Are you scared of aging?
March 24th, 2008 |
By Jennifer B Baxt, LMFT, LMHC
While it is understandable that most people have a natural tendency to feel uncomfortable with their own aging and mortality, there are a few in the crowd who are horrified by the natural process to the point of having a phobia. The phobia where people are terrified of aging is called gerascophobia. Though, to say it is simply a fear of growing old can be a little deceiving. Gerascophobia is perhaps more the fear of what can happen to a person when they grow old. It could mean a loss of independence they value, the wrinkles they will develop, the loss of hair (mostly in the case of men), any diseases that can come from aging, or even a retirement they don’t know what to do with. For many people, these thoughts briefly cross their mind and are quickly brushed away with reasoning; aging is a natural process that happens to everyone and they will deal with it when the time comes. Unfortunately, for the few who suffer gerascophobia, it is something that brings on anxiety and fear about something they really don’t have any control over. Perhaps the lack of control is one of the major worries for these individuals as well; a lack of control whether they will end up in a nursing home, for example.
How does a person know if they actually suffer from gerascophobia? It depends on a person’s reaction to the idea of their growing old and not being able to accept that it is a natural process of life that they don’t have control over. If thinking about it brings on elevated blood pressure, sweating, excessive worry, or even a panic attack, it is a possibility. This phobia can even cause people to withdraw from society and become anti-social. The phobia can even develop into a fear of losing loved ones when not dealt with properly. A professional, such as a therapist or a counselor, can often help a person find out if what they are suffering from really is the gerascophobia, or another condition, such as depression that can often lead a person to focus more on the negative in life than the positive.
Gerascophobia is a real phobia that real people suffer, as strange as it may seem. For some people, facing their own mortality fills them with an uncontrollable dread they can’t get rid of. For anyone who believes they might have this, consulting a therapist or a counselor would be a good idea. A professional opinion, followed by the right therapy, could help a person deal with this phobia so that it doesn’t prevent them from enjoying the life they have. Therapists or counselors can help a person deal with their fear in a way that can allow them to accept that growing old is nothing to be afraid of and that they should be focusing more on their day to day life, as well as the time they spend with loved ones, than to focus all their attention on something they cannot control. To spend an entire life fearing old age will only bring it on earlier as the stress caused by the phobia will eventually take its toll on a person, whether it is in a physical way, a mental way, or in both ways.
©Copyright 2008 by Jennifer B Baxt, LMFT, LMHC. All Rights Reserved. Permission to publish granted to GoodTherapy.org. The following article was solely written and edited by the author named above. The views and opinions expressed are not necessarily shared by GoodTherapy.org. Questions or concerns about the following article can be directed to the author or posted as a comment to this blog entry.
12 comments so far
Growing old is certainly something I think everyone fears on some level. But, to be consumed by the fear must certainly be a difficult way to live. Growing old does present legitimate challenges. But, no one can predict how they will handle the challenges nor the consequences of the way to handle those challenges until they are in the situation themselves. So, to worry about what will happen in that portion of life really is, well, a waste of time. Getting therapy to help calm such fears is extremely well worth the time and effort. Otherwise, those who don’t seek therapy will end up looking back and realizing how much time they have wasted that they cannot get back.
Watching my grandmother grow old did instill this sort of phobia in me. I watched her go from an independent, feisty woman to one who could not take care of even her most basic needs. I did get therapy for this phobia and it helped tremendously. Now when the old fears start creeping in, I have a list of things to do to keep them at bay. I am very grateful that I have my life back and can enjoy the present rather than dreading the future.
Thanks for a great article!
What sorts of strategies do you recommend for those in this situation? Seems like it would be an easy fix-how long do people usually stay in therapy for this?
thanks for all the replys and it seems like we have a great conversation going here. This fear is not one that necessarily needs therapy, but one that should be addressed. In this day and age, people are living well into the hundreds and more and more people are saying that 60 is the new 40. I believe that if you have a fear, it comes from watching someone that you care about die or even get sick and you need to understand what is really behind the fear.
This was quite an interesting articcle though I guess I must not have this fear because I have never really viewed aging this way. I like to look at things in a positive light, like the laugh lines on my face show just how many chances I have had to enjoy life over the years. So I just don’t think this fear applies to me and I think it would be very sad living life every day yet dreading the inevitability of what is to come.
My grandfather died after years of suffering with Alzheimer’s and I definitely have a fear that this will be me one day. I try not to think about it but I must admit it does hit me like a tom of bricks some days and I just do not know what I would do if this happened to me or another family member.
Having a fear and actually having a reason to be scared are different in my opinion. I have a lot of cancer in my family, especially breast cancer. This is a reality for me, not just a fear and I try to be cautious of this and work towards being cautious of my family history of illness. I believe that being aware is the first step of facing your fears.
There is a big difference for me between knowing the possibilities that aging brings and being consumed by the fear of all of these things coming to light. We just all have to do waht we can to keep our minds sharp and our bodies fit so that many of these worries will not overwhelm us. Face it- we are all growing older every day and there is nothing we can do to stop that process. It is a part of life!
Couldn’t agree more Maddie, seems like we live in a society that wants us to be scared so we will buy more products to prevent aging. Thxs for the interest.
haha thanks Jennifer- I actually work in an industry where I see women (and men) everyday who are so afraid of having a line or a wrinkle that they are constantly searching for that new found fountain of youth. What is so wrong with growing old and aging gracefully? We have almost lost our ability as a society to do this because so many are afraid of looking old.
I found your site on technorati and read a few of your other posts. Keep up the good work. I just added your RSS feed to my Google News Reader. Looking forward to reading more from you….