Category: Relating to Self and Others
The Good Therapy Blog
July 13th, 2011 |
If you read last month’s blog, Creativity vs Shadow, you will remember a brief mention of Deepak and Gotham Chopra’s book, The Seven Spiritual Laws of Superheroes. In the book Chopra identified shadow as a “force of the unconscious that can be destructive, divisive and/or self-sabotaging if it remains unconscious”. Shadow is difficult to recognize because left to it’s own devices it remains unconscious.... Read More
July 12th, 2011 |
Yesterday Ellen walked into my office looking annoyed and confused. “I don’t know what to do. Robin invited me to her wedding and I don’t want to go, but I think I should. It’s a destination wedding, a long weekend in Mexico- four days! It might be fun but I can’t afford it, and I can’t take time off from work either. But I have to go.”
“Why do you have to go?” I asked.
“Because of what happened. Her parents both died in an... Read More
July 12th, 2011 |
You might have heard the phrase “love is the glue” that holds us, the universe, etc. together. I'd like to make a case for mindfulness as a similar connecting agent. In thinking of the work I am passionate about offering at Counseling on Capitol Hill, I've discovered that the various offerings have a common theme. What is it that couples counseling, Positive Discipline parent education, individual therapy, mindfulness coaching, and family therapy have in common?
Each... Read More
July 11th, 2011 |
When a family member is struggling with addiction the entire family system suffers. Life inside the family system can become a rollercoaster of emotions. It is common for parents to blame each other or themselves when their child is suffering from addiction. All family members are affected with the chaos that addiction brings to the family unit. Emotions often range from denial, grief, fear, anger, shame, and a tremendous sense of loss.
People are quick to judge... Read More
July 8th, 2011 |
Many of you may remember the role of the Greek Chorus in literature classes from high school or college. They appeared in the works of Sophocles, Aeschylus, Euripidies and Aristophanes, to name just a few. Their role was to explain what they thought was going on and would intentionally or unintentionally “stir the pot”. In modern times, it is often our friends and families who comprise our own personal Greek Choruses as they work so lovingly to protect us from what we have not yet experienced and to help us along in life. Consider the following scenario:
Bob and Cynthia are getting divorced.... Read More
July 8th, 2011 |
I recently stumbled across a new blog called Infinite Daze where the author poignantly writes about her daily struggles with Fibromyalgia and Chronic Fatigue Syndrome (CFS). In a recent post titled Should I Stay or Should I Go Now, she has this to say about her marriage:
“I had a revelation today. During my son’s graduation ceremony at his high school, my husband came up to me and squatted down next to my wheelchair... Read More
July 7th, 2011 |
When we think of a bully we might be reminded of a big kid from school who used his or her size to intimidate others. Maybe we have an image from some television show or movie of a hulking being pushing others around. As a couples counselor I can tell you bullies come in all shapes and sizes. They can be demur women and they can be medium sized men. They can be kind in their presentation and underneath they can be steaming with anger and come out harsh. ... Read More
July 7th, 2011 |
"When trust and confidence--at both the personal and institutional levels--are high, democracy works better, the economy develops with fewer problems, interpersonal relations are easier and more straightforward, people behave more altruistically, and standards of living increase."
-Aitor Riveiro: The costs of a skeptical society, June 21, 2011: El Pais reporting on results of several pieces of sociological research.
This may not be a surprising conclusion, but I find the idea that... Read More
July 6th, 2011 |
New information reveals the importance of support for those caring for people with mental health challenges. Family-to-Family (FTF) is a 12 week support program that is available to people throughout the country, sponsored by the National Alliance on Mental Illness. The program is run by volunteers, and is free to anyone who cares for someone with mental health challenges. To determine its effectiveness at relieving caregiver... Read More
© Copyright 2011 by http://www.GoodTherapy.org Therapist Lake Oswego Bureau - All Rights Reserved.
July 6th, 2011 |
This month I had promised to deliver Part 2 of my article “Making Friends with Feelings”. And my theme is not going to diverge much from this topic, but there has been a bit of a change in my writing plan. Since my last blog post, my dad was diagnosed with and unsuccessfully treated for lung cancer— he died in early June. It was a very quick process, head-spinningly so. And as a result, the emotion at the forefront of my consciousness these days is grief.
I’ve... Read More
July 5th, 2011 |
Are you a person who takes care of everyone else before yourself? Do you believe you should put yourself last? If you take care of other's needs before your needs routinely, then you may have co-dependent tendencies. Taking care of yourself enables you to then be available to take care of others. If you neglect your personal needs and wishes and care for others instead, then you may begin to feel resentful and "empty." In a relationship, co-dependent behaviors can potentially... Read More
June 30th, 2011 |
If our children are experiencing anxiety, beginning to panic, to feel so sick they refuse school or activities we want to help them. Nevertheless, how can we help a child when they are so anxious all they can seem to think about is the stressor that is provoking their anxiety? As a parent, you do not want to make the situation worse. There are solutions to help children the following ideas can be used together or separately and with repeated practice, children can learn to decrease... Read More
June 29th, 2011 |
A psychology professor at California State Long Beach has compiled an impressive pile of data – over 500 studies! – that suggests that women are at least as if not more physically aggressive than men in their intimate relationships. In a 2008 ABC News “What Would You Do?” segment, actors played out two scenarios in public: a man verbally abusing his female partner, then shaking her and pulling her hair, followed by a woman doing the same to him. In the first instance,... Read More
June 29th, 2011 |
There’s a distinct set of habits that are shared by almost all people who know how to get their partners to be open-minded and receptive, and thanks to decades of painstaking relationship research, we now know exactly what these habits are. If you want to succeed in love, you simply must have specific interpersonal abilities. If you have them, chances are very good that over the long haul your partner will be responsive to your wants and needs. If you don’t have... Read More
