{"id":7116,"date":"2010-09-07T14:54:24","date_gmt":"2010-09-07T21:54:24","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.goodtherapy.org\/blog\/?p=7116"},"modified":"2024-03-21T17:48:52","modified_gmt":"2024-03-21T21:48:52","slug":"trauma-impact-relationships-psychology-love-communication","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.goodtherapy.org\/blog\/trauma-impact-relationships-psychology-love-communication\/","title":{"rendered":"Trauma’s Impact on Relationships: Part II"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"GoodTherapyCommunication and trust are key ingredients in any relationship, yet are often negatively impacted by the effects of a traumatic<\/a> experience.<\/p>\n

Trust<\/strong>
\nThe very nature of trauma can shatter an individual\u2019s trust in the world and fellow human beings. A survivor\u2019s reduced level of trust can also make communicating difficult and even damage the foundational fabric of a relationship. Many a survivor believes, \u201cI once trusted and I got hurt, therefore I will protect myself by never trusting again.\u201d After trauma, the world and people in general can seem to be completely unpredictable. Danger seems to be everywhere and so a survivor of trauma may feel that they can never put their guard down in order to relax, feel safe, or trust.<\/p>\n

These false beliefs about the world\u2014that no one, including oneself, is worthy of trust and that one can never be safe\u2014can be clung to and reinforce each other. Unfortunately, these beliefs are often expressed via impulsive, mean, or aggressive behaviors towards the people closest to the survivor. While the individual may often feel self-hatred or shame<\/a> for acting in harsh and distrusting manners, to discuss the reality of these behaviors and the impulsiveness and fear behind them would require open communication<\/a> that may be difficult or impossible at the time.<\/p>\n

Listening and Communication<\/strong>
\nSurvivors of traumatic events often struggle with both expressing themselves and listening actively. Active listening requires a certain amount of concentration and can be made more difficult by the presence of\u00a0 hypervigilance<\/a>. After experiencing trauma, most people\u2019s concentration levels are lower and their levels of hypervigilance higher than their pre-trauma baseline. It can be difficult, if not impossible, for survivors of trauma to process significant chunks of information, making complex or lengthy conversations a significant challenge.<\/p>\n

In addition to a potential decline in listening abilities, people who have experienced a traumatic event often shy away from openly communicating. Open and forthcoming communication may be avoided for two types of reasons:<\/p>\n