{"id":33045,"date":"2016-10-07T08:00:11","date_gmt":"2016-10-07T15:00:11","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.goodtherapy.org\/blog\/?p=33045"},"modified":"2016-10-06T13:16:18","modified_gmt":"2016-10-06T20:16:18","slug":"am-i-crazy-for-talking-to-myself-all-the-time","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.goodtherapy.org\/blog\/dear-gt\/am-i-crazy-for-talking-to-myself-all-the-time","title":{"rendered":"Am I Crazy for Talking to Myself All the Time?"},"content":{"rendered":"

Dear GoodTherapy.org,<\/span><\/p>\n

Apparently, I am the only person in my life who has remained unaware that I have a huge problem with talking to myself and narrating my own actions. A friend told me the other day that I talk to myself incessantly. I asked around, and everyone in my life who spends any significant amount of time around me confirmed it. I’m shocked, since I actually can’t stand it when other people do this around me.<\/p>\n

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I mean, I’m not totally oblivious\u2014every once in a while I’ll catch myself talking while I’m alone doing some banal task. Putting the dishes away, “Oh, that doesn’t go there.” Or grocery shopping, “Why, oh why, are there 437 different types of ketchup?” Stuff like that. But I seem to do it around people, too. I can’t get out a credit card to pay for something without, “Where is that card? Oh, I left that one on the table. Better use this …” blah, blah, blah.<\/p>\n

It’s incessant, now that I’m aware of it. I don’t want to fill space like that, or make other people uncomfortable, or waste breath saying these things that have absolutely no value. Not to mention people often are fearful<\/a> or wary of someone who mutters to themselves all the time.<\/p>\n

Why did I start doing this? Does this say something about me or how my brain<\/a> works? \u2014External Monologue<\/strong><\/p>\n

Submit Your Own Question to a Therapist<\/a><\/p>\n

Dear Monologue,<\/span><\/p>\n

Thank you for your question. Although what you describe\u2014unknowingly narrating your world to yourself out loud\u2014is neither uncommon nor an apparent mental health concern, I wonder when it started, what else might have been going on at the time, and why the behavior troubles you so much (that it may trouble anyone else is a separate issue).<\/p>\n

Sometimes when we\u2019re under a lot of stress<\/a>, this sort of thing happens. Maybe you\u2019re trying to figure something out, as people do when they\u2019re faced with a difficult problem. Maybe you\u2019re concentrating so hard that the words escape, a sort of unconscious<\/a> blowing off of steam. Or maybe you\u2019re just looking for an intelligent conversation!<\/p>\n

Then again, saying something out loud can be a way to help yourself process your experience or remember something, like reciting a shopping list or a speech you\u2019re going to have to make. Maybe you just like externalizing your thoughts into background music. Maybe this is your way of enduring the boredom of banal tasks. Maybe all of the above.<\/p>\n

I want to be clear about one thing: Talking to yourself does not mean you are going \u201ccrazy,\u201d if that\u2019s what you\u2019re afraid of. It just means you\u2019re talking to yourself. A LOT of people do it. A lot of people even find comfort in it.<\/span><\/p>\n

Also, why are there 437 different kinds of ketchup? I\u2019d like to know too.<\/p>\n

It\u2019s possible your inner voice is trying to make itself heard, to help you get to know yourself deeply, but so far it hasn\u2019t figured out how to make contact; it mostly just makes noise instead. Perhaps you could find a creative<\/a> activity of some kind that allows you to just let your voice rip. Or just let it rip any old time, so long as you feel safe and you\u2019re considerate of others around you. (It\u2019s true that some people are disturbed when they hear a conversation with only one participant, which doesn\u2019t mean the behavior itself should be interpreted as disturbing. Who hasn\u2019t muttered to themselves?)<\/p>\n

I want to be clear about one thing: Talking to yourself does not mean you are going \u201ccrazy,\u201d if that\u2019s what you\u2019re afraid of. It just means you\u2019re talking to yourself. A LOT of people do it. A lot of people even find comfort in it. The relationship you have with yourself is the most important one you\u2019ll ever have, after all\u2014and how you talk to yourself can nurture or even potentially hurt that relationship, so I encourage you to try not to criticize yourself<\/a> about this.<\/p>\n

A bit more advice: Listen to yourself. Pay attention to what you\u2019re saying, and even more importantly what you\u2019re feeling, when you\u2019re talking. And find someone sympathetic and knowledgeable to talk to\u2014someone besides you, of course, such as a trained therapist<\/a>\u2014about the unsettling feelings that surround your experience. Understanding those feelings and where they\u2019re coming from may inspire more compassion for yourself<\/a> and the behavior you describe.<\/p>\n

Take care,<\/p>\n

Lynn<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Lynn Somerstein, PhD, E-RYT, responds to our latest reader-submitted Dear GoodTherapy.org question.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":526,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_uf_show_specific_survey":0,"_uf_disable_surveys":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[625,542],"tags":[522],"class_list":["post-33045","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-dear-goodtherapy","category-featured-articles","tag-dear-gt"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.goodtherapy.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/33045","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.goodtherapy.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.goodtherapy.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.goodtherapy.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/526"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.goodtherapy.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=33045"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.goodtherapy.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/33045\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.goodtherapy.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=33045"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.goodtherapy.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=33045"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.goodtherapy.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=33045"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}