Patterns of Attachment

November 9th, 2009
By Arthur Becker-Weidman, Ph.D., Attachment Topic Expert Contributor

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In a previous article I described what attachment is and how it develops. As I described, the attachment system is a proximity seeking system that evolved to ensure the survival of the human infant. It operates like your home heating and cooling system. If everything is fine (safe) you don’t see the system operating. When things get out of bounds, the heating or cooling system starts to operate. When a person feels some threat, the attachment system becomes activated and attachment behaviors are evoked. Attachment behaviors are proximity seeking behaviors that draw the person closer to a preferred caregiver. The proximity creates or renews or recreates a secure base; a sense of safety, security, and comfort from which the person, once settled, can begin exploring the world.

There are several patterns of attachment that can develop. These patterns develop in response to the sort of caring that the infant and child experiences. These patterns are Secure, Ambivalent (in an adult this one is termed Preoccupied), Avoidant (in an adult this one is termed Dismisisng), and Disorganized. These are categories that have been refined and identified by extensive empirical research across cultures. There is a large body of research supporting these categorizations. In the research literature there are several subtypes within each category and two other categories that we won’t be concerned with in this article (Earned Secure and Cannot Classify). These patterns can best be described as a broad manner or style used to manage relationships. The pattern is the approach the person uses to manage and maintain relationships; based on the person’s earliest experiences. In early infancy the child may have one pattern of attachment with one caregiver and a different pattern with another caregiver. Sometime between the ages of three and five this “crystallizes” into one general pattern that is seen in all relationships. It is the way the person maintains a connection with others; the way the person achieves the degree of intimacy in relationships that the person is most comfortable and familiar.

In this article I will describe the patterns as seen in a child. In a future article I will write about these patterns as seen in adults. These patterns are NOT mental health diagnoses. The first three are normal patterns of relating, although the second and third ones are considered insecure patterns and less “healthy” than the Secure pattern.

SECURE:

Typical behaviors we see in children with a secure pattern of attachment are that the child will explore the room and toys with interest while the parent is present. If the parent leaves the room, the child will show signs of missing the parent during the separation. Obvious preference for the parent over a stranger is evident. The child will greet the parent actively, usually initiating physical contact, upon reunion. After the reunion, the child will usually settle and resume play.

AVOIDANT:

This child often fails to cry on separation from the parent. This child often actively avoids and ignores the parent on reunion (for example, by moving away, turning away, or leaning out of arms if picked up). The child shows little or no proximity or contact-seeking, no distress, and no anger at separations. Responses to the parent often appear unemotional. These children often focus more on toys and the environmement than on their caregiver in new and strange situations.

RESISTANT OR AMBIVALENT:

These children may be generally wary or distressed even prior any separation, with little exploration of their environment. They seem preoccupied with the status and location of their parent. They may appear angry or passive. After a separation, these children often fail to settle or take comfort in their parent on reunion, and usually continue to focus on the parent and fuss. They often fail to return to exploration after reunion.

DISORGANIZED:

This is the subtype most likely to develop into the psychiatric diagnosis of Reactive Attachment Disorder. As I will describe in a future article, this pattern is most often associated with maltreatment and with a parent who is frightening to the child. The child displays disorganized and/or disoriented behaviors in the parent’s presence, suggesting a temporary collapse of behavioral integrity and organization. For example, the child may freeze with a trance-like expression, hands in air; may rise at parent’s entrance, then fall prone and huddle on the floor; or may cling while crying hard and leaning away with gaze averted.

 

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©Copyright 2009 by Arthur Becker-Weidman, Ph.D., therapist in Williamsville, NY. All Rights Reserved.

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