Click here to contact Gail and/or see her GoodTherapy.org Profile

National Eating Disorders Awareness Week occurs this month, and it is a necessary reminder of the role body image plays in women’s self-esteem. While women with clinical eating disorders, such as anorexia nervosa or bulimia, typically have a distorted body image, even those without eating disorders often struggle with body image concerns ranging from mild dissatisfaction to outright self-hatred. Any woman can feel tormented, terrorized, and completely obsessed with the image reflected back in the mirror.

What perpetuates this assault on body-esteem? Well, one of the biggest offenders is the media. Air-brushed, photo-shopped images of models and celebrities create unattainable expectations of perfection. Ninety-eight percent of American women are heavier than most models (Smolak, 1996), yet they frequently aspire to these impossible standards. Billions of dollars are spent each year on anti-aging skincare, plastic surgery, and diet products. According to the Social Issues Research Centre (1997), 80% of adult women are unhappy with their appearance. Many women internalize the media’s standards of an ideal body, and this can be a risk factor for poor body esteem, dieting, negative mood, and binge eating (Vandereycken, 2006). And this dissatisfaction starts early. Collins (1991) found that 42% of girls in first, second and third grade want to be thinner, and by age 17, approximately seven out of ten girls have been on a diet (SIRC, 1997). Wardle and Marsland (1990) found that almost 40% of 11-12 year-old girls viewed themselves as overweight. Family dynamics, peer pressure, and emotional problems, such as depression, low self-esteem or even a history of trauma, can all contribute to a poor body image. However, societal expectations are the most insidious.

Body image distortion and dissatisfaction are characteristic of eating disorders such as anorexia nervosa or bulimia nervosa. Eating disorder symptoms usually consist of restrictive eating, binge eating, and/or attempts to eliminate what was consumed. A poor body image can also compel women to mistreat their bodies in other ways. Some women exercise to the point of injury, unable to accept a body that is not perfectly toned. Others compulsively tan, despite the risk of skin damage. Still others seek out plastic surgery to correct any perceived flaw or forestall the effects of aging. The most extreme form of body self-hatred is body dysmorphic disorder (BDD), defined as a preoccupation with an imagined defect in appearance, or an excessive concern over a slight physical irregularity. Women with BDD may become obsessed with a particular body part, such as a nose or stomach, and will go to extremes to hide or camouflage it. They might avoid social situations, become depressed, and may even seek plastic surgery in hopes of repairing the problem.

While women with eating disorders or BDD often benefit from psychotherapy, others with less severe body image concerns still need to challenge the negative effects of society’s message, that to be attractive you must be young, white, wealthy and impossibly thin. What are some basic things you can do?

1) Challenge unrealistic assumptions and expectations. Appreciate your body for its capabilities and power, for what it can do and how it moves, not just for how it looks. You are a whole person, not the sum of body parts that need to be perfected. Be realistic about your size, build and genetics and learn to enjoy your own unique beauty.

2) Treat your body well. Feed it, exercise it, give it plenty of rest and pleasure. Learn to enjoy all of the good things it has to offer, and the things you take for granted, like walking down the street or drawing a breath. Remember, the body truly is the “temple of the soul.”

3) Refuse to accept the dictates of the media and fashion industry. Question the motives of ad campaigns that stress unattainable standards and vote with your wallet. Wear clothes that make you feel comfortable. Challenge attitudes that equate self-worth with physical attractiveness. Think of the values you would want your daughter, your niece, your friends to internalize. Then apply those values to yourself.

References:

Collins, M. (1991). Body figure perceptions and preferences among preadolescent children. International Journal of Eating Disorders, 10, 199-208.

Smolak, L. (1996) National Eating Disorders Association/Next Door Neighbors Puppet Guide Book.

Social Issues Research Centre (1997). Mirror, mirror: A summary of research findings on body image. Retrieved from http://www.sirc.org/publik/mirror.html.

