Comments on: What is Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD)?

By: ms anonymous

ms anonymous — Sun, 11 Apr 2010 03:29:44 +0000

i would like to find out if some of my unusual behaviour as a child and now mildly, as an adult is OCD i always put it down to the mental and emotional abuse i suffered as a child like a reaction to being in constant fear nerves on edge all the time …i would be compelled to walk a certain way around a tree or lampost so many times,compelled to stub my big toe through my shoe while walking to feel the somewhat enjable pain (i must have looked very strange ) i would make noise at the back of my throat repetitively and still do actualy completely unaware im doing it …draw patterns with my finger over and over and over which i also still do ,feel the urge to touch certain surfaces several times over and over ,count things over and over ,stuff like that …the thing is my sister and brother also displayed strange behaviour too like me and im positive knowing what we all went through it was a side effect of growing up in a toxic dysfunctional family but you talk about OCD like its a brain chemical abnomaly nothing related to ones environment im really curious now can anyone shed some light (im 40 and this is the first time ive been brave enough to talk about such things ive always felt like such a freak all my life hoping noone will ever find out what a freak i am , but reading this article made me feel a sense of relief im not the only one !!!)

By: Dr. Arthur Becker-Weidman

Dr. Arthur Becker-Weidman — Tue, 23 Sep 2008 11:52:50 +0000

Dear Lucinda,

Yes, isn’t this a terrific article. I do hope that you will continue to share your thoughts and ideas on this blog. Your comments are valuable.

regards

Art

By: Lucinda

Lucinda — Mon, 22 Sep 2008 12:42:12 +0000

As an outsider looking in I have never thought about the multiple ways that OCD can bring such pain to people. To all of us who are uneducated about the disease we always think of it as someone who has to wash their hands maybe more than normal or maybe check to see if they turned off the oven. I really had no idea how crippling this disease can be in many families. I am glad to have read this article and the subsequent comments by the many readers of this blog. I have to say that this has indeed enlightened me and helped me gain a better understanding of OCD and mental illness in general. I thank all of you who were brave enough to share your words and experiences here with others who are looking for ways to learn and grow.

By: VMB

VMB — Mon, 22 Sep 2008 01:41:21 +0000

Hi Amy I’m sorry for being short last time,
Your obviously bothered by your experience,
Its no doubt affecting other aspects of your life.
I too had problems with my Mom….You sound like your
a young women, 23 or so… When I started thinking about
“stuff” that bothered me, affected me in regards to my Mom,
-When I started thinking about it ‘differently’ I started feeling
differently, no it doesn’t happen over night, but in time…I started to understand that my Mom really didn’t know how to go about doing things any other way, first of all she didn’t have any example, she just didn’t have the mental tools, therefore she was unable’ limited … But she was is very creative she did things DIFFERENTLY …not all bad Either…She wasn’t intentionally
trying to hurt me, upset me… Of course as a kid I thought she was…She loved me… Like your Mom loves you… When you were a baby Amy and your Mom held you close , she wanted all the best for you because she knew you were special Amy… Your Mom didn’t plan on having OCD and driving
those she loved cuckoo…. Stuff along the way happened, and sometimes its tuff shaking it lose… Amy try talking with maybe a counselor someone outside the family about how you can think about your pain differently… write stuff, down share it, do an abstract painting of what you’d like your pain to turn into….. Mull stuff over… Talk it out.. in time it shrinks…Try thinking about your MOM and what happen in different ways… I was mad, upset about my counseling experience.. to much stuff happening all at once
I had a breakdown… a form of ocd…I spoke to a priest,went to confession…The priest thought I was losing my mind (I think, I already, kinda lost it) anyhow he shook me up VERBALLY told me what I needed to hear..I felt bad, A good bad… but it helped me… I’m not advising you do the same; hey’ that’s what worked for me… well it helped “ITS A PROCESS” …No magic, it takes time, in time it will take … Again Amy ,try thinking about what’s bothering you differently…don’t allow your pain to become
an excuse,, a scape-goat for not being all you deserve to be… I should know, I’ve allowed just that many a time in my life, to keep me from my life…I don’t think you want that Amy, NO> Yuky”… Thoughts = actions …so’ Good Thoughts to you Amy… vmb < the artist…

By: Dr. Arthur Becker-Weidman

Dr. Arthur Becker-Weidman — Sat, 20 Sep 2008 22:09:20 +0000

Kayla,

You are right. I’ve not really seen a lot written about ruminations…obsessive thinking, yes, but not the ruminations part.

