Rocky Lewis, LMFT, LPCC, Life Coach

Self defeating thoughts, beliefs, and behaviors. Been there, done that. Before I went into therapy, I had no "Inner Coach", no "positive, supportive voice", only a negative, critical voice which screamed "you can't! you can't! you can't!" ad nauseum--literally. It was through Psychotherapy that I learned how to combat that voice, how to stop those negative thoughts and replace them with thoughts of confidence and self worth, happiness and success. Through Psychotherapy, I developed my own "Inner Coach" who has fought that negative, self defeating person on my left shoulder with stronger, positive thoughts and comments. And eventually, with some work and practice, that negative, self critical voice is gone! And my Coach and I are now one! I use voice dialogue work frequently in my practice when a client is struggling with self-negativity, self-doubt, and "I can't-ness" I use my past experiences to help the client overcome similar experiences in order to learn to be their own "Inner Coach" and achieve balance, happiness, and success.

I believe in Freud's idea of "the talking cure", that just by talking about a problem, by hearing it all said out loud to a neutral and non-judgmental person, the healing begins. For me, it was like vomiting out all this "toxic stuff" that had built up in me since my adolescent years: negative, all-or-nothing thinking, catastrophizing, self rejecting "stuff." It had taken on a life of it's own. It was like it was forcing me to examine it, deal with, or suffer the consequences. For me, just by talking about it all allowed me to see the reality, the truth of myself, how and why I was sabotaging my world. Talking to my therapist allowed me to gain clarity and insight into myself, my behaviors, and the unconscious motivations. Just by talking with a non-judgmental person gave me the opportunity to learn new ways of thinking and behaving, which led to new ways of feeling, particularly about my self. Psychotherapy helped rid me of all that toxic thinking I had engaged in. It provided a "spigot" that allowed it all to run out and leave me open to positivity and self acceptance. It provided me a safe place to examine and explore my thoughts and feelings not only of others, but of myself as well. Therapy was a safe environment in which I could reveal my true thoughts and feelings and not be judged or condemned, where I could learn to make better informed decisions about how I wanted to be. That is what I strive to provide for my clients.