{"id":30106,"date":"2015-12-11T06:00:40","date_gmt":"2015-12-11T14:00:40","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.goodtherapy.org\/blog\/?p=30106"},"modified":"2019-12-16T10:09:45","modified_gmt":"2019-12-16T18:09:45","slug":"when-memories-hurt-living-with-loss-during-the-holidays","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.goodtherapy.org\/blog\/living-with-loss-during-holidays-1211154","title":{"rendered":"When Memories Hurt: Living with Loss During the Holidays"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"Cup<\/a>As the holidays and end of the year approach, many experience the recurrence of grief<\/a> as they remember\u00a0happy times with a deceased loved one. Loss and grief are among the most powerful emotions<\/a> we can experience. When grief recurs, particularly in relation to the pain of holidays, it can be confusing and overwhelming<\/a>.<\/p>\n

During the holiday season, symptoms of grief that have previously relented might suddenly return, and it can seem as though one is actively grieving again. This experience is known as an “anniversary reaction” or “anniversary grief.”<\/p>\n

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Find a Therapist for Grief<\/a><\/h2>\n\t
\n\n\t\t\t\t\n\n\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\n\t\tAdvanced Search<\/a>\n\t<\/form>\n<\/div>The first year following a loss is considered the most challenging as a griever faces many new experiences for the first time without the loved one. Psychologist Dr. Therese Rando (1993) describes six processes necessary for healthy grieving. Among these processes is the need for readjustment into the world without the lost loved one. This is, perhaps, the biggest challenge faced during the first year after a death.<\/p>\n

It’s common for waves of grief to overwhelm and disrupt the process of adjustment, as described by Rando. Although anniversary reactions can occur for many years following a loved one\u2019s death, they are usually felt most keenly during this first year as milestones are confronted. Holiday milestones can be particularly difficult as anticipation builds.<\/p>\n

The deeper truth of loss is that we are never truly finished with grieving when someone significant to us dies. However, there are many ways to live with the loss without suffering from it.<\/span>Symptoms can include anxiety<\/a>, anger<\/a>, and difficulty sleeping<\/a>, including waking up early or falling asleep. Sadness<\/a>, crying, fatigue, difficulty concentrating and focusing, and loss of interest in social activities can also be common. Additionally, symptoms may be more than emotional changes. Often, intrusive memories<\/a> of the loss and memories of past celebrations return.<\/p>\n

The deeper truth of loss is that we are never truly finished with grieving when someone significant to us dies. However, there are many ways to live with the loss without suffering from it. It is important to know the return of grief is a normal part of the healing process.<\/p>\n

Here are some suggestions to manage the reactions to anniversary grief during the holidays:<\/p>\n