Amy, nice to hear about your experiences. That is a valuable addition to this blog and site.

regards

Art

By: VMB

VMB — Fri, 19 Sep 2008 21:44:00 +0000

I hear you Amy…Your Moms painful struggle, is reflected in your tone still…
Family counseling helps… vmb

By: Kayla

Kayla — Thu, 18 Sep 2008 05:01:28 +0000

This is a fantastic article! I especially appreciate the portion regarding “Ruminations”. That is one aspect of OCD which I have not seen written about before. As someone with this disorder I can certainly vouch for its inclusion, over-thinking often exhausts me and those close to me.

By: Amy

Amy — Wed, 17 Sep 2008 17:37:13 +0000

It definitely did but then all of us had to almost relearn a new way to live too. There were things that we knew we would do that would enable her situation so we had to learn to let go of some things as well. It can be tough to be in those supporting roles too. But we have all lived through it and are here to tell the story so that is a good thing. There was a time when it felt as if the whole family was going literally quite crazy, OCD is often looked upon as a kooky kind of thing but unless you have lived with it or through it you do not realize just how destructive and devastating it can actually be. My mom could not leave the house without doing certain things a certain amount of times so it really made for some tough times. But we made it and I am so glad to see that there are people out there paying attention to this and trying to help others who are facing this. Thanks so much for the great articles.

By: VMB

VMB — Wed, 17 Sep 2008 11:17:48 +0000

I’m ok people, all is fleeting, I too prefer a happier state of being … I’m grateful… but when the depths of feeling bad return … Saving Grace is in knowing happy will return…A happier state of being within… Levels of… no pressure… an ok state of being is quite adequate for surviving ones daily requirements in our consciousness robot human state… Subconsciousness THE HOLDING CELL merges waking the robot consciousness state out of its numbing
patterns with puzzling pieces of ones truth…shattering perceptual structure on the assembly of how it is …and How it should be… FLOP” PLOP falling off conveyer belt… YIKES” I’M BROKEN, I don’t fit the mold….Subconscious-Showing…OPS” Depressed… WHAT DOES ME WITHIN ME “MEAN TO MEAN” THIS GOES HERE” NO THERE, UPSIDE TO THE LEFT OF RIGHT AT AN ANGLE”’ OK… A STATE OF BEING ME ….A Truth of being self, or Not…UP DOWN UP DOWN…Lifes carnival ride, in the OK-ZONE of ME…. vmb

By: Dr. Arthur Becker-Weidman

Dr. Arthur Becker-Weidman — Mon, 15 Sep 2008 20:22:06 +0000

Dear Amy,

It is so nice to hear a positive story. Once she got help, did that make things easier for you and the others in your family too?

By: Amy M

Amy M — Mon, 15 Sep 2008 16:02:32 +0000

My mother was diagnosed with OCD when I was young and her behavior would just literally freak all of us out. Fortunately she sought help and through meds and therapy has been able to control it an d have a normal life.

