Irina Banfi-Mare, Psy.D.

Is change possible? Absolutely, but insight alone rarely makes a dramatic and lasting difference. Therapy with me is not just a band aid. I will work with you to know what your goals are, identify the ways that fit your personality to meet those goals, and will track progress with you. There is no confusion about why we are doing what we are doing in sessions. Therapy is your process and the more you "own" it, the more helpful it is. It's crucial to be willing to ask for what you want and to say when something is not working for you. I will help you build skills to last a lifetime, so that you not only feel better, but actually get better! I see my role as a therapist to help you lessen suffering, but also to increase your happiness. I actively seek to identify, emphasize, and build your strengths and values, to encourage active engagement in rewarding activities, and the exploration of a sense of purpose and meaning in life. I have trained in a variety of therapies and am primarily informed by humanistic-existential, cognitive-behavioral, and psychodynamic approaches in my work. I consider various possible contributing elements to a problem (biological, psychological, cultural, interpersonal) and pay particular attention to the connection between emotional and physical health. I emphasize the human capacity for growth, change, and self-determination when dealing with adversity.

Having specific goals for therapy significantly increases the chance of getting where you want to go quickly and without wasting time. I practice outcome-informed treatment, which means I regularly track therapeutic progress and your satisfaction with therapy so that you can get the most out of every session. In addition to verbal feedback, I use two brief questionnaires (four items each) to assess progress in therapy. I do not contract directly with any insurance companies, but I would gladly provide a statement of services that you can submit to your insurance in order to obtain out-of-network reimbursement. There are a variety of reasons why you may choose not to use insurance, and I would be happy to discuss those with you. Please visit my website for more information and to view a brief introductory video.

Therapy involves building emotional intelligence. By this I mean awareness of emotions, identification of emotions, comfort with emotions, management of emotions, and communication of emotions. Often people have difficulty with some of these aspects and have developed unhealthy or ineffective ways of dealing with their feelings (stuffingignoring or explodinglashing out). I work with clients on increasing emotional intelligence so that they can use their emotions in a way that is understandable, comfortable, and helpful to reach their goals. We all suffer in life and it is important to find meaning in that suffering, otherwise it is pointless and leads to helplessness, hopelessness, and despair. Such feelings keep us feeling stuck, resentful, weak and victimized. I can help you process current or past suffering in order to move forward in your life with a greater sense of understanding, strength, and purpose. Suffering does not have to be senseless or permanent; it can be an opportunity for growth, wisdom, and increased compassion for oneself and others.

If you are ambivalent about starting therapy, I would encourage you to gather information about therapy from various sources (people you know, online, books, etc.) so that you have some idea of what to expect. Not all therapists are alike, just as not all physicians or dentists are alike. You may have to try out several different therapists before you discover a good fit. A good fit is essential and you should be able to know within just a few sessions if that fit will be helpful to you. There are also different approaches to therapy (both regarding understanding of problems and in techniques used) and some will be more helpful to you. Visit my website and take a look at some of my short videos to see if my style seems like a good fit for you. Remember, it takes courage and strength to seek therapy. Ask yourself, "Do the potential benefits outweigh the costs of making no change?"