Vandereycken, W. (2006). Media influences and body dissatisfaction in young women, Eating Disorders Review, 17, 5.

Wardle, J. & Marsland, L. (1990). Adolescent concerns about weight and eating: A social-developmental perspective. Journal of psychosomatic Research, 34, 377-391.

©Copyright 2010 by Gail Post, Ph.D. All Rights Reserved. Permission to publish granted to GoodTherapy.org. The following article was solely written and edited by the author named above. The views and opinions expressed are not necessarily shared by GoodTherapy.org. Questions or concerns about the following article can be directed to the author or posted as a comment to this blog entry. Click here to contact Gail and/or see her GoodTherapy.org Profile

Click here to contact Darlene and/or see her GoodTherapy.org Profile

In working with women for decades, I’ve found that self-esteem is the common denominator of many women’s issues. With better self-esteem, women are more able to find balance, handle stress, and claim their autonomy.

Universally, women are considered inferior to men, and although our culture is changing, most women suffer from impaired self-esteem, even successful women. Self-esteem impacts our relationships with others and our relationship with ourselves. It affects self-care, parenting, boundaries, and communication. Self-esteem determines the way we allow others, including our children, to talk to us, and how we value and communicate our needs, thoughts, and feelings. It underpins personal integrity, our ability to pursue goals, and is crucial to effective parenting. A mother may praise her child and try to impart self-esteem, but if hers is low, inevitably, it will be revealed in her behavior, and children learn most by emulation.

Balance is an ongoing struggle for women. As individuals, as caregivers, and as earners and professionals, finding balance between our masculine and feminine sides, between the spiritual and material, between work and family, and between personal needs and those of our employers, children, parents, and partners requires self-esteem and autonomy, not to mention time, which there is always too little of. Rather than acknowledging how much they achieve, women typically are self-critical that they are not accomplishing enough at work, as mothers, homemakers, daughters, or in their personal endeavors. They feel guilty when they don’t meet their own and other’s expectations. The fact is there isn’t enough time and energy to go around, but how we think about it and allocate our resources makes all the difference.

Women are used to stress – caring for children while cooking, cleaning, and talking on the phone. Working moms have added stress and it’s a greater challenge for them to make time for themselves. According to the latest census, 55 percent of mothers (63 percent of college-educated moms) with infants work. Of mothers under the age of 45 without infants, 72 percent are in the workforce. When I returned home to my children after a stressful day practicing law, I’d park my car outside my house to meditate for ten minutes before going inside. This allowed me time to get centered and transition to parenting. Self-esteem enables women to practice self-care and to balance these competing demands, reducing stress and allowing them to be present to loved ones and any task at hand.

Setting boundaries is vital to reducing stress and finding balance. Women are plagued with the dilemma of feeling guilty when they say “no” or resentful when they don’t. They fear loss of the relationship or the person’s esteem. Relationship loss is the biggest stressor for women, as is failure for men. The ability to feel comfortable setting boundaries requires self-esteem. When women value themselves, they are more able to claim their autonomy. Autonomy is a feeling of both separateness and wholeness that permits us to feel separate when in a relationship and complete when on our own. Many women complain that they do great when they’re alone, but as soon as they’re in a relationship or in the presence of their partner, they lose themselves. Some give up their hobbies, friends, career, and creative pursuits. They have trouble transitioning from an intimate weekend to the office, or they can’t articulate opinions about things in front of their partner or an authority figure.

Attachment is paramount for women. One reason autonomy is difficult is that girls don’t have to separate from their mothers to become women. According to Carol Gilligan, femininity is defined by attachment, and feminine gender identity is threatened by separation. On the other hand, since boys must separate from their mothers and identify with their fathers to become men, their gender identity is threatened by intimacy. (In a Different Voice: Psychological Theory and Women’s Development, 1993, pp. 7-8).

