My Approach to Helping
I want to know what brings a smile to your face as you realize there is life to be lived. Our relationship is in the service of real, lasting change that will come from collaboration based on trust.
There is a part in you, that know exactly why it came here and what is the task at hand.
I like to ask my clients early in our work? "How will you know that you received what you came for?" We re-visit this question until one day we both know the work is done.
While I will be keenly interested in how your past has brought you here, we will not dwell there. I am much more interested in what's present for you now and how the best in you can unfold.
The change that will revitalize your life will not come from insight alone. We will engage in dialogue, storytelling, relaxation, imagery, dream exploration, and pay attention to body sensation, the seat of the soul.
I am multifaceted by nature. A trained musician and composer, a highly regarded software designer, an experienced sailor, a resident and student of many international cultures, a life-long and committed spiritual practitioner, and a loving, happy father and husband.
I am an associate of the Milton H. Erickson Institute of the Bay Area and a member of CAMFT.
Specific Issue(s) I'm Skilled at Helping With
Life transitions. Loss of meaning. Spiritual confusion. Marriage and relationships.
How Psychotherapy Can Help
By helping inner parts claim their voice and space and resolving inner conflicts and restoring hope.
My View on the Purpose of Psychotherapy
live better through greater awareness.
What I Love about Being a Psychotherapist
Meeting people and helping them help themselves.
My Role as a Therapist
Like a midwife or a sounding board.
HOW DO I LISTEN?
Listen to others?
As if everyone were my Master
Speaking to me
(“The Gift” – versions of Hafiz by Daniel Ladinsky)
My Therapy Focus
Did the Rose
Ever open its heart
And give to this world
I felt the encouragement of light
We all remain
What I Usually Need to Know to Help
What do they love.
My Guiding Ethical Principles
Respect boundaries. Be aware of the right time. Be of service to my clients.
On the Fence About Going to Therapy?
Until one is committed
there is hesitancy, the chance to draw back,
Concerning all acts of initiative (and creation),
there is one elementary truth,
the ignorance of which kills countless ideas
and splendid plans:
that the moment one definitely commits oneself,
then Providence moves too.
All sorts of things occur to help one
that would never otherwise have occurred.
A whole stream of events issues from the decision,
raising in one's favor all manner
of unforeseen incidents and meetings
and material assistance,
which no man could have dreamt
would have come his way.
I have learned a deep respect
for one of Goethe's couplets:
"Whatever you can do, or dream you can, begin it.
Boldness has genius, power and magic in it. "
W. H. Murray
The Scottish Himalayan Expedition
Had a Negative Therapy Experience?
If I were able to live my life anew,
In the next I would try to commit more errors.
I would not try to be so perfect, I would relax more.
I would be more foolish than I’ve been,
In fact, I would take few things seriously.
I would be less hygienic.
I would run more risks,
take more vacations,
contemplate more sunsets,
climb more mountains, swim more rivers.
I would go to more places where I’ve never been,
I would eat more ice cream and fewer beans,
I would have more real problems and less imaginary ones.
I was one of those people that lived sensibly
and prolifically each minute of his life;
Of course I had moments of happiness.
If I could go back I would try
to have only good moments.
Because if you didn’t know, of that is life made:
only of moments; Don’t lose the now.
I was one of those that never
went anywhere without a thermometer,
a hot-water bottle,
an umbrella, and a parachute;
If I could live again, I would travel lighter.
If I could live again,
I would begin to walk barefoot from the beginning of spring
and I would continue barefoot until autumn ends.
I would take more cart rides,
contemplate more dawns,
and play with more children,
If I had another life ahead of me.
But already you see, I am 85,
and I know that I am dying.
Jorge Luis Borges
Important Factors for Choosing a Therapist
Chemistry - trust your intuition
How My Own Struggles Made Me a Better Therapist
Theoretical Influences that Guide My Work
All theory is for the comfort of the therapist.
I am inspired by Milton Erickson, Carl Jung and Thomas Moore to name a few.
What I Say to People Concerned about the Therapy Process