Playful Living Starts with You

March 20th, 2012
By Mary Alice Long, PhD, Play Therapy Topic Expert Contributor

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I must first be who I really am, then, do what I need to do, in order to have what I want.

Have you ever had the thought, I’ll be happy when… we move to a new home; when I get the position I’ve been interviewing for; when I finish my degree; when I get pregnant; when I marry….

It all starts with you right Now.

To create the life you want, take responsibility and bring a playful attitude into your relationship with Self, your relationship with the Other in your life, and your relationship with Nature. New or unexpected adventures can be a great start. Did you ever want to…

• Join an art class
• Re-create family dishes: the ones your mom or grandmother used to make?
• Pick up a musical instrument and play!
• Take dance lessons
• Travel: how about being a tourist where you live?
• [Your turn, what would you like to try?]

Slowing down and spending time in solitude offers each of us an opportunity to listen deeply and explore:

• Daily journaling at a time and place of your choice, experiment with the best place and time for you to write—add images, drawings, paint, have fun with your journal, add color, stories, poetry, doodling.
• Go on a retreat—there are a number of ways to retreat—you decide where and for how long. The important part here is that you make an intention to give this time to yourself, time to breathe and listen. (Art materials, journal, camera optional).
• Listen to your dreams (both night and waking) and write them down in your journal. We all dream. Even if you don’t remember your night dreams, we all daydream. Watch for signposts along the way such as bumper stickers that can be your ”motto” for the day. When Hawk shows Herself pay attention. She may be calling you. What is She saying that might influence your way of seeing? Do you need a different perspective? Are you ready to take flight?
• Go on a play date, a couple hours of play by yourself is key to discovery. Magic happens!

Playful mentors: Children and grandchildren

• Want to play and create? Follow the lead of your children. Ask don’t tell. They know how to play and are great mentors for adults in how to be playful in all aspects of living.
• Listen to your children’s night dreams, ask questions about their dreams, and find ways to help your children respond to their dreams through drawing, dream theater, and storytelling. Do they want to act out part of the dream? Can you help? What character in the dream are you to play?
• Create dream journals together with images, stories, drawings—help the younger children to get started and then they can continue as they grow.
•  In our high-tech, achievement-oriented culture, we need Free Play! [Imagination first!]

Our Relationships at Work:

• “The opposite of play is not work, its depression.” Play, Brown, S.
• Serious work invites serious play. IDEO, for example, “believes in the power of play. It is an essential part of their approach…” http://www.ideo.com/expertise/play/
• Explore Six Archetypes We Live By: The Hero Within, by Carol Pearson; are you aware of the archetypes of the Innocent, Orphan, Wanderer,  Martyr, Wanderer, Magician? Each of these archetypal ‘personalities’ influence how we relate day to day with others while we work.

• Explore Move to Greatness: Focusing the Four Essential Energies of a Whole and Balanced Leader; by Genny Whitelaw & Betsy Wetzig.
• Are you often in Driver mode at work? Are you a Collaborator? Visionary? Organizer?
• Play is the foundation of all meaningful work.

Nature’s playground is all around us:

• Play outdoors every day.
• Each place, animal, plant, rock, body of water, and mountain can speak to us when we listen and are eager to learn their language.
• Synchronicities and sign posts show up unannounced. If we are ready, we notice “meaningful coincidences,” serendipity, and messages that bring meaning and playfulness to what otherwise would be unremarkable moments in our lives.
• Consider carrying watercolors, a jug of water, and a small piece of watercolor paper; pencil and drawing paper, camera, and notepad for those moments when you want to record your visit.

Slow down, listen, and remember that self-trust is important as you create the life you want. Each of us can bring a playful attitude into all of our relationships. Be good to yourself, and that “goodness” will spill over into the lives of others you touch in your lifetime.

Resources:
Dizik, A. Playing kitchen detective: Home cooks try to recreate family recipes; what did grandma put in her kugel? Wall Street Journal. Published February 23, 2012. Available from: http://on.wsj.com/ysxIYD

Pearson, C. (1998). Six archetypes we live by: The hero within. New York: Harper Collins.

Whitelaw, G., & Wetzig, B. (2008). Move to greatness: Focusing the four essential energies of a whole and balanced leader. Boston, MA: Nicholas Brealy International.

Brown, S., Vaughan, C. (2010). Play: How it shapes the brain, opens the imagination, and invigorates the soul. New York: Avery.

Beam, Lisa Sonora. (2008). Creative Entrepreneur. Beverly, MA: Quarry Books. (my go-to visual journaling DIY book!)

Related articles:
Ways to Play: Self Love
The Value of Play
Play is the Key to Contentment

Connect with Mary Alice on Google+

©Copyright 2012 by Mary Alice Long, PhD, therapist in Langley, WA. All Rights Reserved.

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