Heidi Yoder, Marriage Counselor in San Francisco, 94102

Heidi F. Yoder, M.F.T.

Profession(s):
Marriage & Family Therapy
License Status:
I'm a licensed professional.
Primary License:
Marriage and Family Therapist - 47168

My Approach to Helping

My approach to individual therapy is a collaborative one that sees you as the expert on your life. When you are ready to reach out for help, usually it's because you have reached a state of distress over a recurring pattern of behavior or a situation/relationship that isn't working for you. Physiologically, this means whenever you try to work with it, the body floods with stress hormones that make executive decision making and empathic reasoning impossible. Have you ever found yourself in a heated conversation, unable to focus or care what the other person is saying? If for no other reason than that, having another person to discuss the matter with becomes a necessity.
I listen..., build a trusting relationship that enables healing, help you practice returning to a place of calm, reflect what I am seeing, troubleshoot with you if you are having confusion with understanding your experience and feelings, bring fresh perspectives, cultivate an environment of choice, and continue to check in to make sure that what we are doing feels right.
Couples usually come to me explaining issues that are keeping them from living the richness of their relationship. I listen..., I bring out our Sherlock Holmes hat and pipes, and together we track down where the misunderstandings have taken place, where shared meaning and connection have broken down and resentments have festered. We practice Non Violent Communication to keep defensiveness low and hearing high. Together we focus on what is working and find solutions for perpetual issues. I help couples remember the amount of time and energy they were putting into their intimacy and romance when they first got together and assess where they are with that now.

More Info About My Practice

For many people it's hard to seek help from a therapist. But just as you would go to your doctor or dentist for medical or dental needs: it makes sense to turn to a therapist for help developing healthier patterns of behavior and more positive coping skills. Achieving balance mentally and emotionally is an important part of improving the health of the whole self. I offer a free consultation to honor the client/therapist connection which is so crucial to therapy being successful. I have offices in both the East Bay and San Francisco and convenient hours.

What I Love about Being a Psychotherapist

I am passionate about therapy as a tool for growth and change. I feel it can offer people a level of quality of existence they couldn't have accessed without it. So many of us look up at some point in life and feel lacking in resources and tools. However we got to that place, finding some way to develop emotional intelligence becomes crucial as we see the same patterns (some self-destructive, some self sabotaging, all painful) occurring over and over in our lives. I am lucky. I have gotten to watch therapy transform the lives of so many wonderful people that I no longer have any doubt that it will continue to do so as long as there are people who take the time and energy to train in emotional/cognitive skills and those who have the courage and willingness to call them.

On the Fence About Going to Therapy?

If what you have been doing was working, you wouldn't be considering something else. If you have been considering therapy for some time then there is something about it that resonates with you. Do some research...look up therapists in your area and read their sites. Make some appointments. The great thing about trying something is you can walk away at any time. Each time you meet with someone, talk about your ambivalence and hear what they have to say. Do they support you, understand your feelings, encourage you to sit with a few people and see how your "gut" feels? Or do they respond in a way that makes you feel like you have to commit to sessions with THEM right now. Urgency tends to be a false emotion. It might tell you a lot about who you are sitting with. After sitting with a few therapists, you will know the next step to take. And if you don't, honor that feeling and do some more research. Having agency in your life means you get to make your own decisions, why make future regrets?

Services I Provide

Individual Therapy & Counseling
Marriage, Couples, or Relationship Counseling
Family Therapy
Group Therapy
Coaching
Consultation
Online Counseling / Phone Therapy
Home-Based Therapy

Ages I Work With

Children
Teens
Adults

Languages I Speak

English

Groups I Work With

Low Self Esteem, Chronic Self Doubt/Self Criticism, Trauma, Sex Addiction, LGBTQQI, Co-Compulsivity/Addiction Issues, Communication Theory, Radical Monogamy, Non-Monagamy, Sex-Work, Spirituality, Intimacy Issues.