Comments on: Boundaries

By: Ofer Zur, Ph.D.

Ofer Zur, Ph.D. — Wed, 07 Oct 2009 19:13:24 +0000

Regarding the statement of “As the person in the position of greater power and influence, it is your responsibility to set and maintain boundaries.” I agree that it is the therapist’s responsibility to set and maintain boundaries. It must be clearly acknowledged that sometimes the therapist has neither the power nor the capacity to set clear boundaries, such as in situations such as small town, small communities, the military, prisons, sport psychology, etc. It is an illusion to think that therapists are always “the person in the position of greater power and influence.” Some of our clients are more powerful than we are in certain areas. Some therapists are rather fragile themselves.

By: visitor

visitor — Fri, 26 Dec 2008 03:13:01 +0000

whenever I try to set a boundary with this person at work, he gets energized to further violate it thinking it’s some kind of oppportunity/game. He’s worse than a normal bully, because with a bully, they will finally respect your clear no. But with this character, the more I say no, the worse it gets. It’s getting harder and harder to bear and I’m starting to be provoked to make verbal angry outbursts thus making me looking like the bad one.

By: Lila

Lila — Sat, 06 Dec 2008 01:15:09 +0000

thanks for the presentation today Chris. i enjoyed learning about men from your perspective…but men still remain a mystery to me!

By: Wendy

Wendy — Sun, 30 Nov 2008 17:50:39 +0000

This is a very interesting article and I didn’t realize how many boundaries there were and the crossing of them. I think a lot of us could benefit in learning and knowing what our boundaries are and as the article stated, work on the ones we need to work on.

By: jill

jill — Sun, 30 Nov 2008 17:49:08 +0000

I feel the same as Oliver. I have my space, a space that I do not want anyone stepping into where it makes me feel uncomfortable. I agree that boundaries should be discussed at first hand in therapy and it is okay to be consoling and understanding, but at the same time, know the boundaries.

By: Oliver

Oliver — Sun, 30 Nov 2008 16:31:25 +0000

I have this thing about maintaining my own personal space and wish that others felt the same way that I do. There are many times when people just get too darn close to me and I really cannot stand it. And the ones that really drive me crazy are the ones who do not notice that I will have to back away from them when I feel that they are invading my space. This is very irritating. I try to abide by the rules of personal space and wish that everyone else could too. This does not mean that I do not enjoy being in proximity to others but I need room to breathe that is comfortable to me.

By: Gabrielle

Gabrielle — Sat, 29 Nov 2008 09:59:00 +0000

I learnt tm in India 5 years ago. Done me a world of good. Definitely helped me stay calm in all kinds of situations since.

By: Bella

Bella — Sat, 29 Nov 2008 04:21:29 +0000

Being a counsellor myself, its important to have dispassionate views and be objective with a patient or client. Leaving behind personal tensions, mental and physical fatigue as well as emotions is important while imparting counselling or therapy.

By: Gwen

Gwen — Thu, 27 Nov 2008 08:57:51 +0000

I think boundaries are something people tend to cross, however professional one is. It’s ok to reach out to a client to put them at ease but being a leaning shoulder can be problematic.

By: Eddie

Eddie — Wed, 26 Nov 2008 14:15:12 +0000

Seems to me that boundaries for the patient and therapist relationship should be established from the very first meeting. You know that if they are not someone is going to cross a line somewhere along the way and the other is going to be uncomfortable.