How to be Successful in Therapy
September 15th, 2008 |
By Ernest S. Schmidt, LCSW
Click here to contact Ernest and/or see his GoodTherapy.org Profile
When people come to therapy they are often unsure of what to expect and sometimes ask me about how to get the most out of our meetings. There are several important things that you can do to increase your chances for success in therapy. I define “successful therapy” as achieving one’s desired results in the most comfortable and efficient way possible. This article will briefly lay out my recommendations on how clients can be successful in therapy.
Honesty
This is one of the most important aspects to successful therapy. When clients are forthright about their current struggles and fully disclose what has been going on, it makes the therapy move that much faster. Although it may seem obvious to be truthful to your counselor, it is often harder than you think. Depending on your situation, feelings of shame and guilt may get in the way of your ability to be open and honest. If clients allow these feelings to prevent them from sharing freely, it limits their chances to move forward and to make substantial progress.
Courage
To tell a total stranger about how you are feeling, whether it be sadness, anxiety, nervousness, shame, guilt etc. can be difficult and somewhat painful. It takes internal strength and courage to be vulnerable in this way, as it puts trust in someone else’s hands. Although most clients reveal themselves slowly as they build trust with their counselor, it can still be anxiety provoking. Courage is also needed when it comes to speaking directly to your therapist about your progress. This can feel quite unnerving, but good therapists should always be open to feedback. Clients that avoid this type of discussion may end up feeling resentful or prematurely end their therapy. When clients are unhappy with a certain aspect of the therapy and they have the courage to share this, it can substantially accelerate the progress and improve their treatment. This courage can tremendously benefit the client in reaching their goals and in my experience clearly improves the results of their therapy.
Diligence
The American Heritage Dictionary defines diligence as an: Earnest and persistent application to an undertaking; a steady effort. I see this motivation and willingness to follow through as a very important aspect to successful therapy. Although I understand clients will have various levels of enthusiasm when they first enter therapy, clients who end up being the most successful have the greatest diligence. They are active in our face-to-face meetings, and they work to remember and utilize the skills that are discussed. Some take notes as we speak, where others are fully engaged by asking questions and intently discussing the concepts. To be successful in therapy, one needs to practice the skills that are discussed not only during the therapy meetings, but throughout the week. The most successful are also those who consistently complete their therapy “homework” assignments. Without this follow through, commitment, and diligence, the therapy is much less effective and slower in achieving the desired results.
Quality therapy can produce amazing results and significantly change your life for the better. This can be done in a relatively short amount of time when you find the right therapist and when you do what you can to contribute to the process. By understanding the importance of honesty, courage, and diligence and working to emulate these qualities, your chances for successful therapy will undoubtedly increase.
©Copyright 2008 by Ernest S. Schmidt, LCSW. All Rights Reserved. Permission to publish granted to GoodTherapy.org. The following article was solely written and edited by the author named above. The views and opinions expressed are not necessarily shared by GoodTherapy.org. Questions or concerns about the following article can be directed to the author or posted as a comment to this blog entry. Click here to contact Ernest and/or see his GoodTherapy.org Profile
How do you get someone to be diligent?
I guess they just have to be at a point in their lives where they are willing to do what it takes to be successful in therapy and to overcome whatever issues he or she may be facing. I am not sure that diligence is something that can be taught- I think that has to come from within. Hopefully the right therapist can inspire patients and clients to do what they need to do in order to make the treatment the most successful that it can be. There has to be work on both ends of the spectrum.
How does someone in a confused state of mind stay diligent and have the courage to speak up about the lows in his/her therapy? People may not remember all the facts about their trauma, right?
This article was not written specifically for Trauma, but for people in therapy in general. I do believe that diligence can be taught or at least encouraged by the therapist/counselor. By helping the client see the importance of diligence you can increase motivation and adherence to whatever you both agree on. Give someone hope and a reasonable explanation and you can significantly change their behavior. A good counselor can do this, but of course it takes teamwork with the client. Good discussion…
I saw a psychologist about 12 years ago now – at the time I was pretty diligent, in that I was motivated and tried hard but I wasn’t honest and I didn’t have the courage to share various things with him. I made progress but I got stuck – a year ago now I started to see a counsellor again and this time I was determined to be honest and I was braver – it was incredibly hard but it has been so beneficial!
not everyone is fortunate to have support in their lives but there are friends and family members who can help you stay on top of things and keep encouraging those in therapy to keep trudging through
Once you find the courage to go to therapy in my eyes you are already a success in therapy. You have done the hard part which is getting yourslef there. Now you will have someone to stand by your side the rest of the journey and help you find the strength and dedication that you need to reach its end.
I agree with Xavier. Once you get the courage to go then you are already on the path to sucess. It is just that initial push that some often need to get them moving in the right direction.
But there are some who go to therapy because they feel it is the new “in” thing to do. There is no way that they are ever going to be honest with themselves about why they are there other than so that they can tell someone else they now have a therapist. Therapy has become trendy in many communities which really diminishes the good that professionals in this field can do.
Why even expend the time and effort, not to mention money, to go to therapy if you are not planning to be honest in the process?
my brother has multiple personality disorder. He has been in therapy for 3 years now. He has no violent spells and is almost normal cos he was very diligent. This runs in my family as a cousin of mine suffers from it too. He has also been in therapy with the same therapist but is not progressing well as he never took his therapy sessions seriously. How do we help him as family??
So much of the work to do is his but do you think that the current therapist could perhaps recommend another program or therapist for him if he or she sees that not much progress is being made? This would seem like the professional thing to do, especially if one of you family members could sit with the therapist too and plead your case. The other alternative would be to do research on your own into programs and counselors who are also trained to help in these situations and get referred to one of them.
Never really knew one had to put so much effort into being a success in therapy. I just thought with the right therapist that success and healing would just happen naturally.