Autonomy’s opposite, codependency, is common among women. Lack of autonomy and self-esteem can cause many symptoms, such as stress, addiction, domestic violence and emotional abuse, communication problems, worry and anxiety, depression, guilt, and anger. Untreated over time, women’s health suffers. I’ll be exploring these issues in detail and how they relate to many problems, such as abuse, self-empowerment, life cycle transitions, health, body image, and sexuality. I welcome hearing any questions and concerns that you’d like addressed in the months ahead.

©Copyright 2010 by Darlene Lancer, MFT. All Rights Reserved. Permission to publish granted to GoodTherapy.org. The following article was solely written and edited by the author named above. The views and opinions expressed are not necessarily shared by GoodTherapy.org. Questions or concerns about the following article can be directed to the author or posted as a comment to this blog entry. Click here to contact Darlene and/or see her GoodTherapy.org Profile

Serving in the armed forces in any capacity, including in armed combat, can take a significant toll on personal well-being, a connection that has long been studied and addressed by researchers and other professionals. Understanding which people may be more susceptible to the development of psychological issues as a result of their experiences is of great importance for not only treating these issues but for helping to prevent them, as well, and ongoing efforts to identify key risk factors hold the potential to improve the quality of life of both active duty personnel and veterans. The UK’s Ministry of Defense has recently released data showing that women serving in the three main branches of the military are more than twice as likely to exhibit psychological issues as their male counterparts, a finding that may impact the country’s proposal to allow women to serve in front-line combat positions.

The report highlights statistics showing that seven of every thousand women in the military will become affected by a psychological concern requiring therapy or other forms of treatment, the same is true for only three of every thousand men. Yet representatives of related social welfare and mental health groups note that the data may be skewed, given that women tend to be more likely to report their concerns and to seek subsequent treatment, whereas many men may not reveal their inner turmoil or take advantage of available therapy and counseling programs.

Encouraging early reporting, accurate screening, and meaningful prevention of these issues in members of the armed forces, whether troops are male or female, will likely have a positive effect on the growing worry over mental stability and health in the military.

In myriad ways, domestic violence can be responsible for taking a toll on quality of life and reducing victims’ overall well-being, and therapists and counselors along with other professionals in the psychology and psychiatry fields are frequently engaged in seeking ways to reduce or altogether end this issue among clients. When pregnant women are subjected to abuse by their partners, the effects can be especially devastating, potentially leading to physical health problems for the mother and child. Recently, a study performed by the National Institute of Child Health and Human Development in Washington, D.C. found that through interventional counseling, pregnant women self-reporting for abuse at home were not only likely to experience diminished rates of violence, but were also prone to avoiding severely premature births.

The study separated participants into two groups; one received normal obstetric care, while the other received normal care in addition to counseling aimed at identifying and reducing violence and abuse, treating depression, and helping women to quit smoking. The results showed that among women who identified as being abused, those in the interventional counseling group experienced incidents of abuse at a rate of less than half of that endured before the counseling was administered.

While the researchers were appreciative of the importance of these results, they also placed great emphasis on the fact that women in the counseling group had a much lower rate of giving birth before their thirty third week, a period marked as being especially premature, than the control group. The pregnancies of the counseling group, in fact, were able to gain an average of an extra week, a significant benefit for the delivery of fully developed and healthy babies. The study’s lead author suggested that with larger sample sizes, the technique may be proven to extend reliable advantages to pregnant women in abusive environments.

Part three of a three part series of articles.

There weren’t a lot of statistics, because no one thought it was a problem. But then in 1990, Ramsay–Klawsnick found that adult females were abusers of male adolescents 37% of the time and of female adolescents 19% of the time; and in six studies reviewed by Russell and FInkelhor, female perpetrators accounted for 25% or more of those abused. In 1996, The National Center on Child Abuse and Neglect conducted a widespread investigation on the maltreatment of children. Of the three million children investigated, more than one million were identified as victims of abuse and of the one million, 12% were sexually abused. The sexual abuse of children by women, primarily mothers, once thought to be so rare that it could be ignored, constituted 25% (approximately 36,000 children) of the sexually abused victims. Furthermore, all of these statistics are likely underestimated because victims of this type of abuse rarely disclose. Finally, there is an alarmingly high rate of sexual abuse by females in the backgrounds of rapists, sex offenders and sexually aggressive men – 59% (Petrovich and Templer, 1984), 66% (Groth, 1979) and 80% (Briere and Smiljanich, 1993).

