![\"Photo](\"https:\/\/www.goodtherapy.org\/blog\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/01\/laughing-young-person-in-nature-e1485450187306-300x200.jpg\" "\\"\\"")
Unfortunately, all too often, I speak to people who struggle with their self-image. For the purpose of being entirely transparent, I sometimes do, too.<\/p>\nUnfortunately, all too often, I speak to people who struggle with their self-image. For the purpose of being entirely transparent, I sometimes do, too.<\/p>\n
Here are things that sometimes surface in my conversations with others:<\/p>\n
I saw a clip of the Today Show<\/em> recently where they offered two women makeovers during an \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Ambush Makeover\u00e2\u20ac\u009d segment. One of the women was incredibly excited (it was her 50th birthday), and she was thrilled with the results of her \u00e2\u20ac\u0153reveal.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d The other woman expressed trepidation and stated she was more nervous than excited. The show\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s staff assured her they\u00e2\u20ac\u2122d take care of her.<\/p>\n [fat_widget_right]<\/p>\n Upon seeing herself in the mirror afterward, and after the hosts exclaimed how gorgeous she looked, that woman calmly said \u00e2\u20ac\u0153I like it\u00e2\u20ac\u009d and then \u00e2\u20ac\u0153My mom will like it\u00e2\u20ac\u009d in a measured way, as though that was purportedly the correct response. Though she smiled broadly, it didn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t appear she was as ecstatic as the hosts. I got the feeling she might be eager to wash off the fa\u00c3\u00a7ade, that perhaps she never believed she needed a makeover in the first place. It was slightly awkward to watch because it drove home the notion one \u00e2\u20ac\u0153should\u00e2\u20ac\u009d want to present as aesthetically pleasing to others, even when one is perfectly content with being exactly as they are.<\/p>\n Often, what we truly perceive as beautiful is not what is traditionally externally pleasing to the eye. We recognize people in our lives as beautiful when being around them makes us feel good. We see them beneath their surface. The same can hold true for us.<\/span><\/p>\n One of the people with whom I work in therapy<\/a>, when asked when<\/em> she felt beautiful, replied \u00e2\u20ac\u0153never,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d her eyes welling with tears. As we continued our exploration of this subject, I asked her how she defined the word \u00e2\u20ac\u0153beautiful.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d She referenced someone from her past whom she described as kind, warm, smiling, welcoming, and friendly. That became a reference point for us, and she was then able to discern she had, in fact, felt beautiful at times.<\/p>\n Often, what we truly perceive as beautiful is not what is traditionally externally pleasing to the eye. We recognize people in our lives as beautiful when being around them makes us feel good. We see them beneath their surface. The same can hold true for us.<\/p>\n Here are some examples of things you can do to improve your relationship with yourself and feel more \u00e2\u20ac\u0153beautiful\u00e2\u20ac\u009d\u00e2\u20ac\u201daccording to your<\/em> definition:<\/p>\n Think about what the word \u00e2\u20ac\u0153beautiful\u00e2\u20ac\u009d means specifically to you, and the moments in which you feel that way most deeply. How do you project your beauty into the world?<\/p>\n \u00e2\u20ac\u0153What I want to be, girls, is beautiful. Beautiful means \u00e2\u20ac\u02dcfull of beauty.\u00e2\u20ac\u2122 Beautiful is not about how you look on the outside. Beautiful is about what you\u00e2\u20ac\u2122re made of. Beautiful people spend time discovering what their idea of beauty on this earth is. They know themselves well enough to know what they love, and they love themselves enough to fill up with a little of their particular kind of beauty each day.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/em>\u00c2\u00a0\u00e2\u20ac\u201dGlennon Doyle Melton,\u00c2\u00a0Love Warrior: A Memoir<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Do you struggle with self-image? Do find yourself conforming to someone else\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s definition of beauty? Here are some ways to feel more beautiful\u00e2\u20ac\u201don your terms.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2944,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_crdt_document":"","_uf_show_specific_survey":0,"_uf_disable_surveys":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[542],"tags":[31,237,25,235,383],"class_list":["post-33908","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-featured-articles","tag-psychotherapy-practice","tag-body-image","tag-psychotherapy-issues","tag-self-esteem-psychotherapy-issues","tag-self-love"],"acf":{"author_show":false,"author_name":"","author_role":"","author_avatar":null,"author_profile_url":""},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.goodtherapy.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/33908","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.goodtherapy.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.goodtherapy.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.goodtherapy.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2944"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.goodtherapy.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=33908"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.goodtherapy.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/33908\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.goodtherapy.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=33908"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.goodtherapy.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=33908"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.goodtherapy.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=33908"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}\n