By: VMB

VMB — Sun, 14 Sep 2008 04:47:27 +0000

Hello again VMB here,,, Thank You, It certainly helped me, purging a small fracture of my inner pain ,,, Yes’ the comments about my state of being MY SITUATION as it now is…Are right on, MEANING > I do believe my old Counselor/Therapist was, is Disturbed; Maybe sense then he’s sought out some sound help himself…I’d like Now’ to think as much.. Although,he did say to me, during my counseling sessions, that I was ‘HELPING HIM’ YES’ I was taken back by his statement, didn’t ask at that time, just HOW I was helping him… We all learn things about ourselves our world when we help each other; I don’t really blame him not to much anymore, for being a flawed human as I am, as we all-R…However I do feel now, that our roles > Patient Therapist Roles were at times during my counseling sessions REVERSED..
I mention that now, knowing now that his statement was a warning sign,- (THAT HE my former counselor HE TOO WAS OVERWHELMED) I was unable at that time in my troubled state of mind to discern exactly what was going on…
I wanted someone to give me good guidance ‘TAKE THE REINS’ not mislead me… I put a lot of my personal STUFF out there, on my very first session with him… I assumed, at the time, that a caring Intelligent Counselor/Therapist would make a honest decision whether or not, they were able to deal with my many issues, and If unable to for what ever reason, they were smart enough to then refer me to someone who was…That seemed to make good common sense, I did put a lot out there and I was feeling ‘Well Mentally desperate, A FLOODING of NEGATIVE THOUGHTS was overtaking my coping skills, I was ‘MENTALLY DEPLETED’ Of course now, Now that time has past (hind-sight) I now know, I was looking to latch on to anything, ANYTHING’ GOOD or BAD – (UNFORTUNATELY FOR ME, IT WAS THE UNHEALTHY COUNSELING SITUATION THAT I LATCHED ON TOO)- Anything to avoid feeling all that I was Feeling; I was taking care of my dying Father (as I previously mention in my original statement), a good man, whom I loved, love still dearly, he died while I was in the throws of my screwy counseling sessions with my former Therapis/Counselort! I do blame myself, can’t help but too..
I was emotionally a ‘MESS’ didn’t see this at the time, but I couldn’t bare feeling all I was feeling, I needed a counselor at that time to keep me there where I was, and just help ME sort my MENTAL MESS OUT …Something close to that would have been far better for my well being; Instead- (I’LL NOW MENTION SOME OF THE TWISTED THINGS THAT HAPPENED ONLY BECAUSE I BELIEVE THIS MAY HELP SOME PEOPLE, COUNSELORS/THERAPIST, POSSIBLY)- WHICH I VMB THE PATIENT, DO FEEL PARTLY AT FAULT FOR , yes I’m aware a counselor/Therapist is in a position to redirect , ask the patient why their feeling upset bothered by their statements and talk out, uncomfortable remarks, statements, suggestions etc…VICE VERSA … I tried to do just that after already having several sessions with this new counselor…I asked Him, OBVIOUSLY feeling additionally confused -(by his method of treatment)- in my already vulnerable state of mind…I ASKED HIM, JUST WHERE MY SESSIONS WERE HEADED WITH HIM” and HOW WAS I BEING HELPED!
He the counselor/Therapist would reply > YOUR ATTACKING ME V … so I would ask same question many different ways…He made me feel so bad for asking…that I actual believed that I was attacking him by verbally asking what THE HELL was going on…Of course as I said – I WAS WILLING TO LATCH on to ‘ANYTHING’ ANYTHING other than my own painful reality, even if it were, and it was unhealthy…
No my question was a sane question, Nevertheless I became convinced I was attacking him…. I was wrong”… YES THE DOCTOR WHOM REPLIED, SAYING EARLY CHILDHOOD, A NEED TO PUNISH SELF < ATTACHMENT ISSUES NEGLECT… YES HE IS RIGHT…. My first session with that former counselor, I gave some background history so he’d better understand the how and why of my now adult situation …I mentioned being sexually abused by an adult man, a neighbor whom befriended me at 6…I had much guilt and shame associated with that” I wanted to kill myself when I was a child,,,and no child should have to wake daily wanting to do such a thing”’but I did… I kept that a secret until I was in my thirties…
My Grandmother suffered with mental illness all her life… Every Sunday we’d visit Grandma….IN THE MENTAL INSTITUTION in Westburro Ma…. at the time, I thought everyones Grandma was living there, yeah I did for awhile. For the most part, the visits were pleasant, my sister and I had fun, lots of food, picnics on the well kept beautiful Hospital grounds…Yes’ My sister and I noticed that Grandma and her friends up there had many creative ways of expressing themselves…
Anyhow my Grandma had attempted suicided three times, by jumping out windows… On the forth try from a forth floor window in her mothers apartment, in front of me, I was about 7… Grandma smashed all the windows in the palor and dove out, hitting a concrete driveway below.. She survived, living another thirty yrs…in and out of the hospitals…