Why haven’t we, as a society, been aware of this problem? Most probably because women have been idealized as mothers and nurturers. They haven’t been viewed as sexual aggressors. And because they are caretakers and are expected to be emotional, warm and physical with children, no one notices or suspects them. Sexual abuse by women is rarely reported because their victims usually are their own children – who are dependent on them. Furthermore, these children either do not understand what is happening to them or do not think anyone will believe them. And for male victims, there is additional embarrassment and denial – they must have wanted it – men (boys) can’t be raped!

But women can be sexual aggressors. And even though the abuse they are capable of doesn’t conjure up violent images of attack and penetration, surveys show that women are capable of a different type of violence toward their victims, sometimes physical and almost always psychological and verbal. This abuse can penetrate the psyches of their victims more deeply because they are the one person who was never supposed to betray them.

What type of woman would betray her own child or another person’s child in such a manner and why? A profile of a female sexual abuser looks something like this: She would probably be a person with low self-esteem who may have had a history of severe emotional and verbal abuse and/or been a victim of childhood sexual abuse herself. In fact, a study by Fowler et al in 1983 maintained that 80% of incest offenders had been sexually or physically abused as children. There would be feelings of alienation and isolation and possibly the loss of a spouse or other adult partner. She might have a history of drug or alcohol abuse and less often a history of indiscriminate or compulsive sexual activity. There might be arrested psychosexual development; there might be a need to have power and control in some aspect of her life. But the common perception that any woman who does this has to be mentally insane is false. Only a minority of female abusers do not pass reality-testing measures. How the abuse takes place and with who may differ, but the personality type can be constructed from the above profile.

David Finkelhor, who has written extensively on this subject, maintains that there is a Four Factor Model, or to put it another way, there are four components that contribute in different degrees to child molestation:

1. Emotional Congruence – a satisfaction of emotional needs through the abuse of a child that is due to either arrested psychosexual development, immaturity or low self-esteem.
2. Sexual Arousal – probably due to familial conditioning through their own childhood abuse or early fantasy reinforced by masturbation.
3. Blockage – Age appropriate sexual opportunities have been cut off by either a traumatic sexual experience with an adult, sexual dysfunction, limited social skills or a marital disturbance such as the loss of a spouse. The latter has been described as a “Theory of Loss” phenomenon precipitating abuse.
4. Disinhibition – due to poor impulse control either because of substance abuse, a chaotic family background or psychotic mental illness.

There are women who are pedophiles and simply pursue children for the sex, but the female abuser usually falls into one of three categories:

1. Predisposed Offender – the abuser was herself abused as a child and she continues the generational pattern by abusing her own children. It is thought that she becomes an offender in an effort to resolve her own childhood sexual trauma.
2. The Teacher/Lover – she generally becomes involved with an adolescent male with whom she relates to as a peer. She may be looking for non-threatening emotional intimacy.
3. The Male-Coerced Offender – she is being led by an abusive male who she is extremely dependent upon. But she may eventually initiate sexual abuse on her own.

While the public is periodically shocked into awareness by sensational revelations of the second and third type of female abuser (i.e. Hedda Nussbaum, Mary-Kay Latourneau), it is the first type that we have to finally give a face to – she is the one that is quietly victimizing thousands of young children who have nowhere to turn for safety. And the children ARE young. Studies have concluded that women abusers victimize younger children than male abusers – probably because of their role as caretakers. If current research is correct and more female than male children are sexually abused, then it is logical to conclude that more girls may grow up to be sexual offenders themselves and there may be a significantly larger number of female sexual abusers than we had previously imagined.

