
Counseling, Marriage & Family Therapy
I'm a licensed professional.
LMHC - 000512
An issue that has particularly widespread importance that I focus on is related to self care or treatment of oneself. Many people I've worked with over the years are self critical, harsh with themselves, or hard on themselves. Many of us received parenting that essentially implied that we need to "put our noses to the grindstone" to get "results" from ourselves. What often happens though, is this harshness creates an inner tightness, a rigidness with ourselves, and significant lack of self acceptance. What we often miss is that it's through accepting ourselves, being compassionate toward ourselves, speaking to ourselves with kindness that produces the most change. As a therapist, I pay attention to the level of caring self talk, the ability to soothe, calm or ground that my client is at. I can model that, point out ways to enhance gentle behavior toward oneself, and reflect back the unique inner qualities that my client may not see or may only see dimly. How we treat and talk to ourselves is essential in healing and empowering ourselves with behaviors that better meet our needs. I find that mindfulness practice greatly impacts personal change, defined as paying attention on purpose to our immediate experience without judgment. Mindfulness can build resilience, open possibility, and expand your perspectives in ways that enrich your life.
Unfortunately, someone who has had a negative experience with therapy may likely not seek it out again, especially if it was their first time. There are many reasons a bad experience can happen. The most benign is that there was not a good match between client and therapist. Having been a client on a number of occasions in my own life, I've had healing and greatly positive experiences and a few downright damaging ones. I would encourage anyone considering therapy to keep a few things in mind. Trust your gut from the time you have a first contact with the therapist through the time you're meeting with this person. Ask questions when you first talk with them and see how they respond. Are they respectful? Do they listen well? Do they welcome questions about how they're working with you? Do you feel cared about and warmly received? Does the therapist indicate knowledge and wisdom about the issues and challenges you bring to therapy? Remind yourself that if you're not able to discuss issues and get questions answered, or if you have an overall sense of discomfort, you have the wrong therapist for YOU. A therapist can be skilled at their work but may not be a good fit for you. I ask potential clients to make a commitment to themselves to seek growth and change, that may or may not include me. In other words, if I am not the right therapist for you, I hope you will not abandon your quest for working out your challenges.
Office 1:
1850 Central Avenue Colonie New York
Albany, NY 12205 United States
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