My mother also attempted suicide in front of me when I was 8yrs…Shes still alive and doing very well now…still in Therapy…My sister, best friend.. Fragile, but very daring..She took some dope a week before her 17 birthday which was the following week July 4th,.. She took some dope went swimming in Walden Pond…She physically never left…she drowned……I wrote an Illustrated a children’s book that’s out now a happy whimsically Ryhming story about my sister and my uncle a sailoir whom died in the wae after being there for three long years… ITS A HAPPY FUN STORY, SO YOU SEE IT CAN’T POSSIBLY BE REAL …BECAUSE REAL HURTS TO DAM MUCH…
I’m ok…
Anyway it was his call at that point to decided whether or not to take me on… I just wanted ‘HELP’ someone to help me.. I was extermly depressed…I also needed advice about how to approach discuss certain family issues, and (religious-spiritual) matters, in a kind and caring way with my dying father, while he was still mentally alert. I did so with out any help from that counselor… in my own way…But’ much was lost because I was Lost” LOST in my Looney counseling sessions WITH THAT FORMER COUNSELOR… AFTER SEVERAL SESSIONS and After him accusing me of verbally attacking him…I kind-of, No’ I did, give-up in a way…I was (in hind sight) in a numb state of being…became absent in many ways… My Counseling sessions were, became something else…I wasn’t mentally well”’ but Nether was my counselor…Blind leading the BLIND..so” I just went with it… because my other option was suicide…
My counselor started asking repeatedly to go to my room… WHICH NEVER DID HAPPEN, WE HAD NO SEXUAL ENCOUNTERS NONE.. He was calling me names belittling me…and I allowed it…I KNOW THIS SOUNDS CRAZY BUT ITS TRUE He said I needed a Master… He said V you don’t want to be lonely do you… I want to care for you… and no I didn’t want to be lonely and yes i wanted to be cared for WERE MY INNER THOUGHTS, HOWEVER A SMALL INNER VOICE SAID SOMETHING IS A-MISS HERE… and it was.. I told him I had to learn to be happy on my own, before I was willing to commit again to anyone, This he knew, I told him I hadn’t been in a relationship, intimate or otherwise for nearly 10 yrs.. … anyhow a lot of sexual innuendos were tossed about as part of my treatment, WHICH HE INITIATED, FIRST . eventually on both are parts, along witht Bizarre behavior, both verbally as well as his mannerisms… His head would twist about , he had a zombie stare …looking through me kind of a stare…Some sessions He would sit and stare at me and I would do the same, nothing just staring… I was completely lost amd I believe he was sleeping Yes sleeping with his eyes open, and those EYE-STARING ZOMBIE sessions were proably the most sane of all my sessions with him……here’s an example of how some other sessions went ACTUAL TRUE LIFE EXAMPLE HERE > My counselor talking like a child again rolling his head about saying> I’m special, don’t you think I’m special V… he’d repeat that several times… during these time I felt like a deer caught in the Head-lights of his inner struggles.. I’d just sit there when he was performing, or should I say digressing back into his childhood, or being overtaken by evil demons…I didn’t know what to think… My response was > we all have special Qualities … Well that’s not what he wanted to hear,,! He wanted me to say He was special… So I did.. I said Yes your SPECIAL…
He asked if I liked him better than other counselors I had prior (IN A VERY CHILD LIKE WAY) and I said Yes I liked him better…… well my sessions were something else… I thought, so this is what unconventional therapy is all about…Really…Didn’t really know, never had any …nothing to compare my counseling sessions with…besides of course those picnics I mentioned with Grandma and her roomates on the grassy hills of the Mental Institution…
MIXED UP”’SCREWY” NOT WHAT I NEEDED…anyhow I too am to blame after a year of this sort of counseling… I told him I loved him..
I thought I did… at the time… I started leaving crazy messages -OUTLANDISH MESSAGES on his answering services….WHICH WERE OBVIOUS CRIES FOR HELP and that something between US, me and that Counselor were A-MISS”’ .. Even after I left those “SCREWY’ messages, ,you’d think, he would assess our situation and then refer me to someone else…NO” ..Anyhow He too, left strange messages such as POEMS ABOUT US BEING BURIED TOGETHER FOR A HUNDRED YEARS OR MORE…over & over… that same poem… a form of intimidation, I NOW SUSPECT… Something like that.. Well’ He too made strange phone calls to me.. He also, Pretended to be his Identical brother … I’m Confused still, as to whether or not an identical brother of his really exist or not..maybe, Still not sure… > Head-Game therapy was played on me…
I know a lot of this sounds “INSANE” COMICAL even…Yeah” it does NOW’… But believe me, I became, because of this counseling experience very suicidal, ABSENT…ANGRY ”’UPSET”’… He eventually realized, that I wasn’t giving into him, I can now of course, only guess.. No sex with him, so he threatened to MURDER ME after I showed him an unflattering cartoon skit I drew, basing that on his so called counseling Methods… Well, I stopped seeing him for weeks… thought to put myself in the hospital, Didn’t though… Weeks later I went unannounced to his counseling job, to confront him with my mad… I was yelling at him, I was mad about for how I felt and his so called methods of Treatment…. He then said, he was going to call the police to have me locked up”’ME LOCKED UP” I reached for his cell phone, on the desk beside me, and smashed it on the floor,,,then left… MY PAINFUL TRUTH… I NOW THINK YES’ IT WAS PAINFUL FOR US BOTH… but I really wasn’t caring,, I couldn’t care not back then, not at that time, how He, my former counselor felt …I was mad and to upset… LINGERING RESIDUE still … Regaedless of all that had happened….HE STILL WANTED ME, TO SEE HIM AGAIN FOR FURTHER FOLLOW UP COUNSELING… and Me still in pain, now compounded with the ADDITIONAL pain caused by his SCREWY TREATMENT METHODS thought I should go back, to get some resolve ,,, But’ I didn’t … all was left hanging.
