{"id":32160,"date":"2016-06-16T08:00:44","date_gmt":"2016-06-16T15:00:44","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.goodtherapy.org\/blog\/?p=32160"},"modified":"2016-06-15T15:12:01","modified_gmt":"2016-06-15T22:12:01","slug":"what-to-do-when-you-dont-like-your-partners-parents","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.goodtherapy.org\/blog\/what-to-do-when-you-dont-like-your-partners-parents-0616165","title":{"rendered":"What to Do When You Don’t Like Your Partner’s Parents"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"AMuch of life is shaped by the choices we make. We choose\u00a0where we want to\u00a0work and where we will live. We choose friends and partners. Most of us also choose\u00a0who we marry (if we choose to marry). When we commit to someone, typically we are agreeing not only to commit to them, but to what\u2014and who\u2014they bring with them. In many cases, family members are part of what a partner brings to a committed, long-term relationship<\/a>.\u00a0And although we can choose our partner, we cannot choose their family.<\/p>\n

Building a relationship with a long-term partner’s family can be difficult for all involved. Everyone involved is\u00a0adjusting to a major life transition<\/a>: parents are trying to adjust to a new relationship dynamic with their child and build a relationship with their child’s partner. The couple is establishing and strengthening their own\u00a0relationship\u00a0and making\u00a0their own life choices. If these choices conflict with what the parents envisioned for their child, the parents may perceive this as rejection<\/a>, which can put strain on the relationship. Parents who miss their child and want to have more of a relationship may seem pushy or over-involved. Any number of other reasons may serve to complicate\u00a0this particular\u00a0relationship.<\/p>\n

In my experience as a therapist, strained relationships with a partner’s family members, especially the relationship between a\u00a0mother-in-law\u00a0and\u00a0daughter-in-law, are quite common. If you find building a relationship with your partner’s parents to be challenging, or if\u00a0you just don\u2019t like your partner\u2019s parents, the following tips and considerations may be helpful:<\/p>\n

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