My Approach to Helping
Are you struggling with self-criticism, excessive worry thoughts, overwhelmed by problems? These are some of the signs of anxiety and depression. You are thinking about asking for support for some of the things you are struggling with. Good for you! This is a sign of strength. Together we can take a look at the things that have held you back in the past and work through them. Connecting with a therapist can provide you with non-judgmental, empathetic feedback that helps you gain insight into ineffective thoughts and behaviors that are holding you back from living the life you want. I can help you learn the skills to increase your ability to ask for what you need, observe your limits and say no to what you don't want, and set better boundaries in your relationships.
More Info About My Practice
I began my work in this field counseling rape survivors. I continue to provide support for that population, plus a wide range of others that deal with a variety of issues such as anxiety, depression, procrastination, relationship conflict, addictions, borderline personality disorder.
How Psychotherapy Can Help
You are so brave for reaching out for support! Sometimes we need to have that impartial, non-judgmental person. This provides us with empathetic feedback that allows us to gain insight into negative thoughts, self-criticism, procrastination, and fears. Taking that first step is hard but it gets easier as you go.
My View on the Nature of 'Disorders'
Something that comes up frequently in practice is shame around the diagnosis of Borderline Personality Disorder. People worry that they are somehow damaged. That is the farthest thing from the truth! Someone diagnosed with Borderline feels emotions intensely. They feel a great deal of hurt for others who are hurting. They can feel misjudged and without a voice which can make them reactive. The diagnosis is nothing more than a label for a certain set of behaviors.
Everyone has behaviors, we learn them in response to our environment. There are not many people who have not learned a behavior when they were growing up - think of brushing your teeth, a common behavior that helps us avoid painful consequences. Behaviors that are ineffective might look like a child insisting on having a cookie before dinner and a mother resisting until the child screams and then gives in. The child then learns that if they scream for something they want, they might get it. A behavior that is reinforced will reoccur. However, behaviors that may have served in the past no longer serve in the present. As an adult, if you scream at someone because they are not giving you what you want, there can be painful consequences. This can be disruptive to work situations (getting fired) romantic relationships (breakups), friendships, family, road rage, even on the phone with customer service.
The good news is that behaviors learned can be unlearned. It takes work and commitment, but it frees you to live your life to the fullest!