The man plays a very Dangerous Counseling Head Game.. and I told him so.. Playing with ones EMOTIONAL STATE OF BEING WHILE ON THE EDGE… IS NOT GOOD FOR ALL CONCERN, BUT THEN I BELIEVE HE TOO WASN’T MENTALLY WELL…MAYBE WE WE’RE BOTH HAVING A NERVOUS BREAKDOWN TOGETHER… THAT MIGHT JUST BE IT.. HE’S A HUMAN BEING WHOM HAPPENS TO BE A COUNSELOR/THERAPIST…BREAKDOWN… us both…maybe? its been 2 years since I had my last session with him.. I was throw off track… The bad mad has now left with time but a painful residual of that time forever lost, lingers still.. I don’t understand all that went on between me and that Counselor/Therapist Psychologically speaking I just know we – ME-VMB and that THERAPIST- were both not in a mentally stable place and WE COLLIDED! I honestly feel still for my former counselor – what words fit those feelings exactly , not so sure, He called me A LIABILITY I SUPPOSE because I wouldn’t submit, to what I’ll NOW call his > Hidden Agenda Treatment… ok” But he too, was then a “LIABILITY” a LIABILITY to other patients as well as to ALL THOSE WHOM take their Counseling profession seriously, wanting to sincerely give good advice, and guidance and never intentionaly creating more heartache for hurting patients, as well as themselves… I feel for him, my former counselor, really I do”..in many ways I don’t understand my feelings, why I should feel anything for him, yet’ I do… feelings I had as a child, when I was sexual molested at 6yrs old by a man, repeatedly, I felt then that I had feelings for him as well…
I know of course those feelings as a child being molested were unnatural unhealthy feelings.. A way for me, back then, and now to help me cope even if not real… maybe… All a mix-up of feelings, shame guilt unworthy-ness followed by suicidal thoughts.. The man whom molested me as a child also threatened to murder me…The molester, threaten to cut me up into little pieces if I didn’t behave..I told this to my former counselor …….He used what I told him to hurt me He too THREATENED TO MURDER ME…and That really “HURT ME” SHORTLY THEREAFTER, I had my Nervious Breakdown and smashed his phone…
Of course Only now in HIND-SIGHT did I start to understand why I had a nervous breakdown with this former counselor. He called me an arch-fool, Yes maybe I appeared to be…but I was a depressed troubled arch-fool that needed help …
I know this too will sound odd..STRANGE (don’t understand it myself) but I believe I did have LOVE FOR HIM real or not… Even now, I feel something mixed emotions, can’t explain why, only know I do… My Take… He misleads emotionally wounded female patients, in an effort to fill his own inner void… But its deeper than that with this man, that counselor, after all,, layers of ones-self, if given time, tend to SHED behind closed doors during counseling sessions.. He revealed, EXPOSED his Hidden-self… After spending 18 months with him, ( again 2 yrs ago) I feel i have at least the right to say what truthfully happened… Anyhow He felt very comfortable with me-VMB, as I said there was “ROLE REVERSAL” as well as “TRANSFERENCE” of my feelings as well as his… Again’ all that was, is now, is so much clearer Yup > HIND-SIGHT… WELL’ he my former counselor and I are, but flawed human-beings WE sideswiped one another…. Well’ I do pray for him now as well… pray through my own mad and upset, that still emerges…Less mad now though, bothered hurt.. YEAH STILL.. OCD I believe I did develope a form of it perhaps As the Doctor stated in his response to my first letter, Anxiety’ Yes’ I agree, that’s just what I was feeling when I continously drew those cartoon pictures of my former counselor.. I was trying to rid myself of those awful feelings; A nagative ctcle of drawing him over and over… Maddening …very… I feel better now, knowing what I was doing… Hopefully he too, my former counselor has already gotten Help or Intends too…. WE ALL LOSE ARE WAY… .. I know this is a bit long, theres so much more,, But I think people get the jest of it… I do hope my real said here, also helps someone else.. anyhow THANK YOU FOR THIS FORUM …SINCERELY VMB…. PS WERE ALL FLAWED… WE ALL SCREW UP … ITS OK TO ADMIT IT, GET THERAPY/COUNSELING …I’M NOT NUTS I’M AN ARTIST… HEY THIS MAY NOT BE APPROPRIATE TIME BUT THEN AGAIN I DID SAY I’M AN ARTIST…THERE’S A GREAT CHILDREN’S BOOK PijEe’s pie N the sky written and illustrated by this artist >.. Verna m. Boucher google the name you’ll get that Book…Great children’s book with beautiful illustrations..also a lot of Boston landmarks in it… I’m real, my depression is real, my experience was REAL,, I’m tied of feeling ashamed tied of hurting … My former counselor is not a terrible person, a troubled Man, back then as I too was, But’ not a terrible Man…. Thank you…V M B.. Thanks Much for all your comments.. help each other…yup…

