My Approach to Helping
The ability to love and feel loved is a basic human need. The need for emotional connection begins at birth and continues throughout our lives. Feeling emotionally secure is vital to our sense of safety and security. It allows us to go out and explore and enjoy our world.
In adults, romantic love can only be truly enjoyed when partners are able to form a strong emotional bond. This bond tells us that when we need them, our partners will be available to us and respond to us with kindness and comfort. Availability and responsiveness make us feel like we matter, that we are valued and that it?s safe to trust in others. And it allows us to be vulnerable and express our deepest feelings.
Emotionally focused therapy is an approach that explores our need for intimate connection and how to create closeness and security that will last a lifetime. It explores the ineffective patterns of interaction or communication that cause us to disconnect, by exploring the underlying emotions that create them. When couples can identify these patterns and understand their emotions on a deeper level, they are able to respond to one another with empathy and compassion. As they re-connect emotionally, they are able to create a more secure and satisfying bond.
Emotionally focused couples therapy is a research-based model of therapy. Success rates are reported at about 75%. This includes issues that range from poor communication to infidelity.
EFT has also be found to be effective in working with individuals. What children learn from their relationships during early childhood development influences their ability to create secure adult relationships. EFT helps to explore internal conflicts by exploring attachment issues that may be influencing one's ability to trust in themselves and in other relationships.