By Cindy Ricardo, LMHC, CIRT, Self-Care Topic Expert Contributor

Click here to contact Cindy and/or see her GoodTherapy.org Profile

Do you schedule time for yourself on the to do list?

Most people are familiar with making a to do list at the start of the day. Whether the list is in your head or written on a sheet a paper, it’s there and it can provoke anxiety and stress.

Here’s an example of a to do list. See if you can identify the missing element:

• Drop son off at school
• Make deposits
• Meet clients
• Complete documentation
• Follow up – insurance companies
• Return calls
• Schedule appointments for next week
• Update blogs
• Revise marketing plan…

Did you notice the missing element?

For me reading a list like this brings up anxiety. While some of the anxiety is related to the pressure of trying to get everything accomplished, it’s also that self care is not a part of this list! Were I to follow a list like this for weeks, months and years at a time I’d eventually reach burnout.

Self care is essential to your emotional, mental and spiritual well-being. Can you run a car with no gas or electricity (i.e. energy)? How long would it last without an oil change or a tune up? Now granted the car doesn’t have a mind or soul but it does need attention and care in order to function at maximum capacity. Why would we be any different?

Many times I witness people investing more time in their homes and cars then they do in themselves. The end result is depression, anxiety, physical, mental and spiritual exhaustion or illness. Not taking care of yourself will have detrimental effects on your emotional and physical well-being.

When you don’t attune to yourself and meet your own needs it’s like running on fumes. Eventually your stress level goes up and you end up walking around like a zombie. I don’t know about you, but for me that’s not a healthy way to live! If you really think about it taking good care of yourselves is as necessary to life as breathing.

Making yourself a priority on your to do list may sound strange; however, it’s essential. When you nurture, love and appreciate yourself, you feel more energized, peaceful and ready to face challenging situations. Also your children learn about life, relationships and self care from you. So, if you incorporate self-care into your daily routine they learn that this is just as important as attending to their needs.

So how can you put yourself on the top of the list?

The following are some small steps you can take towards developing a daily self care routine.

Adding Self Care to your daily life:

1. Take 15 minutes out of your day to dedicate all to yourself. Incorporate a relaxing or soothing activity; listen to relaxing music and do some breathing and stretching exercises.

2. Create a self care ritual you practice once a day such as attending a yoga class, exercising, taking a bubble bath or writing in your journal.

3. Reach out for support from your spouse, family, or friends. Have someone take care of your children so that you can take care of yourself.

4. Schedule a date with yourself where you do something you like. Go the bookstore, attend a support group or go out to dinner with a friend.

5. Engage in a personal growth activity such as attending therapy sessions geared towards exploring your inner thoughts and connecting with your needs.

6. Learn to say no when you are feeling overwhelmed or stressed out.

7. Become aware of when you are feeling overwhelmed and take a break to de-stress. Go for a slow walk in a quiet setting, as you stroll notice your surroundings, the sounds of the birds, the wind as it touches your skin, the colors of the plants and flowers. Feeling more connected to nature can be a soothing experience.

8. Find a spot in your house and make this your special place to practice self care. You can decorate it with things that are soothing and calming to you such as candles, incense, photos of relaxing scenes.

9. Pay attention to your body. Make sure you’re meeting your own needs for sleep, nutrition and exercise.
Performing one or two of the following tasks on a daily basis will help you to feel refreshed, energized and much more alive!

©Copyright 2009 by Cindy Ricardo, LMHC, CIRT. All Rights Reserved. Permission to publish granted to GoodTherapy.org. The following article was solely written and edited by the author named above. The views and opinions expressed are not necessarily shared by GoodTherapy.org. Questions or concerns about the following article can be directed to the author or posted as a comment to this blog entry. Click here to contact Cindy and/or see her GoodTherapy.org Profile