My Approach to Helping
Are most days a struggle? Heteroflexible Therapy is there to help. Whether you struggle with relationships, addictions, dealing with the loss of a loved one, or past issues of abuse we will work together to meet your personal goals. The practice offers a warm and accepting environment for individuals and couples.
Therapy has the best chance of a positive outcome when there is a "good fit" between the client and the therapist. A 30 minute consultation is offered at no charge so that you and the therapist can determine whether you feel comfortable working together. Please call or email to set up a time convenient to your schedule.
Heteroflexible Therapy, Ltd is an open and affirming practice for straight, lesbian, gay, bisexual, queer, and transgender individuals. I work with adults, couples, and families and am open and affirming of alternative life styles and love relationships.
Connie Studer, M.A., LMFT, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, is skilled at recognizing the most effective therapy approach to help you find more satisfaction and joy in life. You are unique and the issues you face are unique. After the initial intake sessions we will work together to prepare a treatment plan with your personal goals for therapy defined. Periodically we will evaluate your progress toward meeting those goals. For some clients therapy will be brief; for others therapy may be more long term. In our practice we are skilled in several therapeutic approaches so that you can be assured that the most effective treatment for your issues will be available.
Most relationships are imbalanced in certain areas, leading to recurring power struggles and arguments. Areas such as sexual frequency, financial matters, and child-rearing are common conflict areas. It can be useful to explore these conflicts and imbalances with the aid of a relatively unbiased observer.In couples counseling the relationship is the client.
Certain power struggles and cooperative dynamics may have become so habitual or automatic in an intimate relationship that the individuals within the relationship may have learned to simply "settle," accepting areas of chronic dissatisfaction within the relationship as "the way things are." The therapist draws the couple's attention to various patterns underlying stubborn conflicts without taking sides or laying blame. Since clients in couples counseling are encouraged to understand their individual issues as they relate to couple dynamics, supplemental individual therapy is sometimes suggested as a means to maximize and accelerate couples work.
Same sex couples
Relationships are difficult. They take work. Are you and your partner finding that you are not as connected as you once were? Are you finding that sex is not as fulfilling or that you have lost the intimate connection you desire? Perhaps you are merging families and want to learn how to integrate two families into one? Connie Studer is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist and is skilled at working with couples to enhance their relationships however they define them; open, monogamous, or polyamorous.
Preparation for Commitment
You have chosen the person with whom you expect to spend the rest of your life. Perhaps you are planning a wedding or a commitment ceremony. What can you do to prepare yourselves as a couple for a future of love, support, and fulfillment?
A course in marriage/commitment preparation (Prepare/Enrich) has been shown to help couples gain skills that will be necessary in the years to come.
You will learn skills to help you as a couple with:
* Stress, including wedding stress
* Conflict resolution
* Financial management
* Sex and affection
* Children and parenting
Adult Survivors of Childhood Sexual Abuse and Trauma
It is important to work on trauma resolution in a safe environment with a therapist skilled in trauma resolution. When you do this work you will likely find that you are able to have more honest and trusting love relationships in your life. With a combination of talk therapy and EMDR in a safe and non-judgmental environment clients have been able to gain a sense of calm and security in their lives.
Substance Dependency and Relapse Prevention
You are making an important step toward recovery from substance abuse/dependency. We realize that no one wakes up and decides to become an alcoholic/addict. For most, there are issues in our lives that are so painful we need to do something to deaden the pain. In our work we will begin by concentrating on recovery and relapse prevention then we will work on uncovering and dealing with the issues that led to addiction.
Whether you are wondering if you may be transgender or are planning to transition, research shows that having a trained therapist is important to assist you on your journey. We will work together to investigate options available to you. It is important that all of your health care professionals communicate and work together to help you reach your personal goals. Connie Studer understands the steps needed to change genders and will work with you to define your health care team.
Coming out process
How do I tell my family, friends, spouse, and co-workers? Will they embrace me or reject me? These are very difficult questions and oftentimes it makes sense to have a trained professional to help you through the process. As a therapist who works in family systems, Connie understands the struggles and the risks of coming out. Therapy generally starts with the individual and then incorporates family sessions to facilitate communication and hopefully acceptance.