Michael Fraser, Therapist in New York, 10128

Michael Fraser, Ph.D.

Profession(s):
Psychology
License Status:
I'm a licensed professional.
Primary License:
Clinical Psychology - 015307

My Approach to Helping

I view anxieties, phobias, depressive symptoms and addictions as by-products of how effectively we are able to communicate with other people and the extent to which we are living our life the way we truly believe it should be lived. These two areas--how well we get along with others and how well we get along with ourselves--directly affect our well-being.

Is there someone or some place in your life where you are not able to express yourself, where you are not saying what you want to say, or where you are not doing what you want to do? Almost everyone has this person or place, and it can be frustrating when we can't get our message across for one reason or another. For teenagers, it can be their parents, their teachers or peers. In couples, one person may feel they cannot talk about something important with their significant other. For others, it can be around a family member, a work colleague/boss, or simply a general sense that they cannot express themselves effectively around small or large groups. And many people reach a place in their life where they ask, "Am I doing what I really want to do?" or "Am I with the right person?"

When this happens, frustration, anger, anxiety, sadness and other strong feelings can emerge. In addition to helping my patients better understand these emotions (and the accompanying negative thoughts that often accompany such feelings), I work actively to identify areas in which my patients can more effectively take meaningful action in their lives. Sometimes it involves communicating a bottled-up message to someone important. On other occasions it involves finally taking steps to making an important life change (e.g., in a job or in a relationship). I have found that when my patients have been able to identify what these major areas are and when they have been able to take meaningful action towards change, they begin to feel better and many of their symptoms improve. This is an important part of behavioral work that I engage in with my patients.

Too often, when people know they need to say something or take an important step towards change--but they do not speak up or take action--they end up feeling depressed, anxious, angry, and frustrated. They also tend to experience more about headaches, back or neck pains, stomach pains, panic anxiety, and relationship troubles. When people avoid confrontation, put off important decisions, or simply choose to take the 'easy' way out, they may not realize that their problems persist and, in many cases, can worsen. Things can reach a boiling point, often resulting in explosions of anger. These 'explosions' can take many forms, from outward rage to self-destructive behaviors to escaping into drug/alcohol/gambling/internet-related addictions.

In therapy, I work with my patients to explore ways to communicate more effectively and to act more assertively. They work towards saying what's on their minds in a way that others will hear them. They work towards making healthier decisions and taking meaningful actions towards their goals. As people move towards change and get closer to their goals, they tend to feel better, more confident, less anxious, less depressed, and relationships become healthier.

It can be hard to take actions towards change. Sometimes the situation or the timing isn't right. In therapy, I can help you explore the potential barriers to change. I can help you work through and find creative solutions that offer you the chance to feel better and to live a more satisfying life.

More Info About My Practice

If you have questions, I invite you to call me to discuss whether this is the right time to begin therapy. I like doctors who take time to listen to me. What is it you need to say? What is it you want to do? If you are ready to make some changes in your life, I am prepared to help you. For more information about me and my practice, I invite you to visit my website (click on the link above).

My Role as a Therapist

As a therapist, I believe it is my role to give my patients my full support in helping them to identify why they are seeking therapy, what they want to change, and how they would like to use their time in therapy. It is my job to take all of my clinical experience (over 18 years) to listen attentively to them with an ear towards helping them understand the root causes of their problems, as well as working collaboratively with them to explore meaningful ways to overcome their problems. It is my job to respect their agenda, not impose my own. I believe in being honest, sensitive and respectful and I believe in providing meaningful, helpful feedback-—not just listening neutrally and telling you when “time is up.”

Important Factors for Choosing a Therapist

If a person is seeking therapy, they should try to find a therapist who is experienced in the issues for which they need help (e.g., depression, OCD, couples work). They should follow their intuition. Do they feel like the therapist understands them? Is the therapist respectful? Can the therapist communicate how they work, and do they effectively address their concerns? Do they feel like the therapist offers them hope? I think these are important factors to consider in choosing a therapist.