Deryl Goldenberg, PhD

My approach begins with a real conversation that builds on itself to create rapport and trust with the individual or couple so that we can feel comfortable while talking about difficult and challenging personal matters. I am curious to find out what specifically the person or couple came to therapy for? What are they curious about, wanting to explore or change or confront in themselves or their relationship? We then flesh this out, to get a fuller and more detailed picture of their issues. We formulate 1, 2 or 3 priorities to focus. My therapeutic approach involves a psycho-dynamic and emotion focused approach, that sets out to understand the source of the problem, how it developed and how it's being habitually maintained? From here we begin to develop creative strategies on how to address and interrupt these patterns and replace them with healthier ways of being? I am particularly interested in accessing the individual'scouple's habitual ways of thinking, feeling and behaving that reinforces the very problems and patterns that they want to change. This provides us with an experiential understanding and knowing of how they have come to be where they are. We are then much better equipped to address their emotional triggers and negative feedback loops (blaming communication-patterns). We work together to develop a deeper more vulnerable way for the individualcouple to talk and listen to one another, a more reliable and skillful means of relating from themselves to their loved ones. As the therapy progresses the individual or members of a couple learn to find their courage and trust in the process to confront 'old deep hurts and angers,' within themselves or their relationship, and learn how to more constructively navigate these troubled areas.

I have worked for over 25 years in private practice with individuals and couples My areas of focus have been Couples, and Male Psychology. Being in a couples relationship is the most challenging psychological work we do; extremely complex and challenging to combine friendship and sexuality between a man and a woman (or any two consulting adults), and keeping it emotionally close and alive ain't easy, but so worth learning how to do. Men's Psychology has always interested me, because I am a man and have since reaching my 20's been interested in what other men experienced -- their childhood wounds and cultural conditioning, struggles maintaining intimacy with the women in their lives, and their relationship to meaningful work and money. I like helping men confront their areas of concern or struggle in their work or love life, and guide them in developing the skills and emotional courage to face and resolve relationship difficulties and work issues.