Starting therapy can come with a lot of pressure.
For some people, the pressure comes from not knowing what to expect in a first session. For others, it comes from the fear of being judged, misunderstood, or told how they should be able to handle things on their own. And for many, it comes from a quieter thought that can be even harder to shake: Shouldn’t I be able to do this by myself?
In her Member Spotlight interview, Annette Popernik offers a perspective that feels both grounding and deeply human. She introduces therapy as a conversation where safety is built, and where clients are both validated and challenged. It is a space designed not just to comfort, but to help people better understand themselves and move forward with greater clarity.
What makes Annette’s approach especially meaningful is the care she brings to helping people feel fully themselves in the room. Fluent in English, Spanish, and Italian, she places real importance on both cultural and linguistic awareness in her practice. She encourages clients to express themselves in the language that feels most natural to them, even if that means bringing in words she may need to learn along the way. For Annette, that is part of creating a space where people feel safe, understood, and true to who they are.
That philosophy carries through everything she shared in our conversation: therapy should not feel like a place where you have to perform, translate yourself, or arrive with everything figured out. It should feel like a place where you can begin honestly, be met with care, and explore what growth might look like from there.
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Video Interview: Watch the Conversation with Annette PopernikWatch Annette Popernik’s Member Spotlight interview. |
What should someone know before starting therapy?
Annette describes therapy as a conversation where a safe space is built and where the client is both validated and challenged. That balance is central to her approach. Therapy is not about giving people all the answers. It is about supporting them in a way that helps them reflect more honestly, understand themselves more clearly, and move forward with intention.
For someone starting therapy for the first time, that can be reassuring. You do not need the perfect explanation for why you are there. You do not need to arrive certain about what you feel or what you need. Sometimes, the first step is simply entering a space where the conversation can begin.
Why do people feel like they should handle everything alone?
One of the most relatable parts of Annette’s interview is what she says about the pressure people place on themselves before they ever seek support. She points to the “should” statements many clients carry: I should be able to do this on my own. This should not be a problem. I should have figured this out already.
These thoughts may sound small, but they carry real weight. They can make ordinary struggles feel shameful and turn the need for support into something that feels like failure.
Annette offers a gentler alternative. Therapy can be a place where internal pressures are examined instead of being obeyed. It can help people stop measuring themselves against what they think they should be able to handle and start paying attention to what they need.
Can therapy help even if nothing feels wrong?
Absolutely.
Annette speaks openly about the value of therapy for self-improvement and personal growth, even when life seems fine on the surface. She also makes a simple but powerful point: “…there is something meaningful about having a space where someone is focused entirely on you, what you need, and what is going on in your life.”
That expands the role of therapy in an important way. It does not have to be reserved for crisis, conflict, or burnout. It can also be a place for insight, reflection, and self-care. A place to understand your patterns more clearly. A place to check in with yourself more honestly. A place to build awareness before things become overwhelming.
That perspective is valuable for therapy seekers who may wonder whether their concerns are serious enough, and just as meaningful for therapists who want to show that their work supports not only pain, but also growth.
Why does finding the right therapist matter?
Annette highlights the importance of establishing a connection between the therapist and the client. She sees the relationship between therapist and client as one of the strongest predictors of positive outcomes. That is why finding the right therapist is more than expertise alone. It is also about whether they understand the different layers that shape your life.
She encourages people to look for a therapist who can make space for:
- Cultural background and lived experience
- Spirituality or religion, if it matters to the client
- Chronic pain or disability, when these shape the client’s daily life
- The personal context behind anxiety, grief, relationships, and other challenges
What stands out in Annette’s approach is that she values human connection without making assumptions. Shared identity can help, but real support comes from taking the time to understand each person’s individually lived experiences.
Why do language and cultural awareness matter in therapy?
One of the most distinctive parts of Annette’s practice is the importance she gives to cultural and linguistic awareness. Fluent in English, Spanish, and Italian, she is intentional about creating room for people to express themselves in the language that feels most natural to them.
That matters more than it may seem at first.
People do not always think, feel, or process in perfectly translated language. Sometimes the right word only exists in the language spoken at home. Sometimes a phrase carries emotional meaning that does not fully come through in English. Annette makes space for that. Even when a client uses a word she does not know yet, she is willing to learn it so that the person in front of her does not have to filter themselves to be understood.
This part of her approach offers an important reminder for both therapy seekers and therapists. Feeling safe in therapy is not only about emotional warmth. It is also about being able to show up in ways that feel culturally real and personally natural. The more room there is for that authenticity, the more possible trust becomes.
How can virtual therapy feel safer and more supportive?
Annette also offers a thoughtful perspective on virtual therapy. Instead of seeing it as a lesser version of in-person care, she encourages people to think about how to make it work for them. Her advice is simple: create a space that feels safe.
That could mean settling in with a cup of tea or coffee, a pillow, fuzzy socks, a candle, or anything else that helps your body and mind feel more at ease. In Annette’s view, the physical environment around you matters. When you create a space that feels calm and comforting, that sense of safety can carry into the session itself.
She also points out that virtual therapy offers something unique. In an office or any physical setting, the space is already defined. The room looks the way it is. Nothing much can be done about the walls, the furniture, the setting in which the session takes place. But in virtual therapy, there is more room to shape the environment around your own needs and preferences. That can make the experience feel more inviting, more personal, and more supportive.
