When Is the Marriage Really Over?
Anthony kind of slumped into the office and comfortably settled himself into the easy chair. “Doc,” he said, “I’m here to find out if my marriage is over. To me, it seems like it really is.” He went on to explain that his wife, Julie, and he had been living two separate lives for as long as he could remember. She was very involved with the children’s activities; she worked full time and had a rather hectic schedule as a corporate attorney. They rarely ate together and their conversations, though cordial, were impersonal.
“She had a function at work and invited me to come,” he... Read More
Although 
Definition: Gravitational Pull; The attraction that one object has for another object due to the invisible force of gravity. The mass of an object affects its gravitational pull. The gravitational pull of the Sun keeps the planets in orbit around it.
I was counseling a couple the other day, with a newly diagnosed child. Let's call them John and Mary. Mary described feeling unappreciated by her husband, tired all the time, and frustrated by having to "do everything" around the house. John complained that Mary spent all of her time with their 3-year-old son, Jimmy, who is severely affected by... 
I was counseling a couple recently and as the session was coming to a close I was asked point blank, “How many couples come to see you with infidelity?” I had to stop for a moment and think, “About 30% of the couples I treat work with infidelity issues,” I answered.
Then I thought: That’s what I see, but I bet most couples probably don’t even make it as far as the counseling room. Where cheating is involved, many couples likely break up after the affair is revealed.
I am thinking of tales from history — people I used to know before becoming a counselor, and just stories of... 
Extradyadic involvement (EDI), also known as infidelity, occurs in many relationships. At times, the 
Technology can have a marvelous effect on sexuality in many ways. One example is the vibrator, which has helped countless women discover that we can indeed pleasure ourselves to orgasm. This in turn leads many of us to become orgasmic with a partner, so everyone’s happy.
On the other hand, extraordinary advances in technology can have a profoundly negative effect on sexual pleasure. A perfect example is In Vitro Fertilization (IVF), for which Robert Edwards won the 2010 Nobel Prize in Medicine. During IVF, one or more eggs are removed from the woman and mated with sperm in a petri dish outside... 
According to a new study, couples who have high levels of marital discord are at increased risk for coronary artery disease (CAD). “Marital disruption (i.e., separation, divorce) and strain (i.e., conflict, dissatisfaction) predict the development of CHD (coronary heart disease) and poor prognosis for heart patients,” said Timothy W. Smith of the Department of Psychology at the University of Utah. “The uncertain role of marital quality in early stages of coronary artery disease (CAD) before the onset of clinically apparent CHD complicates the design of CHD risk assessments and risk-reducing... 
In many ways it would appear that breaking up is similar to falling in love. I know what you are thinking, and you are right - it’s not quite the same thing. However, in terms of the physiological effects that it has on your mind, psyche and body, it would appear to have quite a significant effect as it can potentially turn your world upside down.
Breakups can throw our worlds into a chaos similar to falling in love, I would suggest. Dr. Helen Fisher wrote a book called Why We Love, and in her book she discussed the chemical changes that actually take place in the human brain and body when... 
Intimate relationships provide emotional support and companionship that can result in many positive psychological health benefits. But often, marriage can be a source of stress. For African-American couples, the success of their relationships can be significantly influenced by specific factors, including income and education. In a recent study, Carolyn E. Cutrona of the Department of Psychology at Iowa State University used the vulnerability-stress-adaptation model of adaptive processes, stressful life events and enduring vulnerabilities to gauge marital stability in African-American couples. “Of... 
As a Relationship Therapist of over 20 years, I have seen clients make one mistake that causes an otherwise non-threatening conversation to turn into one that is fraught with misunderstanding and dissatisfaction. While the importance of this one behavior is intuitive, it is not always obvious. Science has shown the powerful and crucial role it plays in understanding our partner, getting our needs met, and making our romantic relationships more solid and stable.
The one thing you can do: Look your partner in the face.
Here is what science tells us: our brains are wired to connect with others.... 
The formation of interpersonal bonds is critical to the maintenance of a healthy relationship. In 
Individuals who have avoidant 
Last month I discussed the dilemma of a psychologically wounded person who feels torn between a yearning to get his deepest needs met – a need for connection, safety and love – and a terror that those needs will be rejected (subtly or otherwise), leading to a traumatic abandonment, or re-abandonment in most cases. This creates dueling goals: to be loved and to maintain connection through inevitable “bumps” on the relational road, which in the person’s life has proven impossible. Thus the faith that lasting relational intimacy can be found is slim to none, assuming it exists at all.
Those... 
There are ways of handling things that just shoot you in the foot, and then there are ways that have the other person willingly and happily eating out of your hand. Which would you rather it was?
In this article, I’ve taken extensive material from the web, from books, from years of my own research, and from my site and consolidated it into a ten-point scale, with 1 being the least aggressive and 10 being unquestionably abusive. Each value on the scale is a template for an abusive type of statement. I hope you find the scale to be helpful.
1 – “Do you think I’m stupid?”
This statement... 