It is up to us to put aside deep-rooted myths about females, and more specifically mothers, in order to deal with the widespread problem of child abuse and more accurately expose all types of child sexual abusers.

©Copyright 2010 by Roni Weisberg-Ross L.M.F.T. All Rights Reserved. Permission to publish granted to GoodTherapy.org. The following article was solely written and edited by the author named above. The views and opinions expressed are not necessarily shared by GoodTherapy.org. Questions or concerns about the following article can be directed to the author or posted as a comment to this blog entry. Click here to contact Roni and/or see her GoodTherapy.org Profile

Though the experience of giving birth and becoming a mother is a joyous one for many, some mothers may experience prolonged or chronic periods of emotional and mental difficulty following their deliveries, and a state of post-partum depression may make life less enjoyable. Hoping to help women fight the onset of this fairly common pregnancy challenge, researchers at the University of Wisconsin have suggested that a heightened intake of Omega 3 fatty acids during pregnancy can help avoid symptoms, and have also noted that group psychotherapy for mothers has proven to be an effective treatment option.

The symptoms of depression can be especially difficult for those experiencing serious medical health issues in tandem with thoughts and feelings of sadness, apathy, or emotional fatigue. In women recovering from heart-related medical problems such as a heart attack or major surgery, depression is often developed, and may contribute to a reluctance to attend rehabilitation programs and adopt important lifestyle changes. The goal of a recently published study from the University of South Florida’s College of Nursing has been to merge cardiac rehabilitation programs with effective therapy measures, helping to address both issues in a single, supporting, gender-specific environment. The study has reported significant success over a five-year study period.

The World Health Organization, in an effort to identify health issues in need of reform around the globe, has recently released a report on the state of women’s health, particularly in poor and middle-income countries. Citing broad instances of medical health issues such as death during childbirth, the report also notes that stigmas against women participating in mental health services results in a lowered ability of women to take good care of themselves and of their families. The report is hoped to contribute to global efforts to bring mental health accessibility to a larger audience and to focus on the particular needs of women.

There is plenty of anecdotal evidence to suggest that in general, women are better able to identify emotions than men. But until recently, it has been difficult to secure objective, meaningful findings upon which furhter research can be based. The need for such evidence has been addressed recently with the completion of a study performed at Université de Montréal. The study tested women and men for their powers of identification of fear and disgust, two important emotions in terms of psychological evolution. Using live and recorded actors, the study was able to incorporate facial movements, an aspect of emotion identification that has been absent in previous efforts. The research may help develop tools to help men improve their ability to perceive others.

While the links between the occurrences of sexual activity and overall mental health and well-being have been widely documented among men, especially within the context of examining treatments for erectile dysfunction, studies focusing on the role of sexual satisfaction have been more difficult to perform. Citing the fact that the number of sexual events experienced by a woman does not indicate her level of sexual satisfaction at a comparable rate with those of men, the researchers behind a recent study performed at Monash University in Australia suggest that self-reporting measures are far more accurate. The research team set out to establish the relationship between sexual satisfaction, age, and well-being among women in the local Australian community, and recruited women who self-identified as being either sexually satisfied or dissatisfied, and who were also asked questions to determine whether they were pre- or post-menopausal.

With a sizable study group, the researchers compared collected from the women, including the number of sexual events experienced each month (the minimum rate for inclusion in the study was two), and whether a partner had been present, along with further questions about the quality of experience and self-perceived well-being. The researchers found that in general, those women of an older age group were found to have more positive associations between sexual satisfaction and overall well-being than were younger women, and the results also suggested that those women who perceived themselves as being sexually satisfied were also more likely to experience a high degree of well-being, in comparison to participants who identified as sexually dissatisfied.

Though the subject is in need of additional study to determine whether sexual dissatisfaction or a poor sense of well-being is the origination point of the cycle, the researchers note that the work should further the cause of women’s sexual and overall health.

