David Feder, MSW, RSW, CSAT
I'm a registered professional.
Registered Social Worker - 323330
to ask this therapist for billing and insurance information.
As I said above, discovery of infidelity is traumatic for most people who experience it. My philosophy is that like any other life event, before making a decision how to respond to it, people should be encouraged to understand it. Life events are challenges that lead to change and to improvement. Infidelity is no different. It is one such life event that either encourages individuals to face personal challenges, it can challenge a relationship that is stale and unsatisfying, or it forces two people to face a reality that their relationship should not continue at all.
My philosophy also includes "forgiveness". Regardless of the outcome people need to "forgive" either their partner, them self and/or the situation (sometimes including the affair partner). Without "forgiveness" we limp through life. By "forgiving" we sprint through the rest of our life because we let go of the burden we carry.
By resolving issues related to the affair and through the practice of forgiveness, we truly recover from infidelity and give ourselves the best chance to live a meaningful and full life after the affair.
or Call David Feder, MSW, RSW, CSAT at 1-800-651-8085 ext. 14042
What I Usually Need to Know to Help
In my work I would say that generally what I need to determine about a person in order for them to be helped in therapy are the following:
1) the ability of that person to be introspective;
2) the ability of that person to listen to another person with compassion;
3) how rigid the person is with regards to life events and events that happen that are unexpected and unplanned;
4) the attitude the person has regarding "forgiveness"
5) the history of "unfaithfullness" in the relationship
6) the history of the relationship (was it satisfying or otherwise)
7) the success of resolving problems
8) how the parties feel about one another
- Individual Therapy & Counseling
- Marriage, Couples, or Relationship Counseling
- Group Therapy
- Online Counseling / Phone Therapy
I specialize working with people who have been impacted by infidelity. To recover from this trauma people need guidance and support. Everybody survices infidelity, the question is how?
These people are in recovery and the goals of counselling are to help clients make a sound decision whether to remain in the committed relationship or to proceed toward separation. Recovery is not for everyone but neither is separation the inevitable outcome.
Whatever choice is made another goal is to reduce the animosity that exists between the parties. Infidelity brings out the worst in people (upon discovery) and people need time to process their grief. It is critical to avoid "high conflict separations" as these are hardest on children. My work with people is determined to reduce the number of high conflict separations when staying together is not the option chosen, or when it is just not in the best interests of the parties, or possible.
Client Concerns Within Your Scope of Practice
- Addictions and Compulsions
- Codependency / Dependency
- Emotional Overwhelm
- Family of Origin Issues
- Family Problems
- Grief, Loss, and Bereavement
- Infidelity / Affair Recovery
- Midlife Crisis / Midlife Transition
- Relationships and Marriage
- Trust Issues
- Anger Management
- Cognitive Behavioral Therapy /REBT
- Critical Incident Stress Management
- Family Systems Therapy
- Mindfulness Based Interventions
- Schema Therapy
- Solution Focused Therapy
- Systems Theory /Therapy
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