What does it mean to grow through therapy?
What stands out most in Annette’s interview is how she does not describe therapy as only soothing or only solution focused. Instead, she sees it as a place where people can be validated while also being challenged.
That distinction matters.
Being validated means your experience is taken seriously. Being challenged means you are not left exactly where you are. Together, those two things create conditions for growth. They allow therapy to feel supportive without becoming passive, and honest without becoming harsh.
For therapy seekers, this offers a helpful way to think about what good therapy can feel like. For therapists, it is a strong reminder that care and accountability can work together in the room.
You do not need to have everything figured out
At the heart of Annette’s interview is a simple but lasting idea: you do not need to have everything figured out before you begin. Therapy can be a place where you let go of some of the pressure to manage everything alone, speak in the words that feel true to you, and explore what support, insight, and growth might look like on your own terms.
Her perspective reminds us that the right therapeutic space is not one where you have to shrink yourself to fit in. It is one where you can feel safe enough to be honest and supported enough to keep evolving.
If Annette’s words resonated with you, explore her GoodTherapy profile to learn more about her approach. If you are still looking for the right fit, browse GoodTherapy’s therapist directory to find a provider whose style, perspective, and approach align with your needs.
FAQs
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It’s human nature to want to feel validated in your feelings and experiences, and therapy is a great avenue for feeling understood. Yet, our unique perspectives, cultures, and outlooks often impact our emotions and struggles, which means therapy must also be personal. Culturally competent therapists better understand the qualities and identifiers that make you unique, such as race, gender, sexual orientation, religion, and more. Below, we dive into the importance of culturally competent counseling and how you can take advantage of it.
Read More: Not Sure How to Get Started on Your Therapy Journey?
Cultural Competence Explained
You might feel like other people don’t understand your values, beliefs, or experiences. This is where cultural considerations come in. Cultural competence is a set of knowledge, skills, and attitudes that someone, like a mental health provider, can apply to effectively respond to and work with people with diverse backgrounds.
When used appropriately, cultural competence has a place in nearly every industry, from healthcare to education to business to social work. In therapy, a culturally competent therapist can be key in helping you feel safe and supported, especially when sharing vulnerable feelings or emotions. For some people, culturally competent care might mean understanding experiences through a lens of race or sexuality. For others, it might mean considering regional background or spoken language during care. Regardless of your unique identifiers, these elements can impact your communication approaches, attachment styles, triggers, and emotional responses.
Read More: The Relationship Between Culture and Communication Is Closer Than You Think
Why Culturally Sensitive Therapy Matters
Your therapist’s main goal is to help you feel validated, understood, and equipped to manage your emotions with the right tools. Culturally competent therapy means providing an added level of consideration and context to your sessions. Every person’s experiences are different, but below are some examples of what culturally sensitive care might look like:
- When your therapist seeks to understand terms and words you use from your culture that are not considered Standard English
- Helping you unpack microaggressions you’ve experienced because of your race or sexuality
- Validating your perspective on a topic through the lens of your gender expression
- Discussing what a mental health condition means to you, depending on your religion or culture
How Intersectionality Meets Therapy
People’s emotional or difficult experiences can be layered and involve more than one element of identity – this is called “intersectionality.†Understanding intersectionality is important for both you and your therapist because acknowledging people’s unique identifiers and experiences promotes improved policies, health approaches, self-care practices, and resources. There are many examples of intersectionality and how that relates to mental health, but the following are just a few examples:
- You might be feeling like your coworkers are treating you unfairly because of your race. You might also be afraid to speak up to your manager because you’re a woman and assume it’s better if you stay quiet. Your identities as a black person and a woman blend together to create this unique experience.
- You are a trans woman in college who is also Muslim and wears a hijab to cover your hair because of your religious beliefs. You might feel uncomfortable at school because some classmates tease you for wearing a hijab and also misgender you often. Your identities as a trans woman and a Muslim person impact your personal challenges in this setting.
Finding a culturally competent therapist who understands you on multiple levels is crucial to helping you address your layered mental health needs and feel safe during your sessions. The right therapist will talk you through different self-reflection practices to address your unique identities and backgrounds. When choosing a therapist, be sure you ask them their areas of expertise, test out how you feel when you unpack certain topics with them, and ask meaningful questions during the initial intake sessions to be sure you can build an effective relationship.Â
Read More: Not Sure How to Find the Right Therapist? Start Here With Three Steps.
GoodTherapy Makes Finding Your Ideal Therapist EasyÂ
Finding a therapist you trust can be difficult, but GoodTherapy makes it easier. Our search filters help you find professionals who understand your background and apply culturally competent care to your conversations. Simply filter your search with information like:
- LocationÂ
- Treatment type
- Telehealth or treatment center
- Therapist speciality
Plus, you can use our Therapy for BIPOC Individuals page to find a therapist who understands your different layers and experiences. We’re committed to providing inclusive resources for BIPOC individuals to get the help they deserve.
Getting the help you deserve doesn’t have to be complicated. Our licensed, highly-rated professionals are prepared to offer you personalized, culturally-informed care so you can be the best version of yourself.
Read More: Not Sure Which Type of Therapist Is Best for You? Explore Your OptionsÂ