There have been many studies and proposed programs suggesting that the incorporation of exercise into one’s regular routing can go a long way towards both warding off depression and treating it in those already exhibiting symptoms. The positive effects of exercise on mental health are well-documented, but the precise ways in which physical activity can aid in the fight against depression may not always be exactly clear. It is for this reason that a study conducted at the University of Nottingham in the UK has been especially well-received. The study worked with a selection of women indicated for feelings of depression, and chose a certain number to participate in regular exercise treatment routines, while the study group was introduced to a supportive regimen of counseling and exercise.

The study was in part established based on the notion that standard gym exercise routines often fail to produce positive results for those with depression because of the relative isolation of the activity. To counteract this isolation, the study group was given extensive motivational counseling sessions before each period of physical activity, and participants took part in low-impact exercise on treadmills in communicative, supportive groups. Emotional support was on-hand throughout the exercising segments to allow for extra encouragement and help as needed.

Reporting on the experience after taking part in the counseling and exercise routines, participants noted that the personal attention and encouragement to return and continue the treatment played an important role in their success –and those participants who worked with counseling and group exercise were successful indeed, enjoying significant improvements in mood, physical health, and overall well-being. The study may help make depression-related exercise plans better tailored for those seeking new and effective treatments.

Working through feelings of depression can be a significant challenge at any point of life, but women who become pregnant may experience additional difficulty in the face of numerous restrictions regarding traditional treatment. As a number of psychiatric medications indicated for feelings of depression are not recommended for use during pregnancy, suggests a recently released review of published literature on the topic, psychotherapy may present a more sound and comfortable treatment choice for pregnant women. Depressed mothers who seek out psychotherapy may be able to help their babies lead more prosperous and healthy lives in their first years.

Traditionally, adolescence is one of the most turbulent periods in a woman’s life; though rich in the opportunity for great experiences, the time can also be difficult as girls work through self-image and social issues that can sometimes take a heavy toll on well-being. Over the past year, a New Jersey private practice social worker has been helping her young female patients gain a valuable tool in this volatile period: the group therapy dynamic. While group therapy has largely been focused on topical issues in recent years, “Sistertalk” focuses on the particular needs of adolescent girls, helping them explore and understand common challenges and provide confidential support that is proving to make an extraordinary difference in terms of self-esteem and confidence. As the number of young adults seeking therapy increases, such programs may become more widely developed and accepted.

The Detroit Free Press recently published an article reporting that former Alaska Governor Sarah Palin was experiencing significant hair loss as a result of the extreme stress she has endured over the past several months. Rallying interest in the issue, the article seeks out the wisdom of a prominent dermatologist to explain the links between stress and the loss of hair in women. While such events can occur in men, as well, reported instances of stress-related hair loss are more often brought to the fore by females.

The dermatologist notes that hair follicles in a normal, “growing” state can become shocked during highly stressful events, such as a death in the family or giving birth, causing the hair to fall out around three months later. In fact, the dermatologist notes that clients who report a sudden loss of a significant amount of hair are best addressed with the question as to what was happening in their life three months previous. While in most cases the hair is able to simply grow back, the personal care and beauty concern involved in thinning hair may lead more women to take on a greater responsibility to reduce stress in their lives.

As part of this effort, women may make a greater effort to seek the professional services afforded through psychotherapy, particularly during and after stressful events, whether it’s a new step in life or the ending of another, or even the resignation of a major political office. While personal concern over mental health and well-being on a day to day basis is of course likely to win more importance to women than cosmetic concerns, the benefit of a great and natural head of hair may nevertheless be one of therapy’s more intriguing and attention-getting benefits.

Conflicts, whether in the form of overt fights, hidden resentments, or other issues common in marriages, can be strong indicators for a range of mental health concerns, including depression. Studying the medical as well as the psychological effects of difficult marriages, a study conducted at the University of Utah has sought to discern differences between how men and women react. After taking measurements from blood pressure to waist circumferences, the research team presented participants with an inventory of questions addressing their feelings about their marriages. The study found that while both sexes are more depressed when in difficult marriages, women show a significant increase in heart disease risk factors.

