{"id":17492,"date":"2013-04-03T11:00:04","date_gmt":"2013-04-03T18:00:04","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.goodtherapy.org\/blog\/?p=17492"},"modified":"2015-07-06T08:23:38","modified_gmt":"2015-07-06T15:23:38","slug":"recognizing-self-erosion-is-key-to-reversing-it","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.goodtherapy.org\/blog\/self-erosion-finding-yourself-0403135","title":{"rendered":"Recognizing Self-Erosion Is Key to Reversing It"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"Woman\u201cThe greatest hazard of all, losing one\u2019s self, can occur very quietly in the world, as if it were nothing at all. No other loss can occur so quietly; any other loss\u2014an arm, a leg, five dollars, a wife, etc.\u2014is sure to be noticed.\u201d<\/em> \u2015S\u00f8ren Kierkegaard<\/p>\n

So often, people come to therapy seeking to \u201cfind themselves,\u201d typically after a tragedy has occurred or some major shift has taken place in life and they realize they have somehow \u201clost\u201d themselves along the way. But there is another way of losing oneself that is more insidious, more subtle, and can be even more damaging. This is what I call self-erosion.<\/p>\n

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Self-erosion occurs over a period of time and happens so quietly that the person doesn\u2019t even realize it\u2019s happening. Self-erosion happens when we are so busy doing other things\u2014such as working, going to school, raising kids<\/a>, and being in incompatible relationships<\/a>\u2014that we slowly lose touch with who we are. Our lives become so much about what we do, how we contribute, and what we offer the world that we lose touch with who we are. The tragedy of the self-erosion experience is that when we finally come face to face with the reality that we have no idea who we are anymore, we have no idea where to start.<\/p>\n

You might be experiencing self-erosion if you have noticed any of the following:<\/p>\n