the United States suffer from the issue, so much so that they never marry or engage in healthy sexual relationships. Gilmartin’s theory has been criticized, specifically because it only focuses on the issues of men and fails to address similar problems in women. However, Gilmartin continues to advocate for young men afflicted with love-shyness throughout the world.