The rates of anti-depression and related pharmaceuticals is on the rise, as psychotherapists strive to reach clients with deep and meaningful change many, especially those in the medical establishment, choose to treat issues solely with medications. Recently, a research team in Spain sought to discover the relationship between medication use and established family dysfunction. While the team’s research did not return any significant correlation between dysfunctional family relationships and medication use, it did reveal that an alarming 24% of Spain’s women take anti-depressants, and that over 30% take tranquilizers. Though the mental health professions are gaining popularity and credibility in Spain as in many other parts of the world, a clear need for more quality psychotherapeutic care exists.

The prevalence of post-partum depression, or PPD, may seem out of place in a society that seems to unabashedly celebrate the processes of giving birth and becoming a mother. Yet many women experience PPD, which is widely recognized as having an adverse effect on infants as well as the relationship between a mother and her child. With this potential for long-term consequences in family relations in mind, a team of researchers with the Boston University School of Social Work set out to examine the efficacy and methodological details of modern therapies in the field. The study found that overwhelmingly, the integration of the infants themselves in therapy sessions was hailed as resulting in higher success rates and more deeply reaching change.

The researchers based their work on interviews with a panel of mental health professionals, comprised of an educator, psychologists, psychiatrists, and social workers, all of whom had twenty or more years’ worth of experience working with PPD patients. The interviewees described the ability of integrative therapies to help anchor the client in the present and create avenues of communication and understanding between a mother and her baby.

In the first few months of development, communication is a critical component of growth, yet many mothers, especially those suffering from PPD or related mood disorders, feel incapable of making such meaningful connections. The study’s body of professionals notes that introducing ways to understand infants and their behaviors during this time, as well as developing methods for response and interaction, can go a long way towards not only fostering healthy child development, but towards replacing the symptoms of PPD with positive, pro-active ideas and activities for affected mothers. The study aims to help mental health professionals increase their understanding of PPD and to spur new ideas about how to care for clients whether they’re new parents or as new to life as infants. The results appear in the latest issue of Infant Mental Health Journal.

Click here to contact Ruth and/or see her GoodTherapy.org Profile

In the year 2011 the first wave of the 76 million baby-boomers will turn 65. Our changing demographics, fueled by increased longevity and the aging of baby-boomers creates the basis for a social transformation heretofore unknown in America.

Because of our increased life expectancy, and better health care, aging and concepts of middle age means something very different today to women than it did to previous generations. It is a time of spiritual and psychological potentials. It is a time when a woman becomes a wise woman or crone.

There can be rewards of growing older that include self determination, freedom of choice, joys of relationships, meaningful work and interests, social support, spirituality, and self-understanding. The benefits of these rewards also include emotional balance, self-assurance, inner directedness, self-acceptance, and acceptance of one’s current life.

Baby-Boomer women are aging differently than any generations before them. They challenged the norms of prior generations. It began in the 1960’s when they protested the war, ushered in the first wave of women’s liberation, developed careers beyond the traditional women’s roles of teaching, nursing or office administration. They challenged the norms of society, made conscious choices about marriage, divorce and/or being single. They made, and continue to make alternative decisions about methods of birthing, health care, retirement, and death and dying. In short, they have questioned the norms that society had previously set. This author believes baby-boomers will follow the same paradigms as they move into the next cycle of their lives.

There can be rewards of growing older that include self determination, freedom of choice, joys of relationships, meaningful work and interests, social support, spirituality, and self-understanding. The benefits of these rewards also include emotional balance, self-assurance, inner directedness, self-acceptance, and acceptance of one’s current life.

