Category: Right Use of Power
The Good Therapy Blog
May 22nd, 2012 |
Note: The important issue that inspired this article was called to my attention several times . . . once by a trainee, then again by Noah Rubinstein during my web conference for GoodTherapy.org on the subject of transference, and again when, as a member of GoodTherapy.org I received their mailing about the petition I link to below. Many thanks to you, Noah, for your work helping to expose the dangers of the proposed DSM-5, and for offering me the opportunity to go even deeper into this issue.
Psychotherapy, when practiced as it's meant to be—with deep integrity, full commitment, seasoned skill,... Read More
May 9th, 2012 |
"My parents want me to defeat Einstein." "My parents want me to be more educated than they are." "My parents want me to make them proud." "My parents want me to have the best score on the National Exam." "My parents want me to be an important person." These are some of the responses to my curiosity about what my Indonesian 6th-grade students think their parents want for them. Because I teach English, lots of good discussion topics come up. When I next asked these students what they wanted for themselves, they were in strong agreement with what their parents wanted for them. "How do your parents... Read More
April 5th, 2012 |
Nurses are vital to our health-care system. There is already a shortage of nurses, and the nurses who are employed full-time are usually overburdened with excessive responsibilities and large patient loads. Recruiting and retaining novice nurses (NN) is critical to maintaining effective and available health-care services. But workplace bullying (WPB) is limiting the number of NNs, and because of WPB, nearly one-third of all NNs plan to leave their chosen fields. Senior nurses are supposed to supervise, mentor, and teach... Read More
© Copyright 2012 by http://www.GoodTherapy.org Therapist Schaumburg Bureau - All Rights Reserved.
April 4th, 2012 |
The recent shooting of 17-year-old Trayvon Martin has sparked a firestorm of controversy. While everyone who’s given any thought to the matter agrees that Trayvon should not have died, explanations of what happened vary greatly. However, when examining statistics on shootings, it becomes clear that people of color are at an increased risk of being shot. There are significantly more police shootings of unarmed black people than there are of unarmed white people. But inevitably, the shooters claim that they were just doing their jobs and that they thought their lives were in danger, not that they... Read More
© Copyright 2012 by http://www.GoodTherapy.org Therapist Birmingham Bureau - All Rights Reserved.
March 20th, 2012 |
This article is the second part in a series on right use of power for youth.
Scene: ESL (English as a second language) class in Central Borneo, Indonesia. There are four 12th grade students and six 6th grade students in this class. This process lasted for three 1-hour-long class periods.
Let's review: power is the ability to have an effect or to have influence. All people have personal power, whether they know it or not. Any position of authority adds another layer of power to personal power. Positions of authority include teacher, religious leader, doctor, head of a company, government official,... Read More
March 16th, 2012 |
I really appreciate the feedback about principles 1-4 from the GoodTherapy.org community. Your contributions enrich all our growth and learning. Here are principles 5-8.
Principle 5. Never call a bullfrog a giant without thinking about the reference group you use (better yet, just don’t compare or label).
If you don’t, this bullfrog might think you are judgmental and presuming (“haven’t you seen my little sister?”), you might hurt its feelings (“what do you mean?”), it may feel invalidated (“God knows about all the real giant frogs at school who kick me all day”), or hurt... Read More
February 22nd, 2012 |
"So, I'm curious. Do you know that word?" Heads nod. Looking toward the boys: "What do you like about being boys?" "Boys do adventurous things." "Great, you used one of this week’s new words!" "What else?" "Boys are the head of the household." The boys then puff up their bodies and start imaginary punching in the air coupled with laughter. "You mean the head of the household hits people?" The boys give me a caught-in-the-act-of- unconscious-play-suddenly-becoming-serious look. Silence. I look at the girls. "Do you get hit a lot?" The girls sit still and say nothing. I realize that these questions... Read More
February 21st, 2012 |
The contenders in the GOP election process are presenting themselves as devoutly religious people. But what lies within these candidates beneath their religious presentation? Often in life we don’t get to see what lies beneath a person’s “good self” presentation, also called a mask. We don’t get to find out if that person really is religious, kind, caring or not. The discrepancy is often hidden.
How does this occur? When we’re children, often, but not always, in response to trauma or abuse, we experience our own mean-spiritedness and our own destructiveness. It may even start out... Read More
February 7th, 2012 |
How is this a story of triumph and choice from an anonymous inmate in an anonymous prison in an anonymous year? First, the story (as written by the inmate):
"Martin Luther King said, 'The true mark of growth isn't how a man acts when or during times of comfort and happiness, rather how he acts during times of trials and controversy.' I put that to the test last week. On my way to chow the Asst. Chief of Security pulled me aside and searched me. My shoes had a hole in the heel from daily wear. He accused me of using it as a hiding spot for contraband. He told me to go to my room and don't leave... Read More
December 20th, 2011 |
Story: “Once at the end of a first session, my client asked for some “homework” so I suggested she do some journal writing about a habit she had discovered during the session. When she arrived for the next session, she sat down, looked at me, and immediately began almost screaming that she ‘couldn’t trust me…I was just like all the others…she knew this wasn’t going to work…I had a formula that I applied to all my clients…and I wasn’t going to take a personal interest in her…’. ‘My goodness, you certainly have strong feelings!’, I replied. ‘Yes, I do! I just can’t... Read More
November 17th, 2011 |
A while ago I had an interchange with someone that got me thinking. It went like this:
"I had been mistreated for so long that the good parts and the financial security of the job just finally were outweighed by my loss of self-esteem. So, I rehearsed for weeks how to tell my boss I was leaving in a peaceful, non-blaming way. Just that it was time for me to move on. I went into his office and made my rehearsed statement."
"What was his response?"
The woman said, "I couldn't believe it. What a joke! He actually said, 'Are you unhappy? Is there another place in the company... Read More
November 4th, 2011 |
If Hollywood is an indicator of our most common fantasies, modern Americans want to sleep with their therapists. I am horrified that so many television shows and movies depict romantic relationships between therapists and clients as though they were perfectly normal! The truth is, romance within a therapeutic relationship is as far from normal, acceptable, healthy, and sane as you can possibly get.
The writers of How I Met Your Mother currently have the character Robin dating her previous therapist. The relationship has been rationalized through a serious of cutesy excuses: “Well, we only... Read More
October 18th, 2011 |
Forgiveness is often misunderstood. I recall asking a colleague to forgive me for my unskillfulness in handling a situation that affected him. I had made an important decision without consulting him. I was truly sorry. His response to my request for forgiveness, however, surprised me: "If I forgive you, it will be as if it never happened. And it did happen so forgiveness wouldn't be right." Forgiveness, in fact, is a very deep feeling of reverence for life and willingness to somehow let go of past hurt. It does not require forgetting or condoning or even reconciling, as my colleague imagined... Read More
August 23rd, 2011 |
Let's say you have an interest in power issues and dynamics. For example, you notice you are overly cautious in using the professional power that goes with your position of trust. Or, you are so well-boundaried that you can't be flexible with your power when it is appropriate. These two beliefs are toward the extreme on the "use of power continuum." Holding any position that is extreme makes you extra vulnerable for making ethical mistakes. Right Use of Power calls us to examine... Read More