Category: Grief, Loss, and Bereavement

The Good Therapy Blog

Evolution of Empathy: Scientists Study Physical and Emotional Pain Responses

May 14th, 2013 . 3 Comments

When someone is in physical pain, it is common for others to respond to that pain, both physically and emotionally. They may act in ways that will help alleviate the physical pain, and they may actually feel emotional symptoms of the other person’s pain. Likewise, when emotional pain is witnessed, such as grieving, witnesses may also feel a sense of sadness or loss. These two different... Read More

Talking to Children About National Tragedies

April 19th, 2013 . 4 Comments

When children begin to ask questions about national tragedies, parents may be at a loss for what to say. There’s a fine line between keeping children completely ignorant about the world and giving them so much information that they’re terrified. By talking to your children about national tragedies in an age-appropriate, reassuring way, you provide them with a safe option for discussing their feelings and can help to dispel fear and increase ... Read More

Caregiver Intervention Shows Promise for Caregivers and Patients

April 5th, 2013 . 7 Comments

More and more family members are becoming the primary caregivers for loved ones. Regardless of whether the role is born out of obligation, convenience or financial necessity, caregivers assume many responsibilities that are new and foreign to them. For those caring for loved ones with life-threatening illness, the role of caregiver can include physical, medical, and... Read More

Ready to Move On from Therapy … but How?

April 5th, 2013 . 5 Comments

Thank you for your question. Saying goodbye is painful, but the ability to begin and end a relationship kindly and in full consciousness is a hallmark of acceptance of self and other—of reality. You write that you were in treatment on and off with your previous therapist for many years, and with this latest person for several months. It’s interesting that you don’t feel like exploring what it is to say goodbye, “as it hasn’t helped … in the past,” and that you “wrestle with this issue almost constantly.” Wrestling with something... Read More

Attachment Styles May Influence Duration of Grieving

March 12th, 2013 . 4 Comments

The grief process is different for every individual and is shaped by social, personal, and psychological factors. For instance, people who are highly resilient, who have strong support systems, and who have stable psychological health may go through the bereavement process much more quickly and much more adaptively than people with fewer coping resources. One trait that has been theorized to have a tremendous impact on the grieving process is the attachment style of... Read More

How Children Grieve the Loss of a Sibling

March 8th, 2013 . 4 Comments

Losing a child is a devastating and life-altering experience. Not only are the parents and extended family members of the deceased significantly affected by the loss, but siblings of the deceased are also dramatically impacted. When a child dies, the well-being of the parents is often everyone’s primary concern, and it seems that few studies have looked at how children grieve the loss of a sibling. Understanding the coping strategies they use and exploring their emotional state during the grieving process can provide an important contribution... Read More

Losing Both Parents by Age 27: How I Began to Heal

March 5th, 2013 . 17 Comments

I woke up to my dad staring blankly at the wall the morning of October 14, 2004. It was the day before my 23rd birthday. I knew this day was coming, but nothing would prepare me to wake up and find my dad no longer alive—just a lifeless shell. He had battled Hodgkin’s lymphoma for a year and a half. At 54, his time here was over. After my mom and I had cried over his body and walked the body bag down the hall, we decided to go out for lunch. Such an odd next... Read More

Combating Depression in People with Cancer

March 5th, 2013 . 9 Comments

From the minute they hear the words “you have cancer,” newly diagnosed patients face a storm of emotions. Almost every patient will experience feelings of fear or sadness. Psychologists agree that this is a natural reaction to the major changes that are about to take place in their lives. If the feelings of sadness reach a certain level—one in which depressive symptoms last for more... Read More

Negative Self-Beliefs: Are You a ‘Beaten Dog’?

February 27th, 2013 . 8 Comments

Are you a “beaten dog”? Rest assured, I’m not calling anyone names here. But have you been kicked around, treated like nothing, and hurt? Do you not feel loved unless you are treated badly? This is what I mean when I say “beaten dog.” If you are offended, maybe some truth is staring you in the face. If you are not offended, I’m glad—and while this may not apply to you, perhaps it does apply to someone you know. If it does apply to you and you can see how this role has affected your life, I want to apologize. No one should feel beaten,... Read More

Five Forgiveness Facts for Divorce Recovery

February 19th, 2013 . 29 Comments

When it comes to your divorce, the very idea of forgiveness might feel impossible or even incomprehensible. You might ask yourself, “Why would I ever forgive someone who hurt me and ruined my life?” The answer is that just as anger and resentment feel empowering and often illusively relieve the pain... Read More

My Sad Valentine: Good Grief and Love

February 13th, 2013 . 13 Comments

The trappings of Valentine’s Day have a unique way of pointing our attention toward our basic relational hopes in life. Perhaps our hope is to be adored fully by another. Perhaps it is to belong to something larger than ourselves. Perhaps we are hoping only to be remembered momentarily with fondness by relative strangers. Valentine’s Day pivots our attention to what we have and/or have not received from others. Such taunting of the human heart is a high-stakes affair. As high as our romantic hopes may reach, so too lie the unexpected depths... Read More

When Depression Might Not Be Depression After All

February 11th, 2013 . 8 Comments

When we lose something important to us, it is natural to feel something similar to depression that is normal grief. It can be intense sadness, and may include low energy, an inability to imagine things feeling good again, loss of pleasure, longing for what is lost, and less ability to function in thinking, sleeping, eating, sexuality, and working. The main difference between depression... Read More

Topic Expert Roundup: Therapists Troubled by Military Suicide Epidemic

February 5th, 2013 . 8 Comments

The number of U.S. military suicides reached an all-time high in 2012, with the 349 self-inflicted deaths—nearly one per day—far exceeding the number of combat deaths during the same span. Equally troubling is the rate of suicide among military veterans. According to a study by the Department of Veterans Affairs, 22 veterans, on average, take their own lives each day, or one every 65 minutes. People ages 50 and over account for 69% of those deaths. Clearly, more... Read More

Grief Mythology

February 5th, 2013 . 7 Comments

It is not unusual for someone who experiences a loss to romanticize the person, identity, or object they are grieving. This can occur even when what is lost was not just imperfect, but harmful. This tendency occurs more often and can be more harmful with folks who experienced depression, anxiety, or other... Read More