By: Dr. Arthur Becker-Weidman

Dr. Arthur Becker-Weidman — Sat, 13 Sep 2008 21:34:48 +0000

Jolyn,

Yes, makes a lot of sense.

The absence of anxiety would suggest another underlying cause for the obsession other than OCD and your hypothesis sounds like it is right on target. A disrupted pattern of attachment caused by early neglect or abuse could certainly lead to low self-esteem and to treating oneself as one was treated. I think that this points out one reason why it is so very important to do a thorough assessment to try to determine the underlying cause of a behavior or symptom. The same symptoms may have quite diverse causes and those disperate causes each require a different form of treatment.

regards

art

By: Jolyn Wells-Moran

Jolyn Wells-Moran — Sat, 13 Sep 2008 05:56:45 +0000

To VMB — Definitely find a therapist you’re comfortable with, or if you think you might hurt yourself, call your nearest crisis line. Your experience with the terrible counselor sounds awful. Try your best to understand that it wasn’t about you, but all about a very disturbed counselor. I hope you’ll stay away from that person and get the help you need.

Best wishes,
Jolyn

To Dr. Becker-Weidman — Thank you for writing. That’s an interesting idea, but may not really fit the OCD profile. The obsession is there in those cases, but maybe not the anxiety that leads to a limited number of compulsive behaviors meant to alleviate the anxiety. Instead, I think it might have more to do with an early attachment issue, perhaps neglect or a need to punish the self for some reason — at least for some people. Does this make sense?

Jolyn

By: Dr. Arthur Becker-Weidman

Dr. Arthur Becker-Weidman — Fri, 12 Sep 2008 21:42:38 +0000

Dear VMB,

I see that you are in pain and have a lot of concerns, disappointments, and upsets. At this point I do think the best thing for you to do is to find a therapist with whom you feel comfortable and who can help you. You might try looking here for someone near you. If your insurance is not helpful, consider going to a local mental health clinic or family service agency. If you are upset enough that “Should I just go away and die,” is more than just a statement of emphasis, then you should immediately call your local crisis services or 911 or go to your local emergency room. Finally, you might consider talking with a trusted friend who might be able to help you locate a good therapist.