Dr. Jean Shinoda Bolen expressed that our culture does not value the wisdom of old age and women, thus creating a potential for anxiety about aging. For example, in past history women were burned at the stake and called witches for having knowledge. She pointed out positive spiritual and psychological possibilities women gain as they become wise women. To become a wise woman a postmenopausal woman has to overcome her fears of aging and fears of speaking with authority. Comparing traditional and tribal societies where the crone is considered a woman’s time or arrival into her full wisdom and power in contrast to our modern society that reveres the glamour of youth; often at the expense of maturity. Menopause can be an exhilarating time of freedom, growth, and empowerment. The rewards of aging include an inner directedness, self acceptance and acceptance of one’s current life.

Mid-life baby-boomer women are on a passage to becoming wise crones. This generation is defining aging in a new paradigm. Midlife no longer defines the stereotypes of old age that once included limitations, loneliness, and retirement. Life can be an opportunity for rewards connected with aging; an expansion from the rich knowledge and experiences that have been part of their life’s path. The path of aging can be one filled with new horizons.

Women can learn to celebrate the freedom that comes with becoming a crone. Because of our increased life expectancy, and better health care, aging and concepts of middle age means something very different today than it did in previous generations. Instead of entering menopause with anxiety and a sense of loss, it should be a time to claim power at this phase of life. It is a time of spiritual and psychological potentials. This phase of life brings possibility of wisdom about life and the potential to inspire others through this insight.

©Copyright 2009 by Ruth Subrin, M.A. MFT-AT. All Rights Reserved. Permission to publish granted to GoodTherapy.org. The following article was solely written and edited by the author named above. The views and opinions expressed are not necessarily shared by GoodTherapy.org. Questions or concerns about the following article can be directed to the author or posted as a comment to this blog entry. Click here to contact Ruth and/or see her GoodTherapy.org Profile

After the stresses of pregnancy and birth and the approaching responsibilities of motherhood, having a child can produce a fair amount of anxiety and depression, even in those new mothers who experience joy in connection with their child. In the modern climate of pharmaceutical breakthroughs, this Post-Partum Depression is often shrugged off as a pesky result of some pregnancies, and treated with a regimen of anti-depressants or other drugs. But two new studies performed by the University of Toronto in Canada and the University of Huddersfield in the United Kingdom suggest that cognitive behavioral therapy can be a more effective tool in the struggle against PPD, and is significantly more successful in alleviating depressed feelings among new mothers than traditional post-natal medical care alone.

The University of Toronto study focused on new mothers with Post-Partum Depression over periods of six and twelve months. The women were given short, one-hour sessions with a cognitive behavioral therapist once a week for a period of eight weeks, while the control group was attended to by means of usual medical care, without the benefit of therapy. After a period of six months, many women who participated in therapy sessions reported a drop or cessation of symptoms, and this was significantly compounded at the one-year mark. What’s more, those women who reported feelings of depression six weeks following delivery were less than half as likely to report the same symptoms at six months as those mothers who received traditional care.

Additionally, the University of Huddersfield study selected pregnant women at a high risk of developing PPD, and supplied them with regular communication with other, experienced mothers via telephone. This tactic resulted in a halving of diagnosed cases among the study group following birth. Whether implemented during pregnancy or after the baby is brought home, one thing is made clear by these studies, both published this week: talking it out may be the best medicine.

This relatively new area of therapy is emerging as an important part of the process for many women who choose to terminate their pregnancy.

The political controversy over abortion may make the process more confusing or upsetting for some. But even leaving politics aside, research indicates that having an abortion is a very difficult decision for the vast majority of women and that the aftermath is likely to lead to at least some emotional and psychological challenges, whether they are minor and short-lived, or more intense and long-lasting. Having second thoughts, guilt, internal conflict, grief, or other challenging emotions and thoughts is somewhat typical, and the nonjudgmental, compassionate ear of a good clinician can be very helpful in working through these thoughts and feelings.

Men whose partners have an abortion may also experience internal conflict or unpleasant feelings, and should not hesitate to talk about this in therapy. Couples work may be particularly helpful – if also especially challenging at times – when an abortion has occurred in the relationship.

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