I hope this offers some concrete assistance.

By: VMB

VMB — Thu, 11 Sep 2008 12:20:25 +0000

Hi, I have been to counseling on and off, all my life, most always leaving feeling better for it. Then when my father was dying and I was caring for him and two teenage sons; Feeling overwhelmed, I sought out counseling, as I always had done before when feeling troubled ”MENTALLY VULNERABLE” !
I went into my counseling session with this new counselor for the first time very ungaurded, as I’ve always done before. Well the short is, it became, was a psychological entrappment I was, so I thought” given the impression I was recieving unconventional Therapy- (I never had anything other than standard therapy that’s what I went in for)- It was a hellish counseling nightmare, PAINFUL FOR ALL THE WRONG REASONS… I left him feeling far worse, very disturbed by his methods…which still linger, now that I’ve allow some time to pass, I’m still bothered by that experience but can see clearly how I was mistreated my emotional state of mind exploited Your web site with its posted warning signs about bad therapy is a very good thing. No people shouldn’t be afraid of getting counseled by a Looney tune counselor just made aware and be some what gaurded, know the ‘WARNING SIGNS’ I know the majority of counselors are caring competent people; its those few in every profession one must be aware of, to watch out for! As I said I’m still bothered by my experience “UNRESOLVED PAINFUL EXPERIENCE” that had side affects. Looking at your web site I came across OCD’ it gave a name to what I developed because of my unresolved unsettling counseling experience.. I’m an artist an author illustrated of a children’s book …I couldn’t get back on track after my bad counseling experience I started drawing over and over this counselor I coundn’t stop I became obsessed … for nearly two years… drawing him in unflattering comical counseling satire… Yes’ feeling mad upset, I’d draw him in humorous counseling cartoons, laugh hysterically then again as always start feeling depressed and cry… then draw …laugh….depressed….draw-laugh…depressed-draw-laugh-depressed-draw-laugh-depressed… I showed this counselor one of the comical skits I did of him” some with him and I, satire of his screwy methods of treatment… So I showed him during a counseling session with him, ( I was hoping for some answers, as to what I was feeling what had gone so very wrong) This counselor then asked after looking at my comically cartoon skit …he looked up at me, very seriously, leaning towards me and asked how I wanted to “DIE’ because he was going to “MURDER ME”… No joke that’s what he actual said… That’s an actual example of his method of so called “TREATMENT” I was given by him… as I said that’s just a small but very true example of how he mentally tormented me…from which I do believe I developed OCD… and continous distrubing nightmares, that have affected, on many a day, my waking state of well being with suicidal thoughts! I live here Jamaica Plain Ma. I need some resolve with this counselor as to why he hated me so much; that he would miss use his position to mentally torment me, with trickery therapy, that had nothing to do with helping me….I was but an amusement to him… and He said just that to me…I’ve tried several things in an effort to get resolve, closure of sorts… I know I’m not the only one this counselor has effected due to his so call unconventional methods! My upset about this past counseling matter with this counselor keeps emerging within me leaving me once again with ugly negative feelings! Again’ My Experience with that counselor has had damaging effects on my Psyche… ANY SUGGESTIONS, PLEASE! OR SHOULD I JUST GO AWAY AND “DIE”? Thank you for this forum, allowing my troubled mind to speak… Sincerely > VMB

By: Dr. Arthur Becker-Weidman

Dr. Arthur Becker-Weidman — Wed, 10 Sep 2008 21:59:39 +0000

What an outstanding article. You describe OCD very well and the case material makes this so much more real and alive. You’ve presented very up to date and current information in a readily understood manner; very nice work.

Joann,
I wonder if you’ve considered the possibility that not letting go, or obsessing about a relationship, may be a symptom of OCD rather than a cause? What do you think of this idea?
regards
Art

By: Joann

Joann — Wed, 10 Sep 2008 10:19:15 +0000

OCD is a common by-product of people who cant let go of a past love life. A friend of mine has lived 5 years in the same neighbourhood as her ex. She has watched him get married, have children and he still has no clue that she moved there to watch him everyday in her miserable life. It chills me because that is stalking at some level. She is in therapy and is moving next month out of her home. We have our fingers crossed.